Reading Time: 74 Minutes

Title: Rocks Under Tide
Series: Like Stars Aligned
Series Order: 3
Author: Bythia
Fandom: 9-1-1
Genre: Established Relationship, Family, Slash
Relationship(s): Evan “Buck” Buckley/Tommy Kinard
Content Rating: PG-13
Warnings: *No Mandatory Warnings Apply, discussion-child abuse, homophobia
Author Note: I very much enjoyed exploring some of my headcanon for Tommy’s life in this story. I’ve put down some seeds for possibly adding more stories to this series in the future, but we’ll see.
Beta: starlitenite
Word Count: 40,039
Summary: Tommy left his father’s house as soon as he could after his 18th birthday and planned to never look back. Nearly two decades later, his father’s early death forces him to deal with family history, an estate he didn’t know about, and, worst of all, his stepmother and half-siblings.
Artist: penumbria

 

---

---

 

Chapter 06

Tommy felt overwhelmed and exhausted by the time he and Evan returned to the hotel in the early afternoon. They had skipped lunch, though their original plan had been to find somewhere after the meeting with Mason and Tommy’s family. Tommy still couldn’t believe what he had learned about his grandfather’s estate, and then there was also the contents of the safe deposit box—or, rather, boxes—they had brought back from the bank to deal with now. It was so much more than just the couple of journals Tommy had expected, and he had decided to just put it all in the transport boxes the bank had provided and take it with them without looking at any of it right away.

“Let’s bring the boxes up to the room and then get coffee down in the lounge,” Evan suggested. “We can deal with those journals and photo albums and whatever else there is later.”

“I’ve made plans for the evening,” Tommy said, before Evan could start making any further plans for the night. He appreciated how attuned Evan seemed to be to his mood at the moment, how he always seemed to know exactly when Tommy was so overwhelmed and needed a distraction. “I mean, I already planned our dinner and all that.”

Evan grinned. “Really? You didn’t tell me anything about that.”

“It’s a surprise,” Tommy said and winked at Evan. “We need to pick up something here at the hotel at 5 pm, and then it’s a little drive. So, you’ll just have to be patient until then.”

“I can be patient!”

Tommy grinned. “Sure. Let’s see if you can make it the rest of the afternoon without asking about it again.”

“Wanna bet?” Evan asked.

Tommy lowered his gaze—he had a suspicion where this was going. “What would you want to wager?”

Evan grinned brightly. “The hot tub.”

“No!” Tommy raised his hand and shook his head. Then he got out of the car before Evan could argue his point. Tommy opened the trunk and Evan joined him a moment later to take two of the four boxes.

“Come on,” Evan whined. “I promise, it will be great!”

“Until we have to call 9-1-1,” Tommy muttered and took the other two boxes. They were so tall that he could barely see over the top of the second box.

Evan huffed. “Why are you so convinced that’s what would happen?”

“Because I’ve responded to those calls twice, and that’s two times too many,” Tommy said.

Evan laughed. “Really? I’ve never had one.”

“It’s just a matter of time,” Tommy assured him. “Eventually, you’ll be called to a medical emergency because someone fainted in a hot tub. And when you arrive, you’ll be informed by the very embarrassed partner that they were not just relaxing in the hot tub when it happened.”

Evan laughed all the way until the elevator from the parking garage reached the hotel lobby. As a security measure, they had to switch elevators there. Evan was still laughing when they stepped into the lobby and turned to the other elevator.

“Mr. Kinard?”

Tommy turned and looked at the middle-aged man approaching them from the reception area.

“There is a young gentleman waiting for you in the lobby,” the receptionist said. “He has been here for quite a while, insisting that he would wait until you arrived.”

Tommy frowned. “Young man? How young?”

“A teenager,” the receptionist said. “He has been holding on to his second soda for quite some time now. I’m not convinced he can afford a third drink, to be honest. But he is adamant he couldn’t just leave a message for you but had to speak with you.”

“I…” Tommy trailed off, wondering if he could just insist that the hotel send whoever was waiting for him away. If Mason ever admitted who in his office had given out the information about their hotel, Tommy would be sure to curse that person out.

“I can have someone bring those up to your room,” the receptionist offered with the kind of smile that told Tommy he would very much prefer Tommy deal with the problem of the visitor.

“I’d appreciate that,” Tommy said.

The boxes were dealt with swiftly, so just a couple of minutes later, Tommy and Evan were following the receptionist to the lounge. Tommy had feared a little bit that Benjamin might be waiting for him, so he was relieved when he didn’t recognize the teenager who was clutching a nearly empty glass and jumped up nervously as he saw them approach.

“You’re Thomas Kinard?” the boy asked hesitantly.

Tommy nodded but turned to the receptionist first. “Thank you for your help. Could we have a coffee for Evan and me? And another glass of whatever he had for our guest.”

“Of course, Mr. Kinard.”

When the receptionist retreated, Tommy turned to the boy. “Who are you?”

“Ben’s best friend,” he blurted out. “Ah, I mean. I’m Max. Ben asked me for a favor.”

“Ben as in Benjamin Lombard?” Tommy asked and gestured at the chair for Max to sit down again.

Max nodded, and they all sat down. “Yeah, that Ben. He was in that meeting with you earlier.”

“I’m not sure his mother would be happy knowing there was any kind of contact between Ben and me,” Tommy said. “Even just through you.”

Max huffed and fisted his hands in his lap. “Yeah, no shit. Ben didn’t even know you existed until a couple of years ago. And then everything everyone had to say about you was so clearly utter bullshit.”

Tommy raised his brows. “Really?”

Max looked from Tommy to Evan. “Are you Mr. Kinard’s boyfriend?”

“Yes,” Evan said, smiling. “You can call me Buck.”

Max bit his lip, turning to Tommy again. “That the reason you didn’t have contact with them?”

“One of many,” Tommy said.

“I figured when Ben called me yesterday.”

“Why are you here?” Tommy asked.

“Max found out about you because he was snooping around in the attic one day when we were … 11, I think. I was already 11, at least. Anyway, he found some boxes that he thinks his parents completely forgot were even there anymore,” Max explained. “That’s why I’m here, too. He gave me his key yesterday so I could sneak the boxes out of the attic while they were all in the meeting with you. He didn’t think he should come here to give them to you himself so you wouldn’t get into any trouble with his mom for talking to him.”

“What kind of boxes?” Tommy asked, confused. “I would’ve bet they threw away everything I left behind as soon as I left their house.”

“The name on the boxes is Sonja.”

For a moment, Tommy felt as if his heart had stopped.

“Years ago, when Ben found them, we snooped through them,” Max said and ducked his head. “That’s how he found out about you. We figured those boxes were your mom’s. When he asked about you, Ben’s dad got so angry. So, we swore to never mention them to anyone and maybe try to find you to give them back once we were old enough.”

Tommy couldn’t do anything besides concentrate on his breathing. He had been told everything that had belonged to his mother—and most of his own things for that matter—had been thrown away when he was forced to move in with his father.

“So, when Ben overheard his mom and Erica argue about you yesterday, he called me, and I snuck over so he could give me his key. And today, after they had all left, I got into the house so I could get the boxes and bring them here.”

“You’re sure it’s all things that belonged to Tommy’s mother?” Evan asked and took Tommy’s hand, lacing their fingers together.

Max shrugged. “I guess.”

There was a short break when their drinks arrived, and Max nearly rejected his own until Evan assured him that they would pay for it.

Then Max picked up where he left off. “I mean, we didn’t look at it again later after we knew you existed. But I think it’s all stuff from your mother, Mr. Kinard.”

“You can call me Tommy.”

Max nodded with a shy smile.

“I don’t understand how those boxes could still exist, how they would have survived the move from LA to here,” Tommy said.

“Ben was born here, so he’s only heard stories about the move,” Max said. “But Charlotte still complains to this day about the strangers who packed up her room back in LA and unpacked it here. When she moved out for college and then back here into her own apartment, she complained about that all over again and refused to let anyone help her pack both times. So, we think they didn’t even know what all was in the attic in LA and just told the movers to put everything from there up in the attic here.”

“That sounds like something I could see my father doing,” Tommy muttered.

“The boxes are in my car,” Max said. “Which is another reason why Ben asked me to bring them here. I already have my driver’s license. And a car. He doesn’t think he is going to get a car. Especially now.”

“How is Ben doing with everything?” Evan asked with a sad smile.

Max shrugged. “It’s never been easy with his parents, but he still loves his dad, right? Ben’s worried they’ll move away now. I hope they’ll wait until Ben is done with school. He shouldn’t have to deal with a new school on top of everything else, but the others won’t care about what’s best for Ben.”

“They wouldn’t?” Tommy asked.

Max shook his head. “It’s always been pretty clear that Ben was an accident. I mean, all his life, he had to listen to his father telling everyone how Johnny is the son he always wanted. And yeah, that’s probably about you, but how could Ben have known that when he didn’t know about you? Also, I think, it’s at least half about Ben, too.”

Evan squeezed Tommy’s hand, though it was really no surprise at all for Tommy that his father had wished he never existed. It was much more disheartening to learn that Ben had had to deal with a similar attitude from his father and possibly even from his mother.

“And his sisters and brother?” Evan asked softly.

“It’s … he is a lot younger than them, right?” Max sighed and waved a hand at Tommy. “I mean, there is obviously not as much of an age gap as there is between you and the rest. How old even are you?”

Tommy chuckled. “I just turned 37.”

Max stared at him wide-eyed. “Wow. Happy late birthday, I guess. Man, you’re old enough to have been Ben’s dad! You’re barely younger than my own parents!” Then he shook his head. “Sorry, that’s … I don’t think we found anything indicating a year in those photos we found. So we were never quite sure how much older you really were.”

Tommy inhaled sharply and stamped down hard on the urge to demand those boxes immediately. Until the day before, he hadn’t had a single picture of his mother left. The one he had gotten from Mason had already thrown him completely off balance, so it felt like a very well-placed blow when Max mentioned even more photographs. But of course, Max had no way of knowing any of that.

“Anyway. Ben is seven years younger than Johnny, and it’s eight years to Charlotte and ten to Erica. They didn’t have much … use for him, I guess. He was too young to be interesting and probably seriously disturbed their family dynamic when they all had been comfortable with the way it was. Ben believes his siblings don’t really care for him, and I’ve seen nothing to contradict that.”

Max inhaled deeply. “So, yeah. I’m really worried about Ben. Charlotte only came back here after college so she could help Mrs. Lombard take care of Mr. Lombard because they all knew his heart was giving out on him. But Charlotte wants to be in New York or LA because she thinks she can have a great career there. Erica has been talking about moving to San Fransico, though. And Johnny is going to law school at Stanford, so that would be much nearer to him. And he is the favorite, even for Charlotte and Erica. Ben said there is a huge inheritance waiting now that his dad has died, but I don’t really understand that. They’ve always been well off, but if his dad had that much money, why didn’t he use it before?”

Tommy raised his brows. “Because it wasn’t our father’s money, it was our grandfather’s. And our grandfather was apparently not very happy about how his son treated the whole situation with my mother and me, so cut him out of his will.”

“Oh.” Max stared at him open-mouthed.

“You’re a good friend to Ben,” Evan said.

Max blushed and ducked his head.

“And he seems to need that,” Evan continued with a sad smile. “It was clear he was uncomfortable in that meeting earlier, and it’s sad to hear that it was about more than his grief for his father.”

Max nodded slowly.

“Do your parents like Ben?” Evan asked, and Tommy frowned at that line of questioning.

“Yeah. We hang out a lot at my place.” Max shrugged. “His parents can’t stand me. Never have. But mine treat him like he is another son. They’ve even straight up told us that.”

“That’s good,” Evan said. “Ben might need that kind of support system. A place where he is safe. His family isn’t going to get what they expect. And Tommy and I can’t know what the fallout from that will be, but what you’ve told us so far makes me worry for Ben.”

Max bit his lip. “They won’t get the inheritance?”

Evan shook his head. “No. That’s what our meeting today was about. I’m sure Ben will tell you everything he learned about it later. But his family isn’t heading into any kind of good time. And what you’ve said so far doesn’t make me hopeful that they’ll remember Ben will need his own kind of support.”

Max lowered his gaze.

Evan leaned forward. “Listen, Max. I grew up with parents whom I’m pretty sure never wanted me either. But I had at least a great sister, much older than me, who took care of me for years. Until she went away for college and suddenly I was alone in that house. What saved me after that was the kind of friend you clearly are for Ben. Talk to your parents and then make sure that all three of you make Ben understand that he always has a place to crash at your house, no matter what happens at his own home.”

“He already knows that,” Max said.

Evan smiled. “Good. He might need it.”

Following an impulse, Tommy said, “Do you have something to write on, Max? Or … I guess you can just save our contacts on your phone. So that Ben can reach out to me if he needs anything.”

Max stared at him wide-eyed. “You’d do that?”

“I know how horrible Colleen can be,” Tommy said. “And I can only hope that she wouldn’t behave the same way with her own child, but I can’t be sure. Mostly because I don’t have any trust in her ability to be a decent human being. Would she check his phone?”

Max nodded in a way that made Tommy believe that had been an issue before.

“Then save my and Evan’s contact information for him, and make him memorize it,” Tommy said.

***

“A picnic on the beach?” Evan asked excitedly, mouth agape as he caught onto Tommy’s surprise.

“Do you remember what you said about watching the ocean last night?” Tommy asked, spreading out the huge beach blanket the hotel had provided, along with the food and drinks for the evening.

When Tommy stood from his crouched position to inspect the blanket, Evan grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him into a kiss. “Thank you. This will be a fantastic way to spend the evening with you!”

Tommy smiled. “I thought so, too. Even asked for a beach not too far away that wouldn’t be all that crowded. I just don’t have much interest in seeing any more of this city.”

“We do have to find something to do tomorrow,” Evan said.

Tommy hummed and pushed Evan toward the blanket. They had gone over a lot of the financial information earlier and learned what Simon Lombard’s estate really included, and how he had made sure the money would be carefully invested over the decades he had expected his inheritance to be frozen. Some of the grief Tommy didn’t want to feel about his father’s death had even returned while Mason had detailed plans that should’ve clearly gone on for two or even three more decades. Despite the fallout between them, Tommy’s grandfather still clearly had had hope his son would live a long, healthy life, and knowing that that hadn’t come true made Tommy sad all over again after he had been so successful in pushing that away.

“We can drive out of the city for a hike,” Tommy suggested as he started to unpack their dinner from the basket.

There was still some paperwork to take care of, even though Tommy hadn’t made a decision yet if he really wanted to accept the inheritance. But even if he didn’t accept it, Simon Lombard had left instructions to ask Tommy to go through the list of charities he had chosen nearly thirty years ago and make adjustments as he saw fit. Mason had already warned him that there were several organizations on the list that didn’t exist anymore, and others that Tommy might not agree with. So even if Tommy turned down the money, he still had to make decisions about the kind of money he had never imagined having to deal with before, not to mention a staggering amount of real estate.

But Mason had other clients to take care of, too, and so he couldn’t meet with them the next day. So they had an entire day to do whatever they liked without dealing with any of the bullshit, despite Tommy wanting to leave San Diego as soon as they possibly could.

“Hiking is a great idea!” Evan agreed with a grin. “I’ve already looked up some trails in the area. There are some that sounded really interesting. As it stands now, we’ll only have two days left for our road trip home anyway.”

“I think we need to postpone any kind of road trip to a later date,” Tommy said hesitantly. He had been looking forward to that part of this non-vacation since their drive down to San Diego, and he hated having to cut those plans. “I don’t want … I wouldn’t feel comfortable leaving the boxes we got today in the car in a parking lot in the middle of nowhere while we’re on a hike.”

Evan looked at him, startled at first, then that turned into a sad smile. “Yeah, of course. Do you want to start going through those boxes when we’re back at the hotel later tonight?”

“No.” Tommy shook his head. “I don’t … I need…” He exhaled slowly. “I want to be home for that. I can’t imagine … I can’t look at my mother’s things anywhere but at home.”

At home, where it was safe. Where it wouldn’t feel quite as much like a dream. Tommy hadn’t even been able to touch the boxes out of a strange apprehension they would disappear when Max had led them to his car so they could take the three boxes up to their room. In the end, they had once more let the hotel staff carry them.

Three boxes, even fairly large ones, felt like nothing compared to what Tommy remembered of his and his mother’s home. At the same time, three boxes still felt like an overwhelming amount compared to the nothing he’d had until the previous day.

“I hate all this fucked up shit with the inheritance,” Tommy said quietly, staring out over the water.

Evan scooted closer, careful not to knock over the food, until they sat with their sides pressed together. He wrapped an arm around Tommy’s waist, and Tommy leaned into the one-armed hug, basking in the warm support of his boyfriend.

“And despite that, now I feel I have to honor my grandfather’s last wishes because without it … Even if it were just that one picture Mason gave us yesterday, that’s still worth more than the millions my grandfather left me. And if we hadn’t needed to come here to deal with this, I might have never gotten Mom’s boxes.”

“Max said he and Ben were going to look for you as soon as they were adults,” Evan said softly.

Tommy shrugged. “Sure. But would they’ve really done that? And if they did, would they have even found me?”

“I think they would’ve found you,” Evan said confidently. “Can you imagine in three or four years, opening your front door to suddenly find a brother you didn’t even knew existed standing in front of you?”

That made Tommy snort in laughter. “No, I can’t imagine that. It would’ve been a mess. I was … very comfortable believing that my father didn’t know where I lived. I hoped he’d never learn I had come back to LA. I don’t think I’d have been very gracious about one of his other kids showing up at home and destroying that belief.”

Evan nodded slowly. “The day after tomorrow, I have an appointment with Dr. Copeland. So we can’t just drive home after that, hopefully last, meeting with Mason. I’ll need the hotel room for the video call. And you’ll be banned from it for that hour.” He made a face. “Maybe a little longer.”

Tommy hummed. It hadn’t been easy to convince Evan to try seeing another therapist after the mess with Dr. Wells. But eventually, he had settled on a therapist he could have virtual meetings with, and over the past six weeks or so he had gotten into a routine of having a weekly appointment with Dr. Copeland. Tommy didn’t know much about what went on in those sessions, and he didn’t need to. He was just proud that Evan had managed to take that step and seemed to have found someone he was getting along with.

“And I’m pretty sure I won’t be in the mood to be stuck in a car for two hours afterwards,” Evan continued. “So we should spend that night here. And then we can drive home the morning after that, once we’ve had breakfast. We would be home in time for lunch and still have a whole other day off before we’re both on shift again.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Tommy agreed with a smile.

“We could watch a movie that last evening here,” Evan said. “So that we’re doing something very low effort. Or maybe we can go see a show. Just getting lost in someone else telling us a story, you know?”

“We can look up what’s playing when we are back at the hotel,” Tommy agreed. “And while you have your appointment with Dr. Copeland, I might try calling my own therapist. Make arrangements to see him a little more regularly again for a little while. I think I’ll need that to deal with … mostly to deal with whatever is in my mom’s boxes, I guess. But the rest, too.”

A part of him was afraid to open those boxes, both his mother’s and his grandfather’s. Tommy knew he hadn’t really dealt with the grief over losing his mother when he had been a child. There really hadn’t been time for him to deal with it, or any kind of safe environment to do it in. He had tried to do that work later, after he had left the Army. But now, he felt all of eleven years old again, overwhelmed with the knowledge that he wouldn’t ever see his mother again, convinced his world wouldn’t ever be whole again.

“I’m glad I’m here with you,” Evan murmured. “That you don’t have to deal with all this alone. And that we are able to take some time to enjoy ourselves, too.”

Tommy nodded and turned his head to kiss Evan’s temple.

“Do you want me there when you open those boxes? Or do you want to be alone for it? Have someone else there with you?”

Tommy exhaled slowly. “I don’t know. I don’t want to do it alone. I know that much. But right at this moment, I don’t want to do it at all. Ask me again when we’re home, okay?”

Evan nodded and smiled reassuringly at him in a way that told Tommy that no matter what answer he gave in the end, there wasn’t a wrong answer here.

“I’m glad you’re here, too,” Tommy said.

Chapter 07

Tommy sat on the bed, his legs crossed at the ankles, and stared out the dark windows while he listened to the ringing of the phone. It didn’t take long for the call to be picked up.

“Tommy!” Hen’s voice sounded worried. “How are you?”

“Hanging in there,” Tommy said. “And I wanted to catch up before Karen accused me of skipping wine night again.”

Hen chuckled. “Karen and I are sitting together right now with a nice glass of wine for me and tea for her. Denny has already been in bed for an hour. Mind if I put you on speaker?”

“Please do,” Tommy agreed.

A moment later, he heard Karen say, “Hey, Tommy. Where is Buck?”

Tommy grinned and leaned his head back, eyes closed. “Hounding the hotel staff for recommendations about where we should go hiking tomorrow. He made a list, and then we couldn’t decide. And I think he is also asking for recommendations about theaters and movie theaters. He’ll probably come back and have the next two days all planned out.”

“I thought you didn’t want to stay that long in San Diego,” Karen said, sounding worried.

“There is a lot to take care of,” Tommy muttered. “More than I had expected. I know Evan already told you who my grandfather was.”

“He did,” Karen agreed. “And I told Hen.”

“We aren’t going to spread that information around, don’t worry,” Hen assured him hurriedly.

“I know,” Tommy said. “I trust you. I’m not going to tell many people, honestly. If I accept the inheritance, I’m definitely not going to tell people about that.”

“You’ll have to tell the LAFD,” Hen said.

“And they’ll keep the information confidential.” Tommy would choose carefully who he would talk to in HR about this whole situation. The careful contacts he had forged there after they got rid of Gerrard would come in handy now once again.

“How are you really doing, Tommy?” Karen asked.

Tommy sighed. “I’d like to go back in time and curse my grandfather. I mean, what kind of crazy person gets the idea to set their estate up in such a way that it’s practically going to be held above your son’s head just out of reach for the rest of his life?”

Karen and Hen laughed.

“Maybe eccentric is a better word than crazy,” Hen suggested.

“Whatever,” Tommy muttered. “I didn’t get an answer about whether they knew about all this or not when they took me in. But it probably made my father and Colleen resent me even more than they already did before.”

“That’s their loss,” Karen said. “Doubly so now. I mean, if they had made sure to have a good relationship with you, they could’ve maybe had an argument to convince you to share with them now.”

Tommy huffed. “Part of me wants to keep the fucking money just so I can rub their noses in it whenever they come to complain about me getting it. They already threatened to sue me for the inheritance.”

Hen sighed. “And what does your lawyer say to that?”

“My grandfather’s lawyer,” Tommy corrected. To his face, Mason was saying all the right things. But Tommy ultimately didn’t trust him. “He assured me that my father had already taken every legal step he could and failed. I’m honestly wondering if I have to keep the inheritance just to make sure I can pay lawyers to keep my Evil Stepmother and her greedy children off my back. Speaking of lawyers: I wanted to ask you, Karen, if you could ask your friend about a recommendation for someone I could hire in LA to help me take care of all this.”

“I’ll ask Tori,” Karen promised without pause. “I’ll have a couple of options ready for you when you come back.”

“That will be three days from now,” Tommy said. “We have another meeting with Mason the day after tomorrow. We’ll stay another night after that and then come home right after breakfast the following day.”

“He couldn’t meet with you tomorrow?”

Tommy shook his head, grinning at Karen’s annoyed tone. “He has other responsibilities to take care of, too. So, Evan and I will go hiking tomorrow. If he can ever decide on a trail.”

Hen laughed. “I think one of the first things our shift learned about Buck is that you have to brace yourself if you let him make any kind of list or give him a clipboard.”

Tommy grinned. “I’m not complaining! Or, I’m not complaining much. He could pick any of them, and we would just leave the rest for a later date. We’re not that far from LA, and there are plenty of places around San Diego where we could get a room for those other hikes.”

“Already planning your next vacation, are you?” Karen asked fondly.

“This isn’t a vacation,” Tommy said with a huff. “It couldn’t be farther away from a vacation.”

“But you are planning a vacation with Buck,” Hen said.

Tommy sighed. “We’ve talked about it a little. It would be nice to go somewhere with him we both wanted to visit. And at a time when we don’t have to take care of other stupid things. Like an unwanted inheritance.”

“Or family you’d prefer not to see,” Hen added.

“Exactly!” Tommy groaned. “I think before we met them it was hard for Evan to understand why I had no interest in any kind of contact with my siblings.”

“And he understands now?” Karen asked.

“He calls Colleen the Evil Stepmother,” Tommy said to his friends’ laughter. “Not that I disagree, of course. Yes, I think Evan understands very well now why I would’ve preferred to never see them again. And now I’ll probably have to deal with them for years, even if I reject the inheritance.”

Hen asked, “What happens if you reject it?”

“It all goes to charities then.” Tommy sighed. “I’m getting the list of those charities from Mason at the next meeting. If I reject the inheritance, I’m allowed to make changes to that list before it’s all donated. I figure I’ll learn more about the kind of person my grandfather was by going through that list than by reading the journals he left behind for me.”

Hen hummed. “It will definitely tell you a lot about him.”

“What would you do in my place?” Tommy asked.

Karen gave out a startled laugh. “That’s not a fair question, Tommy.”

Tommy rubbed a hand over his forehead. “I feel like it’s not a very fair situation I’m in. Honestly, what would you do?”

“Take the inheritance,” Hen said. “Keep as much as we think we’ll need to have a comfortable life. Enough to make sure Denny and one or two more children can get any education they want. Donate the rest. Oh, and of course, set aside something extra to pay for any lawyers needed to keep those annoying relatives away.”

Tommy exhaled slowly. “Okay.”

“That’s what we would do,” Hen continued. “But we aren’t exactly in the same position. We have a son to think of. Hopefully, there will be at least one more child to look out for in the future. Parenthood resets your priorities, Tommy.”

“What was Buck’s answer?” Karen asked.

Tommy shook his head. “I haven’t asked him. But … he asked me about places I’d always wanted to visit. Not that I have any, and I kind of feel like he is holding that against me. He apparently has a list, sorted by continent.”

Hen and Karen laughed loudly, and Hen asked, “Why did he ask about vacation plans?”

“My very first reaction was to tell Mason I didn’t want any of this. But apparently my grandfather made it a stipulation that once I’m told about this, I can’t make any kind of decision about it for a month. So, three and a half weeks from now, I’ll probably have to come down here again to finalize the paperwork for whatever route I’m going to choose.”

Karen chuckled. “Good man. Maybe not quite so crazy after all, huh?”

Tommy huffed. “Anyway, that’s why Evan asked about vacations. He hasn’t really given any opinion other than that he is appalled I don’t have a list of places I want to travel to. Not in so many words, but it was pretty clear what he thought about that.”

“Sounds like you need to make a list,” Hen said.

“Or I’ll just copy Evan’s.”

Hen laughed. “If you say so.”

“I don’t know what I’d do without him here,” Tommy admitted quietly. “I’ve had a couple moments where everything was just too much, you know? The only reason I got through them was that Evan was there and managed them for me. He just knew what I needed.”

“Is that why he is agonizing about the perfect hike for tomorrow?” Karen asked.

Tommy sighed. “I guess. He’s been very focused on making sure I have things that will distract me from my thoughts just circling around my fucked-up family. And that apparently had already started when he booked this ridiculous, overpriced, luxury hotel.” The service the hotel offered was a great support, of course, but that wouldn’t stop Tommy from teasing Evan forever about this ridiculous idea. “I’m not sure he knows how much that helps.”

“Have you told him?” Hen asked.

“I told him I’m glad he is here.”

“But you didn’t tell him exactly what you told us just now,” Karen said.

Tommy groaned. “No. I had planned to. I took him out to a picnic at a beach earlier—very romantic, I might add. It was a great dinner. But it’s been … we were distracted by other topics.”

“Then don’t get distracted again later tonight or tomorrow during your hike,” Hen said, and Tommy swore he could hear her eyes roll. “Men! Talking helps, you know? Being honest, and all that. Let him know his actions are seen and appreciated.”

Tommy rolled his eyes good-naturedly. “I know.”

“Then follow through with it,” Karen said. “It’s pretty obvious how both of you feel about each other, and I know you haven’t talked about it. Do that, Tommy. Hen has argued that it’s not the right time because you have to deal with your family’s bullshit.”

“I still think that,” Hen murmured in the background.

“But I think it’s the perfect time,” Karen continued. “Because none of the assholes you dated in the past would’ve come to San Diego with you, and they especially wouldn’t have freely offered to. Which is why you wouldn’t have asked Evan if he hadn’t made that decision for you, right?”

Tommy sighed. “Yeah.”

“Hold onto this,” Karen said softly. “You’ve been so happy these last few months. I want to see you settle into that. But believe me—and I’m talking from my own experience here—being happy and in love won’t be enough on its own. You both need to put the work in for it, too.”

“This is the strangest intervention I’ve ever had!” Tommy complained. “Especially as I don’t even need one! I think Evan and I are doing pretty great.”

Karen chuckled. “Not an intervention at all. Just a little reminder not to lose sight of the important parts of your life.”

“And that’s not whatever the Evil Stepmother and her spawn do or what your grandfather arranged before his death,” Hen said.

“I hear you,” Tommy said, laughing over everyone using that name for Colleen now. “Thanks.”

***

“Okay, this might have been worth the much too early alarm,” Tommy confessed as they sat at the edge of the trail, enjoying the view while sharing the breakfast the hotel had helpfully packed for them.

It was just after 7 am, and they had left the hotel nearly three hours ago. When Buck had come back to their room the previous evening after a very long conversation with one of the receptionists, Tommy hadn’t been overly excited about the plan Buck had proposed. But he hadn’t complained about getting up far too early, though he had let Buck drive and demonstratively taken a nap during the 40-minute drive to Poway.

“The problem of hiking in the middle of summer in California is the heat,” Buck said. “This way we’re going to be back at the car before the sun gets unbearable.”

“And to do that, we only had to start before the sun was up,” Tommy said with a grin. “When it was still dark even!”

“That’s not true!” Buck protested, laughing. “There were already the first signs of dawn when we started. And it meant we had a great view of the sun rising over the mountains we were headed towards.”

“It was a great hike,” Tommy conceded.

“And we are here all alone,” Buck said. He gestured to the big rock that was known as the Potato Chip Rock. “I heard yesterday that, even with the kind of weather we have right now, there will be a line of people waiting here eventually to take a picture of themselves up there.”

Tommy frowned. “Really?”

Buck nodded. “You can jump over there and then stand on that ledge. We should take pictures of each other before we turn around. I don’t think we’re allowed to claim to have been here without a picture to show for it.”

Tommy grinned. “Maybe we need to wait until someone else shows up so we can have them take a picture of us together.”

“No,” Buck shook his head. “I like having you all to myself. Not sharing you with any other hikers. And it’s, like, a two-hour drive from home. We can drive here one day during fall or winter when the sun doesn’t burn quite so badly to get a picture of us together.”

Tommy watched him with a fond smile for a moment. Then he cupped his hand around the back of Buck’s neck and pulled him in for a kiss. Buck grinned into the kiss, dropped his sandwich—not even caring how good his aim for the paper wrapper was or if it ended up in the dirt—and turned around, climbing into Tommy’s lap without breaking the kiss. It was early, they were all alone, and there wasn’t much of a chance that any other hikers would show up any time soon.

“Hey,” Buck murmured eventually, his arms wrapped loosely around Tommy’s neck, bumping their forehead together.

Tommy smiled warmly. “Hey. I’m really glad you’re here, you know.”

“You already said.”

Tommy shook his head. “Not the way I want to. It’s … I’m … I wouldn’t have managed any of this without you here. I would’ve been so lost without you. If you hadn’t been there to drag me out of the room when Mason gave me the picture of Mom. If you hadn’t been there as a barrier between me and my awful sister. If I hadn’t had the security of you right there by my side, assuring me that I didn’t have to face any of them by myself.”

Buck cupped Tommy’s cheek with one hand, rubbing his thumb over the spot right under his eye. “Thank you for letting me come with you. I thought for a moment there you’d argue with me back home. I didn’t want you to go through this alone.”

Tommy sighed, and there was something in the way he looked at Buck. But he didn’t say anything, just kept watching Buck silently.

“There were relationships in the past where I thought I was in love,” Buck whispered. “And now I’m wondering what that really was. Because it didn’t feel anything like what I’m feeling now with you. I’m so very much in love with you, Tommy. Even if helping you deal with your family’s drama meant going back to Hershey, I’d have come with you.”

Tommy’s breath caught in his throat, and for a moment, he only stared at Buck wide-eyed. Then an impossibly soft smile spread over his face. “I love you, too.”

Buck grinned brightly and leaned his forehead against Tommy’s again.

“It’s a little scary,” Tommy admitted hesitantly.

Buck hummed and kissed first the spot under Tommy’s eye, then the corner of his mouth. “I know. But I’m not leaving.”

Buck didn’t know many details, but he knew that Tommy had had some pretty bad experiences with guys he had dated in the past. It wasn’t the first time Buck saw the lingering effects of those experiences, but it was the first time that Tommy admitted them so openly.

Tommy chuckled. “I’m starting to believe that. Karen and Hen gave me a little lecture yesterday about communication.”

Buck huffed and rolled his eyes in amusement. “I think we’re doing a pretty good job with that so far.”

“Yeah, I think so, too,” Tommy agreed. “But they know that’s not always been the case for me in the past. And I’ve been thinking about your question about places I want to visit.”

Buck frowned a little in surprise. He couldn’t quite follow that change in subject.

“Maybe I have some ideas. But for the most part, I’ve been thinking about exploring those places together with you. Maybe adopting your list and making a lifelong project out of travelling to all those places with you.”

“Oh.” Buck exhaled loudly, then excited laughter bubbled up in his chest. “It’s a long list. It will be a lifelong project if we want to work through it all. I’m not even sure it’s complete yet.”

“We can make adjustments,” Tommy said with a grin.

“As long as it’s our lifelong project.”

Tommy nodded.

“I love that plan,” Buck whispered, and kissed Tommy again.

“Do you have your list somewhere we can access it from here?” Tommy asked. “I mean, not here right now, but back at the hotel?”

Buck nodded. “I’ve got a copy on my laptop. We can drive by the hotel and pick it up. Have a lazy afternoon in some café by the beach or on the beach itself.”

“That sounds perfect,” Tommy said with a soft smile.

They stayed how they were for a little while longer, just enjoying being with each other, but eventually Buck moved to sit beside Tommy again. He had to clean some dirt from his sandwich, but that didn’t hurt their breakfast at all. They fell into a comfortable silence while they watched the morning light spread across the landscape, changing the view from minute to minute. Buck hadn’t often found times where he could just enjoy silence with people, and he was convinced that their ability to be quiet together was part of the reason why everything with Tommy seemed to just fit together so perfectly.

Eventually, they shoved the trash from their breakfast back into their backpacks, took another drink of their water, and started down the track back to Lake Poway. The temperatures would rise soon, and there was nowhere shaded on the trail to take a break, so they wanted to be back long before the sun really started to burn.

“What places have you thought about wanting to see?” Buck asked.

Tommy laughed. “Not many, really. But I was fascinated with the Lord of the Rings movies back when they came out. And that made me curious to see New Zealand. So, if I were pressed to name a place, it would be there.”

“I’ve never seen those,” Buck admitted, which probably wasn’t a surprise at all to Tommy. “I’ve read the books, though. They were good.”

“They made great movies out of it,” Tommy said. “We should watch them when we’re home again.”

“Sure,” Buck agreed readily. “New Zealand is already on my list. But not for any movie locations. Mostly for hiking. But I’m sure we can combine that.”

“Maybe that could be our first destination. Sometime next year.”

Buck grinned. “Good plan.”

For a couple of minutes, they walked in silence, then Tommy asked hesitantly, “You mentioned Hershey earlier. You have no plans to return there for a visit?”

Buck shrugged. “If you wanted to see all the places where I hung out at as a teenager, I might be persuaded. But I don’t have any other reason to return there.”

“Not even to visit your sister?”

Buck swallowed and shook his head. “No. Trying to visit her would mean … Right now, I can pretend, right? That it’s some other stupid reason stopping her from calling me back, not her own decision. But if I go to her and ask, and she tells me…”

“Yeah, fair,” Tommy murmured.

“Do you want to see where I spent my childhood?” Buck asked with a cheeky grin.

“Not if it would be too painful for you,” Tommy said softly and grabbed Buck’s hand for a moment. “Though, when you talked to Max, it sounded like you had left good friends back home.”

“I didn’t leave them,” Buck protested. “We’re still in contact. Plus, Maria and Dante both left Hershey for college anyway, and didn’t move back afterwards. Their parents are still back there, and I’m in regular contact with them, too. Emails, mostly. But there are some phone calls throughout the year, too.”

“Did you spend a lot of time at their homes?” Tommy asked.

“I think I spent as many nights on an air mattress in Dante’s room as I spent at home during high school,” Buck said. “Maria’s parents would’ve been okay with me staying the night at their place, too. And they made sure I knew to come to them should I ever need it. But my own parents … I think the only time they took notice of anything I did was when they learned I had been spending the night at Maria’s place. I was thirteen or fourteen … and Maria’s parents were the ones who had to explain to me what my parents’ problem really was. I was horribly embarrassed to get the sex talk from them.”

Tommy huffed. “Wow.”

“I had to endure it a second time when Dante’s dad started worrying my parents had neglected that, too,” Buck grinned. “I was much less embarrassed with him. Maybe because I had already had it once. Or because he was really great with it. I mean, between Dante and his older brothers, I was the fifth boy he had that talk with.”

Tommy laughed. “Practice makes perfect, no matter what you’re practicing. Sounds like a big family.”

“They are,” Buck agreed. “And from what I hear, they’re giving their parents lots of grandchildren. They used to tell me that, after four, another boy in the house was barely noticeable. I even had my own regular chores at their house.” He frowned. “You know, they’ll probably expect me to bring you home for a proper introduction.”

Tommy chuckled, but he sounded a little worried when he asked, “And they’d be okay with me? With you introducing a male partner?”

Buck threw him a soft look. “They had no problem when I told them about you. I called them a couple of weeks ago for Juanita’s birthday. That’s Dante’s mom.”

“You’ve told them about me, but I haven’t heard anything about them until today?” Tommy asked with a frown.

Buck bit his lip and stopped to turn to him. “I mean, I … don’t really like talking about my family.”

Tommy smiled sadly. “Not even your chosen family?”

“In my head, talking about Hershey means talking about my parents,” Buck murmured, frowning deeply. “Or about Maddie.”

“It could also mean just talking about Maria and Dante and their families,” Tommy said. “I’m not going to ask about your parents. I know enough about them to be sure that they aren’t worth my time. But I’d like to learn more about the people who really raised you.”

“Okay.” Buck exhaled slowly and nodded. “That sounds … I think I can do that.”

“I’m glad you had those friends growing up,” Tommy said. He put a hand on Buck’s arm and, for a moment, the touch lingered in a strange comfort, then he silently guided Buck to keep walking. “And I’m glad that Ben has a friend like that. Colleen doted so much on the other three when I still lived with them, I didn’t think she’d ever treat any of her own children so horribly.”

“Just more proof that it was never about you but about your father and evil stepmother being horrible people,” Buck said and brushed his fingers against Tommy’s hand. The terrain of the track really wasn’t conducive to holding hands while hiking. “I mean, we knew that all along. You were a child, and they had a fucking responsibility to you, and it’s always been their failing that they couldn’t meet that responsibility.”

“I don’t want to feel responsible for Ben,” Tommy murmured.

“But you do.”

“I know it doesn’t matter for any of them, but he is my brother.” Tommy sighed deeply. “I think when we’re back home, I’ll get the name of Hen and Karen’s family lawyer to ask if there is anything I can or should do.”

“It seemed to matter to Ben that you’re his brother.” Buck sent Tommy a warm smile. “I mean, he sent Max before ever even meeting you for the first time to deliver those boxes. Maybe in two years, when his mother can’t dictate anymore who he has contact with, you might be able to get to know him.”

“Maybe,” Tommy agreed. “I wouldn’t send him away if he reached out.”

Chapter 08

Tommy stared at his laptop screen with a frown. He was still convinced that he shouldn’t really like his grandfather—he was the man who’d had a big part in creating his father after all, and there was no question that Nathan Lombard had been a grade-A asshole. Tommy had believed his whole life that his grandparents had to have been the same kind of people, and he didn’t appreciate that conviction being ripped apart piece by piece the more he learned about Simon Lombard.

At the moment, Tommy was going through the list of charities his grandfather had created to distribute his fortune to, should Tommy not accept the inheritance. The final meeting with Mason that morning had been short compared to the others, and without any more big revelations.

If Tommy was honest, he had been joking when he said going through the list would tell him more about his grandfather than anything else. But now that he had it in his hands and started looking up the organizations, he had to admit that there was a lot of truth in the joke. And that truth was sadly just dismantling more and more of his belief that his grandfather had been a horrible person.

“Thomas.”

Tommy was violently startled out of reading about a charity that had supported AIDs patients and research into medications and a cure at a time when most people hadn’t cared one bit for those suffering. He looked up to find Jonathan standing just a couple of feet away, staring at him with the cold eyes of their father.

Tommy closed the laptop with a thud and placed his hands on it as he stood. “I think we’ve said everything there was to say yesterday.”

“We haven’t,” Jonathan said. “We should talk in private. Where is your room?”

“If you want to talk, take a seat,” Tommy said and pointed at the chair on the other side of the table he had chosen in the hotel lounge.

The only reason he was sitting here alone was that Evan needed the hotel room for himself for his appointment with Dr. Copeland. But even if that hadn’t been the case, Tommy would have never invited any of his siblings up into their room. Them showing up at the hotel he hadn’t told them he had checked into was already enough of a breach of his privacy. It was only Charlotte missing now, and he hoped she wouldn’t show up too before Evan and he checked out of the hotel the next morning.

Jonathan glared at him. Tommy met his gaze for just a couple of seconds before he resettled himself and opened the laptop again to continue his reading. He wouldn’t give in to what his brother wanted, and he wouldn’t let him think that Tommy thought him important at all. He could only hope they wouldn’t follow him home, too.

After several minutes, Jonathan finally sat down. “I’m surprised you can afford this hotel on a firefighter’s salary.”

Tommy looked up with a cold grin. “I have a whole inheritance from our grandfather now. I think the bill for this place won’t be anything I’ll have to worry about.”

“It’s not your inheritance,” Jonathan said. “And you know it. You turned your back on this family a long time ago!”

Tommy waved a hand. “We’ve been through this. Your mother said it, Erica said it, now you’ve said it. It doesn’t change reality. If anything, our father turned his back on our grandfather when he chose to support my mother and me over his son. The inheritance was never his or yours.”

“You should at least split it equally among all of us!” Jonathan said.

Tommy cocked his head. “I’d rather give it to people who’ll actually appreciate it. That would also be honoring our grandfather’s wishes.”

“He died before any of us were born,” Jonathan said through gritted teeth. “He didn’t know to plan for us.”

“Wrong,” Tommy said. “He made sure that every single grandchild of his would have an educational trust fund. Something you knew about, didn’t you? Something you’ve been using to go to law school at Stanford, I hear. A trust fund I didn’t know about because our father decided I didn’t deserve it.”

“He was obviously right!” Jonathan hissed. “I might not have known him, but I know our grandfather would be so ashamed to see you show up here with that boytoy you’re dragging around.”

Tommy laughed. “I’m positive that our grandfather wouldn’t have cared at all about me being gay. That’s a hatred our father developed all by himself, one he clearly passed on to all of you. I have the list of charities our grandfather wanted his estate to go to, if I didn’t inherit. One of the first organizations is one in support of the queer community. Considering this list was created in the late ‘80s, that says a lot.”

Jonathan frowned. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“You want to learn about queer history, go buy a couple of books,” Tommy said darkly.

“You could be a little friendlier, don’t you think?”

Tommy laughed mirthlessly. “Like you and the rest of your family are? I’m just matching attitudes.”

“We’re grieving our father,” Jonathan said through clenched teeth. “I don’t expect you to understand that.”

“I understand grieving a parent,” Tommy said. “I don’t particularly grieve him, but I remember very well what it was like losing my mother. I’m not sure how much you’re really grieving for our father, though. The only two people who looked as if they were grieving at all and not just interested in money that only become available because of his death were Charlotte and Benjamin.”

Jonathan sneered. “You have no idea how any of us feel.”

Tommy shrugged. “From what I’ve seen of you, you mostly feel greed. And anger.”

“You are one to talk about greed! You’re stealing our inheritance!”

Tommy shook his head. “If you have nothing new to say, you can leave. Or no, you know what. Feel free to leave, no matter what you have to say. If it was up to me, I’d never see any of you again for the rest of my life.”

Jonathan leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his knees and folding his hands together while staring at Tommy. “You really don’t want to do this the easy and honorable way, do you?”

Tommy couldn’t help but laugh. “Are you trying to be intimidating? You’ll need to take a lot of lessons if you want to be successful.”

“Dad had influential friends,” Jonathan said. “Friends who’ll be all too happy to support us digging up all the dirt you’re trying to hide.”

“Can’t threaten running to Daddy anymore, so now you’re threatening to run to Daddy’s friends?” Tommy asked mockingly. “You need to learn to stand on your own, Johnny.”

“Don’t call me that!” Jonathan snapped.

Tommy shrugged. “Threatening anyone with other people’s oh so big influence is the most entitled and sad behavior I’ve ever encountered, especially in an adult. And I’ve met a lot of entitled people, both in the Army and as a firefighter. So that really says a lot about you, Jonathan. Did our father really let you hide behind his skirts your whole life?”

Jonathan’s face turned red in clear anger, but he didn’t say anything.

“If that’s the case, you’re in for some really dreadful growing pains now,” Tommy said. “I can’t even feel sorry for you. I can only hope you come out on the other side as a better person. You were already named for him; you don’t need to be an exact mirror of him. You should be your own person. A better person than our father ever was, as low as that bar is.”

“Dad was a good man,” Jonathan said through gritted teeth. “Of course, you wouldn’t know anything about being a good man. Or a good son.”

“I’m not going to give you any of the money, no matter how much you whine about it. And definitely not when you insult me,” Tommy said, hoping it would make Jonathan go away.

“I’m not whining!” Johnathan snapped. “You’ll regret stealing our inheritance from us! It won’t be difficult to find dirt about you that could ruin your whole life, will it? You already broke the law joining the Army.”

Tommy couldn’t help himself, he started laughing so loudly that he earned several outraged glares from other people in the lounge. “You really need to brush up on your history lessons. I didn’t break the law. And even if I had joined the Army before DADT, I couldn’t be prosecuted for that now. Go ahead, waste your time and money trying to find something to blackmail me with. If that’s really what you want to do with your life, I’m not going to stop you.”

Jonathan stared at him with a deep frown, and Tommy stared back calmly. Ignoring him hadn’t gotten the point across, telling him outright to leave hadn’t worked either, but Jonathan huffed in outrage less than a minute into Tommy staring him down. He stood and stormed off without another word. Watching him leave, Tommy made a mental note that getting a lawyer who could deal with his family was the first thing he needed to do when he was back home. After the very open, if hilariously useless threats he had just received, Tommy should probably be prepared to take legal action against them sooner rather than later.

After a moment, Tommy turned to the end of the notebook he got to make notes about the charities on his grandfather’s list and made a physical note of that thought. He added another point to find someone who would take care of his finances. He stared at those two points, then started scribbling down anything else that came to mind, ending with half a page full of things he’d need to deal with as soon as he was home.

That complete, Tommy returned to his self-appointed task of checking the organizations on his grandfather’s list. He hoped the list would continue to be as hopeful as it had started out—he really needed to see something good from that side of his family.

Tommy got lost in his research. He had no idea how much time had passed when he was startled out of it by Evan sitting down in the chair right beside him. When Tommy looked up, Evan looked tired and worn out, but he leaned in for a short kiss and then rested his chin on Tommy’s shoulder to peer down at his notebook.

“Reception told me you had another unpleasant visitor,” Evan murmured. “They asked if they should just tell anyone who asked for us that we’d already checked out. I told them to go ahead with that.”

“It wasn’t that unpleasant,” Tommy said. “A little enlightening for me, at least I’m aware now what angle they’ll try to come at me from. And very embarrassing for my brother, but I’m sure he didn’t recognize that. I’m pretty sure now Jonathan’s nickname in school had to have been Draco Malfoy.”

Evan frowned. “What?”

Tommy laughed. “Right, I forgot you don’t get any movie references. And I guess you never read Harry Potter.”

“I did,” Evan murmured. “Oh. Oh! Now I get. That was the kid who always ran to his father, right? It’s been a long time, and I never really got the hype. I probably don’t remember any names except for Harry Potter. And that only because it’s in the title!”

“Jonathan thought it would be a good idea to threaten me with the influence our father’s friends supposedly have.”

Evan snorted. “What kind of threat is that supposed to be?”

“I told him he had every right to be his own person, even if he was named after our father,” Tommy said.

“Maybe he’ll take it to heart,” Evan murmured. “Someone tried to call during my appointment. I called them back when I was done. Turns out, it was Max’s mother.”

Tommy frowned and pulled out his phone, but there were no missed calls he somehow hadn’t noticed.

“She asked if we could have dinner with her and her husband tonight,” Evan continued.

Tommy exhaled slowly. “Why? And we have tickets for the theater.”

Evan hummed. “I told her we had plans. She said they’d be fine meeting either before or after. I think that before makes the most sense. Gives us a reason to leave, too. But if Ben ever needs any kind of support, I think they could be very good allies.”

“So you already agreed?” Tommy asked, amused.

“No. I told her I needed to ask you first, but if she had a recommendation for a dinner place we had to visit before leaving San Diego, she should send me the address. She sent me the address of a Greek restaurant not that far from the theatre.”

Tommy chuckled. “And I suspect you also already agreed upon a time.”

***

“We can still cancel,” Buck said as he watched Tommy and bit his lip.

He felt that he might have caught Tommy a little off guard with this dinner. Buck would understand if Tommy didn’t want to meet Max’s parents. He hadn’t wanted to make it sound like it was already a done deal that they were having dinner with them, but he feared that was how Tommy had taken it. Buck had honestly told Max’s mother that he would need to talk to Tommy first.

“No,” Tommy shook his head and pressed a short kiss against Buck’s lips. Then he put a hand on the small of Buck’s back and turned them toward the restaurant. “It’s a good idea to talk to them. I can start hiding from dealing with anyone here tomorrow once there’s more than one hundred-some miles between them and us again.”

Buck sighed deeply.

“I would have said no if it was really too much,” Tommy promised.

“Okay,” Buck murmured and sent his boyfriend an apologetic smile.

“And maybe learning some more things about my siblings might be good,” Tommy continued. “I’d have called anyone a bold-faced liar who’d told me that a week ago, but I’m a little curious, to be honest. Even if it’s just about Ben, who seems to be the only one of the bunch who isn’t a complete ass.”

“How much do you think that’s because they don’t really treat him all that well?” Buck asked quietly.

“He could still have turned out to be a different kind of asshole,” Tommy said with a shrug. “Or twice the asshole that the rest are. But clearly there are some good genes coming down from our shared grandparents. Maybe my father was the bad apple in the family all along, and what’s going on with the rest of Colleen’s children all comes from her family.”

Buck laughed and nodded. Their conversation stopped as they entered the restaurant and asked for the reservation under Dufour. Buck had only realized that Max hadn’t given them his full name when he had returned the unknown number’s call and his mother had introduced herself.

They were directed to a table where a couple just a little older than Tommy was already waiting for them. The resemblance to Max couldn’t be missed. They both stood and greeted them, introducing themselves as Renée and Henry Dufour. They both wore smiles that looked very guarded, though, and that put Buck a little bit on edge.

“Thank you for meeting us at such short notice,” Henry said. “I understand you plan to leave soon.”

“We could only take off so much time at work,” Tommy said. “We’re going back home tomorrow. I’m a little surprised and startled by your invitation, to be honest.”

Renée nodded slowly. “Max and Ben told us about their ambush. Apparently, you said something to Max about providing Ben with a safety net should anything at home ever go bad.”

“That was me,” Buck said. “We got the impression that Ben might not have the support at home he’ll need to … navigate the next couple of years. Maybe not even enough support to deal with the grief over losing his father.”

Henry looked at Tommy. “Max said you cut contact with the family because you’re gay.”

“I would have cut contact regardless,” Tommy said. “I had never met my father before my mother died, and that was by his choice. When I went to live with them, they didn’t leave any doubt that they really didn’t want me around. But yes, being gay made leaving that house much more urgent.”

Renée sighed. “I want to start by making sure you know that Ben and Max both gave us permission to discuss this with you. Max came out as gay to us a couple months ago. When he did, he told us he wouldn’t come out to anyone else or have any kind of open or serious relationship until Ben was 18 and able to get out of his parents’ house.”

“They aren’t a couple,” Henry added. “We asked, believe me. Ben said he is queer, and all of this is still very new to me, so I don’t really understand what he means by that. But maybe he doesn’t either, yet. They’re best friends. Ben is absolutely convinced his father would’ve turned violent against either him or Max if he had ever learned that neither of them identifies as straight.”

Tommy winced, and Buck settled a hand on his thigh under the table. “I don’t know how much my father might have changed over the last nineteen years. But that is a fear I’m very familiar with. There was a time when I was afraid to even think about maybe, possibly being gay in his house because I thought he might kill me for it. And get away with it.”

Renée paled and reached for her husband’s hand. “I didn’t think … I mean, of course I took his fear seriously as something that he took seriously. But I didn’t think there was a real threat from his family!”

“We had a meeting with Evil Stepmother and all four of her children two days ago,” Buck said, and only noticed his slip-up when Henry looked at him with raised brows and Renée started to laugh.

“Evil Stepmother?” Henry asked, amused.

Tommy sighed deeply.

Buck ducked his head. “Ah, yes. That’s … it’s kind of true, isn’t it? It’s become a little bit of an inside joke to lift Tommy’s spirits while he has to deal with them.”

Renée giggled. “We’ve been dealing with the Lombards for over a decade now. Max and Ben have been inseparable since preschool. It does seem like a fitting nickname. They’re very difficult people.”

“We don’t need to worry about Nathan’s reaction anymore,” Henry said and waved a hand in dismissal. “Which is kind of a horrible thing to say, but also a relief. But what about the rest?”

Buck sighed. “That’s what I wanted to get to before we were derailed. Colleen and her older children made it clear that they have a huge problem with Tommy’s sexuality and our relationship.”

“Jonathan came to talk to me today,” Tommy said. “He basically threatened to blackmail me. He is convinced I broke the law by joining the Army as a gay man, and that he could use that to get me in trouble. But I can’t say if any of them would be a physical threat to Ben or Max because I don’t know them.”

Henry rubbed a hand over his face. “That boy is … It always sat wrong with me how much they doted on him to the detriment of their other children.”

Buck grinned. “Tommy wondered if his classmates called him Draco Malfoy.”

Thankfully, Renée and Henry seemed to be much more familiar with pop culture than Buck had been, because they both started laughing over it immediately. It took a moment for them to calm down, and then a waiter appeared to take their orders. They had to ask him to come back because Buck and Tommy hadn’t even looked at the menu yet.

Once they had ordered, Renée asked, “What did you mean exactly when you told Max we should provide Ben with a safety net?”

Buck bit his lip and frowned down at the table for a moment. “I was referring mostly to my own experience, to be honest. My parents couldn’t really be bothered to even acknowledge me. When I was very young, my sister took care of me. But she left for college when I was ten. My best friends’ families made sure I knew I could always come to them, no matter the time of day, no matter what had happened. At one point, Dante’s parents even gave me a key to their house, and I came and went as I pleased. And I never felt unsafe in my parents’ home, just very unwelcome. But I think Ben might feel very unsafe.”

Renée and Henry shared a look.

“I think he does,” Henry agreed eventually. “I hope he already knows he can always come to us. We told him so yesterday, when Max and Ben came to us to talk about you, Tommy.”

“What did they tell you about me?”

“First, that the rest of your family is trying to steal some kind of inheritance your grandfather left you,” Renée started. “That you went no contact with the family because you’re gay. And that you seemed genuinely concerned about Ben when Max talked to you.”

“I am concerned about Ben,” Tommy said, nodding. “I was concerned after that meeting, seeing how Colleen, Erica, and Jonathan barely seemed to be grieving my father’s death, while Ben was clearly miserable. I think Charlotte might be miserable as well, but it was much more difficult to read her than Ben.”

“I believe she is devastated,” Renée said. “Your father hadn’t been very well off for some time now. He didn’t stop working, despite the stress not being good for his health. From what I know, Charlotte came back home after college mostly as a caretaker for her father.”

“He seems to have been a much better father to the older three…” Henry made a face. “I’m sorry, to the middle three than what we’ve seen from him regarding Ben. Jonathan was without a doubt his favorite, but he really seemed to adore the two girls, too. And Charlotte seemed to be genuinely willing to put her own life on the back burner to give her father the care she felt he needed that her mother wasn’t giving him.”

“Was that how Charlotte felt, or did Colleen really not take care of her husband?” Tommy asked with a frown.

“I think it’s how Charlotte felt,” Renée said. “Ben said that nothing anyone did was ever good enough for his sister. Apparently, Charlotte nearly went to med school because she doubted the competence of her father’s doctors. Ben was glad when their father talked her out of it, because they apparently all knew she’d have been miserable with that choice.”

“Good to know my father wasn’t a complete failure,” Tommy muttered.

“We heard Jonathan is in law school,” Buck said. “Seems like an odd fit from what we’ve seen of him.”

Henry laughed. “It is. I wouldn’t be surprised if he dropped out now that his father isn’t there anymore.”

“Or maybe he’ll become more determined to go through with it, then become one of those smarmy, horrible lawyers who don’t really care about their clients but only about their own bottom line,” Renée said under her breath.

Henry cleared his throat. “Why did you give Max your contact information?”

“So that Ben has a way to reach me should it be necessary,” Tommy said. “When I was his age, I didn’t have anyone I could count on for support. I remember vividly how difficult that time was for me. And for some reason, I feel responsible for him. I’m glad he’s got Max and you to support him, but considering how his mother and our sibling behave, that might not be enough.”

“What could you give Ben that we can’t?” Renée asked.

Buck frowned, though her tone was curious rather than accusatory, like the words had sounded at first.

“When I came here, I was convinced I’d tell the lawyers I didn’t want anything to do with this strange inheritance I had never heard of until I had a PI standing on my doorstep less than a week ago. After having to deal with the Evil Stepmother and her children, I’m convinced that accepting the inheritance is the only self-defense I have. Because they’d try to sue me for the money even if I didn’t inherit and it all went to the charities my grandfather chose. I need the money to keep some lawyers very happy, so I won’t have to deal with my family personally ever again.”

Henry huffed. “Wow.”

“So if Ben needs to get away from his mother and our siblings at any point between now and the time he has a degree and hopefully a secure job, I’m able and very willing to at least provide the money he needs for it,” Tommy said. “And I’ll do my best to provide whatever else he needs if he is willing to accept that.”

“That’s very generous given how you’ve been treated by this family,” Renée said softly.

Tommy shook his head. “Ben had nothing to do with that. And he doesn’t deserve to be treated poorly by them any more than I did. Max said Ben fears the family might move away.”

Henry sighed. “I’m not sure how much foundation there is to that fear. Erica and Charlotte both have jobs here in town. Good jobs, as far as I know.”

“Would you be willing to take Ben in for the last two years of high school if it became necessary?” Buck asked.

It was an idea that had only half formed between him and Tommy while they had been preparing for dinner. Buck had thought from the beginning that Max’s parents reaching out to them showed they cared for Ben, that they worried about their son’s best friend. Tommy hadn’t been so convinced about that, so they had agreed to wait and see what the Dufours were like before bringing up the idea.

“What?” Renée asked, surprised.

Henry inhaled sharply. “I guess that would be a solution for Ben, if the family really did move away before he finished school. At least, if he wanted to stay here rather than go with them.”

Buck nodded. “It would need some legal handling, and we haven’t really looked up anything about it. But it’s a possibility. If you’re open to that idea.”

“I’d take care of any legal fees,” Tommy assured them. “Maybe that’s something you can discuss with Ben. So that he knows he has a choice, no matter what his mother and siblings decide to do.”

“We’ll think about it and discuss it with the boys,” Renée said after a moment. “I hope it won’t be something we have to consider in earnest. Ben’s life has been rattled enough by his father’s death. He doesn’t need a falling out with the rest of his family.”

Chapter 09

Coming home felt like a boulder had been lifted from Tommy’s shoulders. If he ever stepped foot in San Diego again, it would be too soon. Hopefully, he could convince Mason to come up to LA or do everything electronically when the time came to finalize all the paperwork and transfer his duties to whomever Tommy found in LA to take care of this for him.

“You good?” Evan asked when Tommy parked the car in front of his house.

The drive had been mostly quiet at Tommy’s request. He usually loved listening to Evan chatter away about whatever had caught his attention, but this time Tommy had needed some silence. Evan had just hummed quietly in reply to the request, rested his hand on Tommy’s thigh the whole drive, and concentrated on whatever he was reading on his phone.

“Glad to be home again,” Tommy murmured.

Evan grinned. “Yeah, definitely. And we still have half of today and all of tomorrow to enjoy ourselves!”

Tommy chuckled. “Let’s get everything inside first.”

“Sure,” Evan nodded as they got out of the car. “Do you have any plans for what you’d like to do today?”

“Maybe just stay home and do nothing,” Tommy murmured. “Work on the car or something. Order dinner and watch a movie.”

“Sounds perfect,” Evan agreed.

They both grabbed two of the boxes, and then Tommy cursed a little at his lack of foresight when he had to put them down to unlock the door. He should’ve gone and opened the door first, and the fact that Evan was laughing at him didn’t make the situation any better.

“Buck! Tommy!” came a call from inside the house as soon as he opened the door.

Tommy frowned at Hen, who came into the hallway from the kitchen. “Not that I’m not always happy to see you, but what are you doing here?”

“Waiting for you to come home, of course,” Hen said, and the next moment Tommy found himself enveloped in a tight hug. “How are you?”

Tommy huffed but returned the hug. “I wish everyone would just stop asking that!”

“We brought lunch,” Hen said. “Bobby cooked, we just need to reheat it. I hope you’re hungry.”

Karen’s laughter came from the doorway to the kitchen. “Maybe let’s give them time to come home properly, baby.”

“You can help me carry everything inside, Hen,” Evan said with a bemused smile.

He just shrugged when his gaze met Tommy’s, and Tommy took that to mean he hadn’t known about their friends waiting for them either. For a moment, Tommy thought about asking Hen and Karen to leave, because he had really been looking forward to a quiet afternoon where he didn’t have to see anyone but Evan. But now that they were here, Tommy thought that it might be the perfect idea.

Between the four of them, they only needed one additional trip to the car to carry the rest of the boxes and their luggage inside.

“Where’s your car?” Tommy asked with a frown, after he had confirmed that he hadn’t somehow missed the Wilsons’ car parked in front of his house.

“At the shop,” Hen said with a huff. “Bobby dropped us off, and we’re going to take an Uber later. We’re supposed to get it back tomorrow. That is, if they don’t find anything else they think we need to fix other than the brakes.”

“Why didn’t Bobby stay, too?” Evan asked.

Karen gave Tommy a careful look. “He wasn’t sure how welcome he’d be.”

Evan frowned, but Tommy was relieved Bobby hadn’t stuck around. They got along well enough, but he was much more Evan and Hen’s friend than Tommy’s.

“But he sends his regards, and said to call him if you need anything,” Hen continued.

“I’ll remember,” Tommy promised. “And getting a meal prepared by Bobby is always great. But I need a couple more hours before I can eat.”

No one protested the wait, and they ended up all sitting in the living room in short order. Evan had prepared tea for them all with Hen’s help while Tommy had neatly stacked the boxes they had brought up from San Diego in a corner of the living room. He wanted to deal with them soon, and having them right in his line of sight would make sure he couldn’t just conveniently forget about them. But when he chose a place to sit down, he deliberately chose the couch that would put the boxes at his back, and the way Evan looked at him with a soft but sad smile told him he wasn’t very subtle about what he was doing.

“I sent you an email with that list of lawyers you asked for,” Karen said. “Tori sorted them by specialty: family law, estate management, and employment law, just in case, though I don’t think the LAFD will create any problems about an inheritance. And she put down her own name on the list as the only one for criminal law.”

“Criminal law?” Evan asked, sounding as confused as Tommy felt about that addition.

Karen shrugged. “Tori says you should expect them to escalate. Being prepared is your best defense. She expects you to call her at the first sign of trouble.”

“Sure, crush my hopes of ever getting rid of them again,” Tommy muttered and rolled his eyes.

Karen chuckled sadly and sent him an apologetic smile.

“The only way you could get rid of them is by accepting the inheritance and then giving them all of the money,” Evan said with a deep frown. “Every last cent of it. Including your educational trust fund.”

Tommy sighed. “They’d probably also demand interest be paid out for the 25 years or so they had to wait for it. It’s not even an exaggeration at this point when I tell myself I’m going to accept the inheritance as self-defense!” He turned his gaze to Hen and Karen, watching his friends thoughtfully. “I’ve made a decision about some of the things I’ll spend that money on.”

Hen frowned. “Why do you look like we won’t like it?”

Tommy grinned. “Because I know you’ll have a thousand arguments against one very specific plan. The thing is, it will be my decision. When I asked you what you’d do, you said you’d create a trust fund for Denny and any other child that might come along.”

“No!” Karen said firmly.

“Yes,” Tommy said. “Not just for Denny and his future sibling, mind you. I have other very good friends with children, and a stupid amount of money now. Tanika’s kids. Sal and Gina just had their third. Tarek’s got plans for children. Charlie’s daughter. Setting up educational trusts for all of them won’t hurt me.”

Hen shook her head. “You said you didn’t want to tell anyone about the inheritance!”

Tommy nodded slowly. “I think I’ll tell Tarek and Charlie. I can tell Tanika and Sal about the trust fund for my own education that I only learned about now. I can just claim that the fund was set up with so much red tape that money can only be paid out for education, and I want that money to be used for someone’s education after all rather than just let it sit in a bank forever.”

“How much were you thinking?” Karen asked carefully. “I don’t know if we can accept that, Tommy.”

“Accept it for your children,” Tommy said softly. “The money will never be in your hands anyway, so it’s not really you accepting anything for yourself. I don’t know how much yet. I’ll look into how much it costs on average right now to go all the way to get a master’s degree.”

“Tommy, that’s really too much you’re offering here,” Hen said softly.

“Tommy doesn’t need your permission to set this up,” Evan said, and shrugged with a lopsided smile when Tommy turned to look at him. “I just had a two-hour drive to do some research on my phone!”

“I didn’t tell you my idea though,” Tommy said, confused.

Evan grinned. “No. But you did mention that the only reasonable thing your grandfather did was to set up an educational trust for any grandchild that might come around after he was gone. You’ve mentioned that several times, actually. So, it really wasn’t difficult to figure it out.”

Hen and Karen chuckled, and Tommy felt that somehow broke the tension his announcement had brought to the room. He hadn’t looked into setting up any kind of trust funds yet, but he was convinced this was one of the best things he could do with this unexpected inheritance. Tommy knew they’d probably argue again once it came time to set everything up.

“You might set up trust funds for your own kids one day,” Hen said with a deep sigh.

Tommy froze and glanced at Evan. He hadn’t broached that topic with his boyfriend yet, and he didn’t have even the slightest inclination what Evan thought about children. It was very much not a discussion he wanted to have in front of Karen and Hen.

“What’s in those boxes?” Karen asked, and as distractions went, it wasn’t very subtle and maybe not a much better topic. “I’m dead curious, honestly.”

Evan scooted a little closer until their shoulders pressed together as Tommy exhaled sharply.

“Some things from my grandfather. He mentioned some journals, but there seemed to be a lot more than that when we packed up everything at the bank.” Tommy ran his tongue over his lips. “And some boxes with things that probably belonged to my mother.”

“Your grandfather stored those?” Karen asked, surprised.

Tommy shook his head. “No. They somehow ended up in my father’s attic, and I don’t think we’ll ever figure out how that happened. Then they were forgotten, even through the move to San Diego, until Ben went snooping and found them.”

Hen frowned. “Ben’s the youngest of your siblings, right? The one you didn’t know about?”

“And the only one who seems to be turning into a decent human being,” Tommy murmured.

“I bet most of the credit for that goes to Max’s parents,” Evan said.

Tommy laughed. “Yeah. And the rest of the credit goes to himself. I am absolutely sure neither his parents nor any of his siblings contributed anything to that!”

“So, he found those boxes and gave them to you?” Karen asked.

Tommy shrugged and let an amused Evan tell the epic tale of how Ben and his best friend had snuck around the Evil Stepmother and her greedy children to rescue the boxes and get them to Tommy without letting any harm come to them. And Evan was very exaggeratedly insisting that the others would’ve tried to either destroy the boxes or hold them for ransom if they had learned about them. Tommy rolled his eyes at that, even though Evan was probably right with his assessment.

“We haven’t looked at them yet,” Evan finished. “A hotel room just wasn’t the right place for that.”

Karen watched Tommy intently. “Do you want to look at them now?”

Tommy lowered his gaze. “I haven’t had anything of my mother’s since she died,” he whispered. “I have no idea what to do with three boxes of things that once belonged to her. I … Mason gave me a picture of Mom, my grandfather, and me the first day. I already didn’t know how to deal with that.”

“Is there anything you hope might be in there?” Hen asked softly.

Tommy shook his head. “If there was anything of hers that I would’ve liked to keep back then, I’ve forgotten about it now. I finally have a picture of her. After years…” His voice broke, and he had to clear his throat. “After years of coming to terms with the fact that I can’t remember her face, her smile, her voice. I honestly don’t dare to hope for anything more.” Tommy inhaled shakily and didn’t bother to wipe away the tears that were running down his cheeks.

Evan wrapped his arm around Tommy’s waist. “We could look through them for you. Tell you what’s all in there, and you’d never have to look at a single thing you don’t want to.”

“That’s a great idea,” Karen agreed.

Tommy inhaled and exhaled slowly a couple of times. Eventually, he nodded silently.

“You two just stay right where you are,” Hen said and stood.

“It’s the boxes labeled Sonja,” Evan said quietly and hugged Tommy a little tighter.

Tommy swallowed and averted his gaze when Hen returned a moment later and placed a box on the coffee table. He thought he should be happy that he had some things back that had once belonged to his mother. And a part of him was happy. But mostly, he dreaded whatever he might find in there. He dreaded how much it might shatter the picture he had built up of his mother in his head over the years, because he was aware that he had probably changed quite a lot about how and who she had really been. Eventually—when he had finally found a therapist after leaving the Army whom he had been able to trust—Tommy had talked extensively about his grief for his mother, and part of those conversations had been to speculate about how much he misremembered her.

“So, the first thing right on top looks like a scrapbook,” Hen said. “Wow, more like a sketch book. Of clothes. And sketches of sewing patterns with some measures.”

“Mom was a seamstress,” Tommy murmured. He didn’t remember if he had ever told Hen and Karen that. He usually didn’t talk much about his mother. “She worked for the studios in Burbank. She always said that one day she’d make clothes for people to wear, not just for some movies.”

“Do you know what movies she worked on?” Karen asked.

Tommy shook his head and risked a short look at his friends. Hen and Karen were perched on the other sofa, the sketchbook in Hen’s lap, and both of them were looking through it. “Didn’t ask when I could. Never wanted to know later.”

“Your mom really was an artist,” Hen murmured.

Tommy smiled. “Yeah. I remember that. It always looked like magic to me. Sometimes she’d work at home. She had a little setup for her sewing machine in the corner of the living room. I loved watching her. I always hoped the sewing machine wasn’t just thrown away but was given to someone who kept performing that same magic with it.”

Karen stood after a moment, while Hen kept turning the pages of the sketchbook, clearly mesmerized. “Sewing patterns,” Karen said while rummaging through the box. “And more sewing patterns. Fabric samples. Or maybe some scraps left behind after a project. Some finished clothes. And two other sketchbooks at the bottom. I’m just going to write ‘sewing’ on the box right under your mom’s name here, okay, Tommy?”

“Sounds good,” Tommy murmured.

The world hadn’t ended just because they had opened a box, and he felt a little ridiculous about how relieved he felt about that. Of course, there was nothing damning happening just because they opened some old boxes.

“Can I look at those sketchbooks a little closer later?” Hen asked.

“Yeah, sure.” Tommy shrugged.

“Do you know how to sew?” Evan asked curiously.

Hen chuckled. “I dabbled a little when I was a kid. To be honest, I started because the girl I had a massive crush on was super into sewing.”

Karen laughed as she took the sketchbook from her wife and closed the lid of the box. “Were you successful in seducing this girl?”

Hen rolled her eyes. “We were much too young for that. And she never gave me the time of day. But I did enjoy sewing. We could never afford a sewing machine, so I could only do it at school.”

“We can easily afford a sewing machine,” Karen said with a smile. “I guess I know what I’m getting you for Christmas.”

“I don’t have time!” Hen protested.

“You can find time,” Karen said tartly. “And you’re impossible to buy gifts for.” She put the box down beside the couch and got the second box that had “Sonja” written on it. “Okay, let’s see what’s in box number two!”

Tommy couldn’t help but chuckle, and this time he watched as Karen opened the box.

“Oh!” Karen started to grin as soon as she lifted the lid. “Photo albums! A lot of them!”

Tommy swallowed against his suddenly dry throat.

Karen pulled out one photo album and set it down beside Hen, eagerly opening it. Tommy watched them and leaned a little more heavily against Evan. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to see another picture of his mother, no matter how precious every single photo would be.

“Oh my god!” Hen cooed right at the first page. “These are baby photos of you, Tommy! ‘Tommy’s first day home’, with your mom holding you in her arms with the proudest smile!”

Tommy swallowed and stared at them, unable to formulate any words.

“You want to see?” Karen asked softly.

Tommy barely managed to nod.

A moment later, Karen sat on his free side, Hen right beside her, and the photo album rested in Karen’s lap while all four of them stared at the pictures. It really was his mother, holding him as a baby when he was barely a couple of days old. There were other people in several pictures, and whoever had put together the album had been careful enough to at least put first names under every picture.

Over the next couple of hours, things went exactly as Tommy had feared, and at the same time, it wasn’t any of the horror he had expected. He started to remember some of the people in the pictures, started to remember his mother’s friends, and even his own childhood friends that he had long forgotten. Somehow, in his memories, the years with his mother had been as lonely as the years he’d been forced to live with his father, because all he had known for a fact was that his maternal grandparents had abandoned them just the same way his father had—too ashamed of their nineteen-year-old daughter falling pregnant out of wedlock.

But there had been a lot of people in their lives when Tommy had been a child. These pictures only showed a fraction of what their life had been like, of course, but they managed to resurrect memories that reminded Tommy how full of laughter and life and love his days had been back then.

***

Buck puttered around in the kitchen nervously. Everything was ready to either make breakfast or to put everything back into the fridge, depending on how Tommy felt when he came home. Tommy didn’t even know Buck was waiting for him here, but by now Buck had grown sure of his welcome in Tommy’s home even when he hadn’t been explicitly invited.

They had both worked their first shifts since coming back to LA the previous day, but instead of being able to go home, Tommy had an appointment at headquarters right after his shift ended. He needed to declare his inheritance to the department, and he had insisted on doing that as soon as possible. For some reason, he had been nervous about it, so Buck had decided to wait for him at home so he could give Tommy whatever distraction he’d need.

Buck wasn’t nervous about any of that. If Tommy wanted to have time alone instead, he’d say so, and Buck had learned not to feel rejected by it because he knew it wasn’t a rejection. But Buck had gotten a present for Tommy, and he didn’t know if he was overstepping in some way. So for the past fifteen minutes he had waffled back and forth between hiding the present away in his bag again and leaving it on the kitchen table for Tommy to find.

Tommy was a little bit of a mess regarding his family and the memories of his mother that had resurfaced with the boxes Ben had dropped in Tommy’s lap. So much so that Buck had silently rubbed his back in support two days ago when Tommy called the therapist he regularly saw every quarter to request some more frequent appointments as soon as possible.

Buck had just put his present back out on the kitchen table after changing his mind for at least the twentieth time when he heard the door being unlocked. He stared at it for a moment, then left it where it was and turned to the kettle. Whether Tommy wanted to eat something or not, he definitely would want tea.

“Evan?” Tommy called out from the hallway.

“In the kitchen,” Buck answered loudly and opened the cupboard with Tommy’s tea collection, pulling out the cannister with the type Tommy preferred in the morning.

Even months after first discovering the tea collection, Buck still felt a little overwhelmed by it—and a tad skeptical about the need for looseleaf tea if you could just get bagged tea. Just because he couldn’t deny that most of Tommy’s teas tasted much better than any bagged versions he knew of didn’t mean that he thought the effort was really worth it. Which was an opinion he knew better than to share with Tommy because it would only lead to arguments. Of course, he still kept a small stock of Tommy’s preferred teas at his own apartment because they spent an equal amount of nights there as they did in Tommy’s house.

“Did we have a breakfast date I forgot about?” Tommy asked quietly as he greeted Buck by hugging him from behind and kissing the nape of his neck.

“No,” Buck murmured. “I hoped you wouldn’t mind.”

“I’ll never mind finding you in my home like you belong here,” Tommy murmured.

Buck chuckled. “Careful! I might move in and never leave!”

It was a bit of a running gag between them that neither of them really took seriously at the moment. It had started when Buck had still been looking for an apartment of his own, getting more desperate about the situation in his room share with each passing week. At one point, they had talked about eventually moving in together, but Buck felt he needed at least a year or two in his own apartment to have that experience of living alone.

Tommy grinned and kissed his neck again. “There is a whole drawer with your name on it in my bedroom.”

Buck chuckled and turned around to greet Tommy with a proper kiss. “How was your appointment?”

“Okay,” Tommy shrugged. “Nothing to worry about, but I’m glad it’s taken care of. One less stack of paperwork I have to deal with.”

“I got you something,” Buck murmured and nodded toward the kitchen table.

Tommy raised his brows and turned around. “I didn’t forget our six-month anniversary, did I? We haven’t even been together long enough for that!”

Buck laughed. “No. Wait, are we celebrating that? Is that a thing?”

“It can be,” Tommy said and took the small package from the table, turning it in his hands at first without ripping the wrapping paper open. “We don’t have to celebrate six months. But we are going to celebrate our one-year anniversary.”

Buck grinned. “And every yearly anniversary after that.”

Tommy didn’t answer, too focused on the present in his hands as he finally, very carefully peeled open the wrapping paper. Buck watched him, still fascinated by the fact that Tommy opened presents that way. Tommy inhaled sharply when he turned the double picture frame in his hands and stared at the two pictures Buck had chosen to get copies of after they had spent hours going through the photo albums in one of the three boxes Ben had given them.

One of the pictures showed Tommy with his mother on his first day of school. They were both dressed up nicely, and Tommy was practically dwarfed by his backpack. The other picture showed a group of people with Tommy’s mother right in the middle of it. It was a candid shot at some party, and Tommy had been able to name every person in the picture after some contemplation, even though he didn’t remember the party itself.

“Is this okay?” Buck asked softly.

“It’s perfect,” Tommy murmured. He put the frame down with the pictures facing up and turned to pull Buck into a tight hug. “Thank you.”

Buck returned the hug with a smile. “You’re welcome. Something good came out of all of this, despite the heartache and trouble, right?”

Tommy nodded and sighed deeply. “Were you waiting for me with breakfast?”

“Everything is ready to make breakfast if you’re hungry,” Buck murmured. “I had a small snack with Tanika and Hen an hour before the shift ended when we came back from our last call. I could eat, but I don’t really need to for a while.”

“Then let’s just prepare some tea,” Tommy decided and let go of Buck, turning to the kettle and the tea Buck had abandoned halfway through preparing the infuser. “And maybe we can have that conversation we avoided when Hen and Karen were here.”

Buck didn’t even need to think about what Tommy meant. He said carefully, “You didn’t seem very happy about Hen’s suggestion.”

He had noticed how Tommy had tensed beside him when Hen had mentioned the possibility of children of his own, and he had drawn his own conclusions from that reaction. He figured it was the right choice to have an actual conversation, though, instead of assuming what the other person thought about it.

“Do you want to have children?” Tommy asked bluntly as he poured water into the teapot, set the timer, and then turned to Buck with a carefully blank expression.

Buck shrugged. “Not necessarily. I mean, I’ve thought about the possibility sometimes. But not having children is not a deal breaker.”

Tommy smiled hesitantly. “It’s pretty much the other way around for me. I never thought about children. I don’t have any kind of innate desire for fatherhood. But if it happened in whatever way, it wouldn’t be a dealbreaker.”

“In whatever way?” Buck asked, amused.

Tommy shrugged. “There are a surprising number of gay men out there who have children. Dating someone with children was never a problem for me. And when I was … Sometimes I wondered early on if it would be easier to pretend to like women if I had any kind of drive for children.”

Buck made a face. That sounded like a horrible idea that could only lead to trouble.

Tommy waved his hand. “I’ve talked about this before with Karen. And then later with my therapist. I know that wasn’t ever the healthiest thought. So, you wouldn’t want to go out of your way to become a father?”

“No,” Buck shook his head. “I like spending time with kids. Helping them. But I don’t need to be a dad to do that. Also, it’s pretty nice to be able to come home and not have to take care of anything, isn’t it?”

Tommy grinned. “It is.”

Buck held out one hand, and Tommy took it without hesitation. “We’re on the same page here, then. Nothing to worry about.”

“I was a little worried,” Tommy admitted softly and pulled Buck back against his chest. “I have seen you often enough with Denny and a couple of other kids to see how much you … light up while interacting with them. It’s clear that you enjoy that time very much, and every kid you meet seems to just adore you on sight.”

“I thought for a while about becoming a teacher,” Buck said with a lopsided grin. “But I’m pretty sure any kind of classroom setting would’ve ruined me. I have been looking into youth centers around here or near my place, though, to see what kind of support I could offer there.”

Tommy chuckled. “You never mentioned that before!”

Buck shrugged. “It’s just been a thought so far that I’ve been playing with. It’s been a plan all along, but I felt getting through my probie year first would be for the best. And then of course, the whole chaos at the start of the year happened, and dealing with all that has been very distracting.”

The timer for the tea went off, and Buck grumbled a little about Tommy letting him go to turn around and pull the infuser out. He grabbed two mugs from the cupboard and headed for the living room, trusting Tommy to follow him with the teapot.

Tommy didn’t just bring the tea but also the picture frame. He placed the tea on the coffee table and then turned to the bookshelf. He moved the frame around a couple of times before he found a place he seemed to be happy with.

“There is an LGBTQ+ youth center not that far from here,” Tommy said as he sat down beside Buck. “I’ve not been regularly involved there, but I know most of the people working there pretty well. I’ve been thinking about using some of the ridiculous amount of money from my grandfather to set up a scholarship through that place. Half the kids there can’t count on their parents supporting their education because they’re homophobic assholes.”

“You’re very focused on other kids’ education.”

Tommy shrugged and readily leaned into Buck when he wrapped an arm around Tommy’s shoulders. “I keep thinking about where I could be now if I had known about the trust fund,” Tommy whispered.

“And where would that be?” Buck asked quietly.

Tommy shook his head. “I have no idea. I was so focused on surviving the last one or two years under my father’s roof that I didn’t have any kind of dreams for the future. And if I did before that, I … shoved it away in such a way that I can’t remember them now. The Army seemed to be the only option that made sense. It seemed like a safe way to get away fast and with the least trouble, and that would give me some kind of basis to build a life afterwards. Education, some basic funds. I know now that it doesn’t always work out like they promise, but as a teenager, that promise was all I saw. Thankfully, it worked out for me.”

Buck hummed, unsure what to say to that. He hadn’t known what he wanted to do with his life after school either. But it hadn’t been because of the kind of fear he knew Tommy had experienced.

“Don’t get me wrong,” Tommy murmured. “I’m happy where I am now. I have no idea if I’d ever have learned how amazing it was to fly anything if I hadn’t joined the Army or if they hadn’t practically shoved me in that direction, made me get all the education I needed for it. But it would’ve been nice to have a choice, right?”

“Yeah,” Buck agreed softly.

“If I could give other kids that choice, I think that would be the best legacy to leave behind eventually.”

“It would be a great legacy,” Buck agreed.

“You’re going to help me research all of that, right?”

Buck grinned and pressed a kiss to Tommy’s hair. “Of course.”

 

---