Reading Time: 105 Minutes

Title: Time of the Season
Author: Jilly James
Fandom: 9-1-1, SWAT, Code Black
Genre: Contemporary, Crossover, Drama, First Time, Romance
Relationship(s): Evan Buckley/Lou Ransone
Content Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Violence-Graphic. Canon-level violence, Canon-level circumstances, Canon-level angst. Mild character bashing. Explicit Sex. A smidge of kink towards the end.
Author Note: See note tabs on main page for expansion of season 8 canon info, and also full playlist.
Beta: Ladyholder
Word Count: 98,000
Summary: Evan’s trying to get his best friend moving to Texas off his mind. Lou is trying to distract himself from a case that he shouldn’t be working on, even as a case from his past haunts him. They run into each other and spend an evening in easy conversation. That should be the end of it, but talking for them is easy, and when life gets increasingly complex and sometimes disastrous, they turn to one another. In their own way, they each need to let go of the past in order to move forward, and sometimes that’s easier with someone who understands you.
Artist: didbuckygetaplum

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Chapter Thirteen

“This is a dustball.”

Eddie laughed. “You can’t be snobby about West Texas the whole time you’re here.”

“I’ll be snobby in my head the whole time I’m here. I’ll be doubly snobby the whole time you’re living here.”

“Buck.” But there was laughter in his voice there wouldn’t have been a few weeks ago.

They’d stopped overnight, whereas Eddie on his own would have driven straight through and arrived late at night. But even a minimal six hours a day in the car was a lot for Buck, so he was achy and sore and ready for a rest.

“My parents are definitely willing to put you up,” Eddie said as he pulled in front of the Holiday Inn Express.

“Hell no. Not now, not ever. I will not stay with Saruman and Wormtongue even if you pay me.”

Eddie laughed. “They’re not quite that bad.”

“Spawn of Mordor, Eddie. Pretty sure they wear the two rings no one knew about. The ones intended for garden gnomes or something.”

Eddie huffed out another surprised laugh. “Well, Chris will be excited to see you. I’ll try to keep a lid on him for as long as I can so you can take some muscle relaxers and get a good nap, but you better believe we’re having dinner.”

“With Sauron’s minions?”

“I’m not sure I can tell my parents to fuck off on my first night in town.”

“Ugh. Emily Post sucks.”

Eddie grinned. “Come on. I’ll bring up your bags, and then I gotta get the trailer out of here.”

The extra day and a half together had been good overall, but some of the arguments would have brought down the ceiling back home. Still, they sorted out some issues. Many of them were ancient issues that were festering, so they were in an overall better place than they had been when they’d left LA behind them.

Chimney had indeed tried to follow Buck as he’d left Eddie’s place after everyone had gathered in the late morning to say goodbye.

They’d traveled a few miles, made ridiculous and improbable turns, including doubling back on their destination, with an unmarked car following and recording Chim’s path, before Chim had been pulled over. Then Buck and Lou continued on and met up with Eddie.

Chim’s bond conditions did include no contact with Buck, but the judge handling the bond violation hearing apparently felt that following him around didn’t strictly violate the no-contact order, so she didn’t revoke his bond. She did add conditions not to stalk or harass, which were already in the bond conditions, but her added provision was via automobile. Buck found it infuriating. With her kind of reasoning, Chim could get away with it by riding around on a bicycle.

The only two people Buck had heard from on the subject were Lou and Eddie, who were both incandescently furious that the behavior could be seen as anything other than violating the no-contact provisions. But the judge was apparently known for this sort of crap and letting people get away with anything and everything that wasn’t explicit in their bond or probation conditions.

Buck had thought the security precautions were over the top. So to have Chim try to follow him, for some unknown reason, had been like an ice water bath. He had no idea what Chim could possibly have to say or what he might have wanted to do, but now Buck felt like he had to come back and apply for a protective order since the bond conditions were apparently so “vague” that stalking was considered acceptable behavior.

He and Eddie had talked the Chim thing to death, and Eddie got hot about it faster than Buck did, so he avoided bringing up anything else about it as he slid out of the truck.

Buck had a contactless check-in, so he was able to go straight to his room and use his phone as his key. If he needed extra keys, he’d need to present his ID at the desk.

Eddie dropped his bags on the luggage rack and then yanked Buck into a hug. “Have the nap! Chris is going to get demanding, and you’re going to need the rest.”

“Yeah, yeah. Tell Ursula that I’m going to release all the souls she’s enslaved from her secret garden if she gets passive-aggressive with me.”

Eddie grinned. “I dare you to tell her that. I’ll text you about dinner plans.”

“Yep.”

Then Buck was left alone with his thoughts and cellphone that hadn’t had an update in far too long.

He texted Lou that he’d arrived at his hotel safely. Despite it being Saturday, he knew Lou had caught a high-profile missing person’s case in the wee hours of the morning, so he wasn’t expecting an instantaneous response. He got one anyway.

Lou: Enjoy your nap so you’re not tempted to behead the gorgon at dinner. Try to have fun with the people there you actually like. Thanks for the burritos this morning. You don’t need to bribe people to bring me food.

Buck: I do what I want. And people think they owe me favors for the mountains of baked goods I donated to school bake sales at your precinct. If I ask a couple of people who have promised to help me out to get my SO a breakfast burrito then A they’re happy to help me and B they’re happy to have gossip and C you’re fed. See? Everyone wins.

Lou: Are you the source of those lemon cookies that weren’t all that sweet?

Buck: hmm?

Lou: Megan in traffic gave me a couple. Are you the source?

Buck: Oh! Yes. I gave her a bunch of stuff for her daughter’s bake sale at school and she said her mom is diabetic so I experimented with low-sugar and sugar substitutes.

Lou: I NEED LEMON COOKIES, EVAN!

Buck: LMAO. When I get back. I promise. Just lemon?

Lou: I wouldn’t say no to anything lime… just for the record.

Buck: Duly noted you citrus monster! Go find missing people and I will search for missing citrus cookie recipes.

Lou: You’re my favorite person.

Buck: LOL. I see how it is. FOOD.

Lou: If you give me a quinoa bowl and low-sugar lemon cookies, I’m never letting you go!

Buck: Promises promises. Catch the bad guys detective or I’ll be tempted to come back there and force you to make good on your threats!

Lou: You drive me nuts

Lou: Speaking of coming back. When you know your return date, let me know. Hopefully, I won’t be running around in the woods or something and can pick you up at the airport.

Buck: Thanks <3

He dialed Athena next rather than texting.

“Hello, Buckaroo.” A-shift was on duty again, so he knew it would just be her, and from the sounds of traffic in the background, she was either running errands or on shift today.

“You working?”

“Patrolling my territory; keeping an eye on things. Doing what I do. You make it to Texas safely?”

“Just checked into my hotel. I’m texting Bobby now.”

“We don’t have any news for you yet, kiddo, though we do have some ideas. A few in the cooker. One I think will be easiest for everyone involved to live with. Perhaps not justice as I would think of it, but it’s something.”

“Hm. And I’m not asking until there’s something closer to a real plan, right?”

“Right. No matter what happens, we both know the losing parties are going to be you and little Jee-Yun. I wish there were a way to mitigate that. Maddie just isn’t willing to be reasonable. So, we work with what we have. And I’m so damn sorry for that.”

“I know.” He blew out a breath. “I haven’t wanted to ask, but… How’s Hen?”

“Kicking herself in the ass. She wanted to believe so badly in Chimney in the past that she put down some pretty egregious behavior to duress. Things she wouldn’t let slide from anyone else. And now she can’t help but see that he’s always just had a tendency towards aggression and violence. It’s difficult to walk the line between supporting someone as a friend while telling them you won’t support their choices and bad behavior. She’s trying, but she’s a mess. She doesn’t blame you, though. She’s worried you’re going to be furious with her.”

Buck sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. “I’m not. I’m more worn out than anything. I can’t be anyone’s emotional support on this, though. I feel bad about Chimney messing with their friendship, but other than sympathy, I got nothing for her.”

“I know, honey. We’ve got it covered.”

“And Bobby?”

“Oh, he’s still mad. Furious with all of you that he didn’t know that Chimney hit you. And apparently, everyone knew except for him. Well, and me. He’s not going to hold a grudge, but he’s feeling some things he needs to sort through. I’m helping him. Hen was trying to help, but I had to tell her to back off and let others handle it. You are very soft about Hen and Maddie’s feelings, so Bobby probably isn’t wrong to think that Hen’s emotional state was also part of why you were letting Chim get away with so much. And I’m not even asking for an explanation. He’s just upset that everyone let their personal feelings get in the way of their better judgment about what was right for the shift and the station.”

“I feel like I should say something.”

“You really shouldn’t. Bobby’s been trying to figure out who the right person is to train to be the next captain, or even just the second-in-command if he wants a day off. We don’t need Gerrard stepping in again. He’s frustrated and disappointed, and part of that is with himself. Everyone needs time to work through it.”

“But Hen—”

“In retrospect, Hen made poor choices in picking Chim over her obligation to her other responsibilities, and she has a history of it. We all live with our poor choices. It’s moot anyway. He’s making Alyssa Calley his second, and she’ll take the exams to be in line to be captain. The other option was DeKay, but he said he prefers to be the senior engineer and is not remotely interested in riding herd on the station.”

“Oh.”

“Hen doesn’t even seem that torn up about that aspect, so don’t take on. Calley said she wants Hen to take the lieutenant’s exam, though, so Hen will likely be second-in-command, unless she expressly declines. Hen would like to talk to you when you’re ready. I’d suggest talking in person rather than on the phone, but I’ll leave that up to you.”

“Okay. Am I going to need to have a conversation with Bobby about not telling him about the last situation with Chim?”

“Oh yes. Both personal and professional. On the professional side, he needs to know his team is able to get the job done. Putting the personal aside for the sake of work does not mean setting aside a violent assault in the interests of ‘getting along.’ On the personal side, he’s just got some bruised feelings you’re going to have to pet. He feels like you didn’t trust him.”

Buck blew out a breath. “It wasn’t trust. I didn’t want to put him in the position of having to choose.”

“I know. I figured that was why you didn’t loop Bobby in. Hen didn’t say anything to protect Chim. Eddie didn’t say anything because he’s way too codependent with you.”

Buck gave a startled laugh. “Thena.”

“I call the enmeshment like I see it.”

“I love you, you know that?”

“I’m really taken, but I love you too.”

Buck laughed harder.

“Wait to talk to Bobby until you get back—other than your little update texts that make him feel special because he likes to feel thought of. It’s important to let everything settle down and feelings cool off before people talk.”

“I hear you, and I will comply.”

“How are you and tall, dark, and dreamy doing?”

“It’s way too soon to be this convinced I’m in love with him, but there you have it. That’s the hardest part of being away.”

“Hmm. Did you fall this fast for Tommy?”

“Tommy? No. Why? And it was really different. I’ve honestly never felt like this before.”

“How is it different?”

“This is going to sound crazy….”

“I can deal with crazy. Hit me with it.”

“There’s some stuff the same—thinking about him a lot, happy being with him—but I realized I’m not afraid to screw up around Lou. I’ve always been terrified of making mistakes and sending friends or loved ones, especially romantic partners, running for the hills. I don’t worry about that with Lou. We’ve talked about some of our worst qualities, and laughed and groaned over them on both our parts. I don’t know…I just feel like I could screw up and he wouldn’t hold it against me. Maybe that’s naïve this early in the game, but that’s how it feels.”

“Lou is one of the most honest people I know, and one of the things he values in others is honesty. Screwing up is part of life, and he doesn’t tend to hold personal flaws against people, especially if they’re forthright about them and are working on their bullshit. If you’re feeling safe with him, I’d say that it’s not misplaced, but it’s also a good sign about your feelings.” There was a brief pause. “He’s also obviously crazy about you, so there’s that. But enough of this. I see someone I should definitely stop and have a conversation with, so I’m gonna go, baby. Get a nap in before Christopher is there to run your ear off.”

“Will do. Thanks, Athena.”

“Anytime.”

~*~

Buck started to pull back from the hug, but Christopher wasn’t letting go, so he kept hugging even though the position was awkward for his side. Eventually, he had to adjust for the sake of his healing muscles, so he shifted to put his arm around Chris, effectively having him in a side hug.

Eddie was sitting on the edge of the bed in the hotel room, leaving the sofa for Chris and Buck.

“I’m really glad you came,” Chris said, not looking up.

“I’m glad I was able to come along too. I’m eager to see your new home with your dad.”

Eddie shook his head frantically.

What? Buck mouthed.

“I’m not living with Dad yet.”

“Oh.” Buck wrinkled up his nose. “Why?”

Eddie shook his head even more.

Chris shrugged.

“Oof,” Buck said exaggeratedly. “You run off to Texas and start giving non-verbal answers? You’re one of the most articulate people I know. What’s the deal, bud?”

“He hasn’t asked me yet.”

“Wait. What?” came from Eddie, sounding stunned.

Chris looked up. “You didn’t ask. Grandma and Abuelo said you’ll be too busy getting a new job and fixing the house to be my dad right now.” He shrugged one shoulder and looked at his lap.

Eddie’s mouth opened and closed.

“Oh my god!” Buck exploded, making Chris jump. “You two drive me absolutely fucking NUTS.”

Chris stared at him with his mouth hanging open.

He pointed at Chris. “You know your grandmother will try to manipulate you. You know that. You told me yourself that you first became aware of her attempts to twist things when you were four. FOUR, Christopher. And you had distinct memories of her twisting things at that age, which is super early to be aware of adult manipulations. You’ve always been sensitive to her nonsense. And you also know what enablement looks like.

“You yourself came home from your therapy session after you learned what enablement was and told me that your Abuelo enabled your grandmother. I’m not saying they’re hellspawn,” he leaned around Chris and mouthed to Eddie they are, “but you’re not clueless about their worst traits. We all have good and bad traits. Your dad and I just spent two days talking about those aspects in ourselves and how they can come back and bite us in the booty if we’re not careful.

“You’ve always known what a pain in the ass your grandparents are. I’m not saying they don’t have good traits, I’m not saying you can’t love them, but let’s not sit here and pretend that you, Christopher Javier Diaz, don’t already know that your grandmother would lie like a rug to your freaking face if she thought it would keep you living in her house and away from your father.”

Chris stared. Then he burst into tears. Before Eddie could react, Chris had flung himself at Buck, sobbing his heart out, murmuring, “sorry,” over and over.

Buck stroked his hair and hugged him tight, then gestured for a broken-looking Eddie to come closer so he could pass over Eddie’s kid. Because this was Eddie’s emotional storm to resolve, not Buck’s.

When Chris had settled enough, Buck successfully made the transfer of upset teen to broken-hearted father. Chris started crying even harder, so Buck alternated between patting Chris on the back and giving Eddie sympathetic looks.

“I want to live with you again,” Chris finally mumbled into Eddie’s shoulder. “But they make these little comments that sound innocent, but it comes out like you’re mad and won’t forgive me for moving here, and I should give you time to adjust.”

“No,” Eddie said firmly. He held Chris by the arms and pushed him away enough that he could meet his gaze. Buck set a box of tissues on Chris’ lap, and Chris immediately mopped at his face. “I’ll be honest, I messed up. I should have said no to Texas entirely. I know you wanted it, and you called your grandparents, but I’m your dad, and I have complete veto rights over that. You can be mad at me some day for that, whichever way that anger goes, and I’ll accept it.

“But for now, I’ll just say that I should have sent you off to Hector instead. You’d still have been in Southern California, and neither of us would have had to worry about you dealing with my parents. But hindsight won’t do either of us a damn bit of good today. We’ll deal with picking that apart some other time. For today, all that matters is that you are my son, not theirs. You go where I say you can go. If that’s with me or them or Hector or Buck or whoever, you live where I give permission for you to live. Your grandparents don’t get a vote.

“I’ve let this situation ride because I thought you were happy, and that’s the only reason. I’m here in El Paso to be your father up close because I can’t be your dad over Zoom and FaceTime anymore. If you were adamant about a slow integration back into the house with me, I’d accept that for now. If you want to move in immediately, that’s fine. What isn’t fine is never moving back in at all.”

“But they said—”

“Just tell me what you want,” Eddie interjected. “Because my parents clearly have only a passing relationship with the truth, and so whatever they’ve passed on to you is likely to just frustrate me.”

“I want to live with you again.”

“Then we’ll make that happen.” Eddie pulled Chris in for another hug. “The house is a fixer-upper, though, so we might have to go do an assessment.”

“I used to work construction,” Buck offered.

“You have a hole in you,” Eddie said dryly.

Buck waved that off. “Yes, but I can assess what needs to be done, make lists, and help you find some assistance. Plus, I can steal your truck and go to Home Depot. We prioritize the rooms, starting with the bathroom, kitchen, and places to sleep, and we’ll have Casa Diaz the Coolest ready in no time.”

Eddie smiled, though it looked both tired and strained. “I’d like that.”

“Me too,” Chris said, cuddling up to Eddie. Then he bit his lip. “Are you really okay?”

“Me?” Buck asked, bewildered.

“You were shot a little over a week ago, right? I’m sorry I didn’t call. I felt so bad for not being there. I just sat in my room and cried when I heard, and then Grandma told me I was being childish.”

Buck groaned. “Please stop giving me reasons to dislike your grandmother. We’re having dinner with her.” He made a face, and Chris laughed. “But I’m fine. See?” He lifted his shirt and showed the small healing incision on the front. He no longer even needed to cover it, and there were no stitches to see since most of what was left were the dissolving type. It was the injury on his back that was the hot mess, and he didn’t plan to show that to Chris.

Chris reached out and very carefully touched the edges of the wound. “Take your shirt off around Abuelo. He’ll feel inadequate and get weird, and then Grandma will cry.”

Buck dropped his shirt because he was laughing. “I’ve missed you, you little twerp.”

Chris shifted away from Eddie and folded into Buck’s side. “Missed you too. I’m sorry I’ve been so weird. I don’t know what’s going on with me half the time.”

“That’s okay. Being mysterious, even to ourselves, is part of growing up. Just give yourself room to admit it and move forward.”

“Yeah.” He looked back at Eddie. “We’ve got time before dinner. Can we go see the new house? I want to pick out my room.”

Eddie grinned broadly. “I’d love that.”

Chapter Fourteen

“Buck, enough with the lists,” Eddie said, sounding tired as they neared the elder Diazes’ home.

“Dad, don’t mess with Buck’s clipboard mojo. It’s sacred.”

“Thank you, Christopher. Finally, someone on my side.”

“I’m on the clipboard’s side, Buck.”

“The burn.” Buck clutched his heart, but made just a few more notes as his phone began to vibrate with an incoming text.

Lou: Can you think of anything I could put on the radio for an uncomfortable car ride with 5 people with very different musical tastes, including Captain Maynard?

Buck thought for a second, then fired back.

Buck: I Keep Forgettin’ by Michael McDonald?

Lou: Hmm. I’ll try anything. Will let you know!

Buck: If you need a second song Baby Come Back by Player

He got a thumbs-up reaction to the last text

“Something up?” Eddie asked.

“Just Lou asking for something to put on the radio for a specific occasion.”

“He asked you?”

Chris laughed. “Buck knows a lot about music.”

Eddie looked over his shoulder in the back seat at his kid. “He does?” He looked at Buck. “You do?”

Chris laughed harder. “You’re so funny, Dad. I’ve missed you.”

Eddie lit up with pleasure. “I’ve missed you too.”

Chris sobered. “Before we go in, can I ask about that lady who looked like Mom?”

Eddie froze.

Buck sighed and turned sideways so he could see Chris. “I swear a vow on my iTunes catalog to let you and your dad sort this stuff out going forward, but I’m going to help facilitate communication on this one because I think it’s difficult for Eddie to talk about.

“He ran into a woman on the street one day who looked a lot like your mother, except for different types of clothes and a different hair color. Her name is Kim. I think he was understandably a little freaked out, but also a little excited too.”

“Why excited?”

“I mean, they say we all have a doppelganger, right? What would a doppelganger of Shannon be like? Would she be like her, nothing like her, would she be like you? I personally don’t think it was meant to be anything, but seeing her showed him how unresolved his feelings were about your mom’s death, you know?”

Chris nodded fervently.

“So, one day, she shows up at the fire station to bring something to Eddie, and I saw her and realized something was up and went to talk to him. And he decided he wasn’t going to see her anymore, but rather get some assistance from someone qualified to help him with his unresolved feelings for Shannon, because no matter what she looked like, Kim isn’t Shannon. Kim definitely isn’t the right person to help someone with their grief.”

“Right. So, how did she wind up at the house?”

“He met her, not at the house, to tell her why he’d been a little weird with her. I think the weird bit was probably a little come closer but go away. You know? Sort of like, I want to talk to you, but don’t get too close, let’s be friends, but let’s not. Mixed messages because he was confused about what he was seeing versus what his heart was telling him.”

Eddie’s hands were white knuckled around the steering wheel, even as Chris was nodding along.

“Anyway, he explained about Shannon and how Kim looked like her and how the situation had come to be. He said he couldn’t see her anymore and said goodbye.” Any other details weren’t really for kids and weren’t relevant. “Then she just showed up at the house. She had changed her hair and her clothes to match the photo Eddie had shown her of Shannon.”

“She was trying to help,” Eddie said stiffly. “She wanted to give me the chance to say the goodbye that I never got with the real Shannon.”

“Dad,” Chris whispered, sounding crushed. “That’s so creepy. You tell some lady in a reasonable way ‘goodbye’ and then she changes her hair and clothes and shows up at your house uninvited and pretends to be your dead wife?” Chris’ gaze flicked to Buck. “Really?”

Buck nodded. “My guess is that the lines of reality started to blur a little.”

“Ugh. Oh, that is so gross.” He frowned. “So, you weren’t having an affair with her?”

“Affair?” Eddie repeated, sounding confused.

“Grandma said—” He cut himself off at a sharp look from Buck. “Okay, never mind. We don’t talk about Grandma. But we do need to talk about her strange obsession with half-truths used to manipulate and control others.”

“I wasn’t entirely faithful to Marisol,” Eddie admitted. “I’d tell her I was meeting a friend for lunch, and I’d be meeting Kim for lunch instead.”

“So, were you sleeping with her or not?” Chris asked bluntly.

“No, of course not. I wouldn’t cheat on Marisol.”

“Did you kiss Kim?”

“No.”

“So, you just hugged her?”

“Yes.”

Chris scrunched up his nose and looked at Buck. “I’m not sure I understand what being faithful is.”

“Me either, buddy. But your dad’s definition apparently has every guy who has lied to his wife about going to the gym when he was really going to a sports bar for wings and a beer as an unfaithful louse.”

“Buck!” Eddie sounded indignant.

“What? Make up your mind, dude. You’ve got a mini-you in the back seat who is coming into his own about ethics in relationships, and you just said that lying about where you are is cheating on your partner. I’m not saying lying is acceptable, but there’s a difference between lying and cheating.”

“I mean, it’s not—” Eddie rubbed his hands over his face. “I guess it felt unfaithful because Marisol would see it that way, and I felt, in a way, like I was with my wife.”

“You weren’t with Mom,” Chris said firmly. “But did you have any intention of cheating on Marisol?” Chris pressed.

“No.”

Chris threw up his hands. “No need to say anything else. I see you’ve been talking to Grandma.”

“Mijo!”

“What? You’re not making sense. Crazy lady stalks you, and you should have said something to someone about seeing someone who looked like Mom, but I’ll admit, I’d have probably kept that to myself too—sorry, but I would have—you never intended to cheat, you never actually cheated, and yet Grandma keeps yelling at you about cheating. I’m so done! Everyone is lying in this family!”

“Who is lying to who?” Eddie asked, sounding bewildered.

“We’re all lying to ourselves!” Chris yelled indignantly. “Let’s go have this stupid dinner where Grandma and Abuelo are going to be passive-aggressive AF, and then we’re all getting therapy!”

“Are you allowed to swear if it’s in initials?”

“I’ve decided that I am. I’m a whole teenager now.”

Eddie looked at Buck. “Do you have anything to say?”

Buck held up his hands. “Not my circus, not my monkey.”

Eddie pointed at Chris. “That is absolutely your monkey.”

Chris started snickering.

Eddie sighed.

Buck bit his lip.

“I don’t even know what’s happening anymore,” Eddie said, sounding tired, “but let’s go make my mother’s whole week.”

~*~

Dinner was tense after Chris cheerfully announced he was moving in with Eddie starting tomorrow.

The protests had flown fast and hard from both elder Diazes, but Chris had remained calm and unruffled and just asked Buck to, “Please pass the potatoes.”

Buck’s phone vibrated, and he checked it to find it was his parents. “Parental units.” He made a face.

“Joy,” Chris said. “Are the nightmares really still alive?”

Eddie’s eyes widened.

Helena choked.

Ramon dropped his fork.

Buck wasn’t all that surprised and fought back his smile. The teenage years had hit Christopher like a runaway train, but he’d never liked Buck’s parents. He just used to try to be nice about it.

Deciding it would either up the tension or stop it, he answered and put it on speaker. “Greetings, this is the Evan Buckley Life Model Decoy. Please leave your message at the beep. And please be frivolous. All important information will be ignored.” He hesitated and looked at Chris, holding out his phone. “Make a beep sound, would you?”

Chris gamely went, “BEEEEEP.”

“Evan.” Margaret Buckley’s voice came over the line.

“Buck,” he corrected.

“What did you do to your sister?”

“Did I do something to my sister? I’m pretty sure I’m in Thailand. How could I have done anything to her from here?”

“You went to Thailand with everything your sister is going through?”

“Non-refundable airfare waits for no man. Did you need something, or were you just calling to check on my travel plans?”

“You need to drop the charges against Maddie.”

Charges? Chris mouthed to him.

Tell you later, he exaggeratedly mouthed back.

“Okay,” he agreed for his mother’s benefit.

“That’s it. Just okay?”

“I never really had any intention of pursuing charges against her for stealing my keys. She was way wrong, not that this family is going to stand up for the dude who was in a coma who had his keys stolen, but pursuing it legally would be petty. You can bet your Volvo, however, that I’m pursuing it personally. Now, what else are you demanding of the child you never talk to?”

“She needs to be getting on with her life after the trauma she’s endured. Drop this nonsense with Howard as well.”

“No.”

“I don’t think I made myself clear.”

“I think you were perfectly clear. The connection is sound, and your English grammar and sentence construction have always been decent. I understood you fine. And ‘no’ is a complete sentence and a final response. Anything else?”

“Evan!”

“Don’t disrespect your mother,” Philip chimed in.

“My answer is final and firm, and I really have nothing else to say.”

“If you do this,” Margaret said, obviously seething, “we will completely cut you off. There will be no more chances for you, you ungrateful little brat. You were always too much, Evan. Always grasping and—”

“Well, finally something good to come out of a serial killer targeting us! I’m blocking you, then, so you don’t have to worry about changing your mind. Bye!” He hung up and blocked both his parents. “Good grief. What narcissistic assholes. Sorry about that.” He slid his phone into his pocket and focused on Chris. “Questions?”

“Serial killer?” His eyes were wide.

Buck nodded.

Chris swallowed. “Okay. That’s new news. I’m taking it in. They’re in custody, right? Not getting out?”

“She’s already back in Washington with the FBI.”

“And you’re fine?”

Buck nodded. “Would I have been on clipboard patrol if I wasn’t fine?”

“This was entirely inappropriate—” Helena began seething.

“Grandma!” Chris shouted. “Buck has been my friend for years. He’s helped me more than you can understand. I already knew about him being shot, I already knew his parents were terrible human beings, I already knew most of it! There are bits I don’t understand, but you just don’t like not being in control, and you really don’t like it when someone doesn’t treat me like a baby.”

“Be respectful to your grandmother,” Ramon said gently.

Chris pursed his lips but nodded. “I apologize, Grandma, but respect is both ways, and you’ve been misleading me about Dad and my circumstances since I moved in, which doesn’t feel very respectful. Please don’t disrespect my friendships to my face, saying I’m too young for stuff I already know, and then get upset when you think I’m not polite enough.”

Helena’s mouth seemed stuck in the open position.

Chris leaned forward and braced his elbows on the table. “I knew a lot of the worst of that, but there are still some things I don’t get. But why answer on speaker?”

Buck looked right at Ramon. “Because I know what my parents are like, and I know they’re incapable of being decent for five seconds. But I know, for all your manipulations and enablement and little games, that you two actually love your kids and grandkids. But little lies can be just as hard to deal with and just as toxic as that kind of behavior. I only put up with my parents because of my sister. I don’t have that incentive anymore.

“Your kids all love you, despite the many complaints I’ve heard from all of them about how they hate feeling so manipulated by you. You have an opportunity to turn a corner. Only you can decide what you’ll do with it.”

Ramon’s brow was furrowed. “I know very little about what happened in LA.”

“There was a serial killer who tried to take my sister. We only knew after the fact about the person’s intentions. My sister was knocked unconscious in the abduction attempt. I arrived just in time to see her unconscious in her home, and that’s when I was shot.”

Ramon nodded. “Why would your parents be angry about that?”

“I haven’t wanted to discuss the ins and outs of what I went through yet because it was difficult, and it doesn’t relate to my sister in any way. But my sister was angry that I wouldn’t tell her about what the killer did to me.”

Ramon’s brows shot up.

“So I wrote it all down and had Athena Grant take it to my sister and sit with her while she read it. In some ways, it was petty.”

“Giving her exactly what she asked for?” Ramon guessed.

“Yes. But I’d been verbally eviscerated for not helping her, and I was fed up. Especially since I doubted it would help her. But I wanted Athena to judge if it would help, and Athena thought it was appropriate as long as she had some emotional support, which is why Athena was there. But Maddie’s boyfriend just saw her upset and decided to get revenge.”

Chris sputtered. “Chim attacked you again?!”

Buck shot him an incredulous look.

“I’m not stupid; I knew all along who gave you that black eye when Maddie ran away.”

Buck sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. “Teenagers are way too much work. Take the monkey back, Eddie. I want a refund.”

Eddie snorted.

“I’m serious, Buck,” Chris insisted. “This isn’t okay.”

“I know, Buddy. And this is why I wouldn’t let you see my back, okay? My back got bruised up when Chimney banged me into the wall, but your dad was there to rescue me, all right? And I called the police this time.”

“Good!”

“May I read it?” Ramon suddenly asked.

Buck didn’t track. “Pardon?”

“This accounting of events that happened. May I read it?”

Not sure why Ramon would want that, but not having any particular reason to deny him, Buck pulled out his phone again. Still, he hesitated.

“I won’t discuss it without your permission,” Ramon assured.

Buck frowned but passed over the phone after he’d pulled up the app with the file open.

“Can I read it?” Chris asked.

“No,” Buck said quickly. “And before you get to thinking it’s about your age or something, I’m not letting Bobby read it either.”

Chris cocked his head to the side and considered, then nodded. “I get it.”

“Do you?”

“I think so. It’s enough that you told me and that you’re not treating me like I’m a junior ranger.”

“Hey! Junior rangers are great. I get a stamp in my National Parks passport whenever I can!”

“Oh my god, Buck. You’re so embarrassing.” But Chris was smiling as he chewed idly on some dinner rolls Helena had provided with the meal.

“May I read as well?” Helena asked politely, looking subdued and thoughtful.

Ramon looked up, his expression disturbed, but obviously deferring to Buck. Buck nodded.

Helena slid closer to Ramon and read over his shoulder.

“Do I get to read this?” Eddie asked where he had his head braced on his hand, idly stirring his tea as if he’d poured sugar in it, which was something he never did.

“No,” Ramon said as he kept reading. “Don’t read this, mijo. Be content knowing your friend is safe and unharmed.”

Eddie’s eyebrows shot up.

Ramon handed the phone back as Helena suddenly got to her feet. “I’m going to get dessert ready. Excuse me.”

Eddie looked startled by his mother’s sudden departure.

Chris was taking everything in. “If no one close to you should read what you went through, why give it to your sister?”

Buck blew out a breath. “Because she asked over and over and was sure she needed it. She was so sure she was right that hearing what happened to me would help her, that she refused to listen when I said I’d prefer not to talk about it. I really don’t think that has any chance of helping her, but ultimately, it’s what she asked me to provide her.” On the grounds that he owed her. “I don’t know that there are any answers to be found in any of this except that life is terrible sometimes.”

“And your parents are the worst,” Chris said firmly.

“True.”

“Are you really done with them?”

Buck nodded. “I’d have never talked to them again if it weren’t for Maddie, and I don’t see how we move forward from the mess we’re in now.”

“But families have to fix things, right?”

Buck gave a mirthless laugh. “Yeah, Superman. But long before there are police involved, bond conditions with no-contact orders, and potential felony charges. And if Chimney goes to jail, Maddie may never talk to me again. It’s just a mess.”

Chris stared at his grandfather and then pointed his fork. “We have stuff to fix.”

Ramon blinked a few times. “Okay.”

“I’m tired of Grandma misleading me. I already knew she did it—since I was a little kid, I knew she twisted the truth—but you enable her. It makes me not trust you, even though you’re one of my favorite family members. I’d really, really like to be able to trust you and want to spend time with you, but mostly I want to get away and be with Dad because I know I can trust him.”

“Christopher…” Ramon cleared his throat, eyes glassy. “Yes, you are right. We have things to work on, and we will. The older you get with a habit, the harder they are to break. Please be patient with us, okay?”

“There have to be reminders, though. Nothing ever gets done if we’re just being patient, waiting for things to happen. I’ve decided Dad and I are going to use fixing this house as a metaphor for fixing relationships and communication. You and Grandma might as well be along for the ride.”

“Do I get to help fix the house too?” Ramon asked gently.

“Yes,” Chris said firmly. “But not Grandma. She’s a nightmare with a paintbrush. I mean, she can come along and watch us literally paint, but she’ll have to be content with being involved with the metaphorical part and not actually fix anything because otherwise Dad might go broke getting paint out of electrical outlets.”

Ramon sighed. “Tell me about it. I left her alone for five minutes in the craft room, and the places she got paint…”

“I want to go with Dad tonight.”

“He’s staying here, I thought, and you two were going to the new house tomorrow…?”

“We need some bonding time.” Chris nodded firmly. “Can we go to Buck’s hotel?”

Eddie looked more than a little dazed as Chris completely took over his life, future therapy, and construction schedule. “Yeah, of course. Let me check if there’s another room available.”

Buck waved it off. “My room is a double. I’ll just see if they have a cot available.” He pushed back and slowly got to his feet.

“You sure, Buck?” Eddie asked, looking concerned.

“What do you think I’m going to do with two beds by myself?”

“I meant, you might want some time alone. You’ve been kind of crowded with people lately.”

Buck made a dismissive gesture. “I’ll have opportunities. Think of all the supply runs you have to do while Mr. Wizard is at school.” He ruffled Chris’ hair on his way past, getting Chris flapping his hands in protest.

He ventured into the kitchen and found Helena with her hands braced on the counter. “Are you all right?”

She nodded, not looking up. “I just want what’s best for them.”

Buck hesitated. “I know, but what you think is best may not be what they think is best, and everyone is allowed to make their own mistakes in life.”

She gave a watery laugh. “True.”

“Trying to force their hand with little manipulations here or there may seem harmless, but it fosters resentment. They want to love you without those resentments, which is as much as anyone could ask for, I think.”

She turned around and met his gaze, her eyes were bloodshot. “Your mother sounded very cold.”

“She is. I could go weeks without seeing her when I was a child. She’d leave food and money. Sometimes we’d be in the same house, but I still wouldn’t see her.”

“How old were you?”

“I remember as far back as that going on when I was seven or eight, but it never stopped. She was never attentive. There’s a stark difference between wanting your children, even if you want them too much, and not wanting them at all. Don’t compare yourself to Margaret.”

Helena frowned. “I do want what’s best for my children.”

“Mm. Maybe focus more on the strategic and not the tactical.”

“I don’t follow…?”

“You’re focused on what they should do. Maybe it’s about how they should do it. Are they emotionally healthy, are they well adjusted, do they cope with setbacks well, do they handle conflict with ease. There are so many skills we just don’t learn properly anymore, especially in childhood, and we must learn them from therapists, coworkers, or lovers…. You’re so focused on what they should be doing, and I just wonder if you’ve looked at how they got where they are?

“Do you know what a good man Eddie is? How admired and respected by his coworkers he is? What a good father he is, and I know from good fathers. How loving and attentive he is. That he’s also a good friend. And it can’t be overstated how valuable it is that he’s a good neighbor and community member.

“I know Sophia is beloved by her boyfriend’s coworkers, her employees think she walks on water, her condo association keeps trying to make her president even though she says she doesn’t have time, and she’s super good with pets. That yappy little rescue she has hates everyone on sight except her, though I think he’s warming up to Don finally.

“There’s so much there to be proud of. Yet, with all the things they do right, and how they do them and interact with the world, they hear from you that they are doing things wrong.”

She looked near tears.

“I’m sorry; I’m not trying to make you miserable. I just really like your kids; they’re admirable human beings, and I think it’d be great for them and you if you could see that too.”

Suddenly, she was hugging him, and he had to fight back a wince of pain. He gamely patted her on the back. “You okay?”

“Thank you for telling me those things. I have a lot to think about.” She sniffled and pulled away. “Please tell Ramon to enjoy his Scotch. I’ll bring dessert in about twenty minutes.” Then she was out of the kitchen.

Buck blew out a breath and called the hotel and asked for a rollaway to be delivered to his room.

Just before he went back to the dining room, he noticed a text from Lou.

Lou: You’re the best. Perfect choice. Everyone was chilled out, singing, and wiggling in the car. Even Maynard. Who knew she was a Michael McDonald fan? Player went over just as well. Thanks.

Buck: Anytime. 70s/80s yacht rock is the solution to any tense car ride.

Lou: I need a playlist.

Buck: I’ll make you one. One “Tense Car Ride” playlist coming up.

Lou: Please name it something more subtle.

Buck: Ruby Slippers?

There was a long pause, and Buck was just about to walk back to the dining room when he got a reply.

Lou: I snorted my coffee up my nose. Go be sociable. I have to clean my desk.

Buck: Back behind the curtain I go!

~*~

“Quit glaring at that clipboard,” Eddie ordered as he finished patching a section of the ceiling that needed repair. They’d been at the business of repairing the new Diaz home for nearly a week. They’d arrived last Saturday, and it was now Friday. Chris still had school during the days, so it left Eddie and Buck to continue to spend the days together.

They could have kept trying to talk about stuff, but they seemed to have hit their limit on talking, especially with Christopher’s need for nightly deep dives into the tangled morass of the family psyche, so they just drank beer and fixed the parts of the house that were beyond what Chris could handle.

He knew his Diazes would love it if he found a reason to stay in El Paso forever, but he needed to get back home.

Buck put the clipboard down and got to his feet. “We’re ahead of schedule.”

“Oh no.”

“Sorry, man. Extended Diaz family therapy is a go.”

“Christopher is so militant when he gets a bug up his butt. How’d he get this way?” He shot a glare at Buck.

“Are you seriously blaming me for him being this way?”

“This is totally on you. There is no part of my influence that is going to cause him to work up a construction plan that has milestones that have therapy goals.”

Buck opened his mouth to protest, but he wasn’t even sure what to say. “I’m going to find a way to refute this. Eventually.”

“Uh-huh.” Eddie flopped down on the other end of the sofa. It was the only living room furniture, which was kept covered in a drop cloth during the day. “We’re going to miss the hell out of you when you go back home. And I have a hunch that’s soon, huh?”

“Not sure, but I’d think so. The update with Athena is in…” he glanced at his watch, “five more minutes. And, really, no matter what they say, I have to go home soon.”

After three days of work with Ramon and Helena’s help, they were able to move all three of them into the house. The bathroom was completely done. The kitchen needed some minor stuff and new paint, but it was functional. The master bedroom could now be occupied thanks to their ceiling repairs, but it would need to be cleared out later to have the floors refinished and the walls repainted.

Buck had intended to sleep on the sofa, but Eddie had insisted that Buck take the bed, considering his injuries. In the end, they just shared the bed, as they’d often done in a variety of circumstances. It had also allowed Eddie to micromanage Buck’s injury recovery and wound care, which had been annoying as fuck.

Buck had just started to feel closer to normal physically in the last few days. As long as he was careful how he moved, didn’t lift anything heavy, and kept good posture, he was pretty close to pain-free. Though it was easy to do something stupid, twist wrong, forget he wasn’t supposed to lift over twenty pounds at this stage, or something else, and make himself hurt.

His help with the Diaz house had been a lot of moving stuff, organizing, instructing Chris, and also taping things off, as long as he didn’t have to bend over too much. He could also do some painting with his right hand, provided he kept the strokes short, even, and didn’t twist. They learned quickly how to adapt, and Chris was the master at teaching adaptation strategies to work around a physical limitation.

“I hate the reason,” Eddie said, “but I’m not sad you came.”

“I’m not mad about it either.”

“I don’t think we’d have made such quick progress, me and Chris, without you here to tell us both off.”

Buck chuckled. “I told myself I was going to stop doing that, and then it was practically the first thing I did.”

“We needed it. He needed it more than me, even, I think.” Eddie blew out a breath. “I can tell he’s holding on to guilt about something, and I think Carla was right that his choice to come here was to lash out at me.”

Buck nodded. “Probably.”

“I don’t know how to ask about that.”

“I don’t know. It’s rough. If you’re comfortable with the family therapist, I’d talk to them privately about it and see what they say.”

Eddie nodded. “Confronting it before he’s ready will be rough. Because I think part of his gung-ho work on the house here is overcompensating for his guilt.”

“Possibly. Or he could have just really missed you. Both even.”

“Yeah.” Eddie scrubbed his hand over his face. “Lord, my parents. Personality transplant.”

“Keep pushing, man. See if you can make it work.”

Eddie laughed. “I’m not even sure I wanted that. But I suspect you’re right about something else, that when it’s all said and done, I’ll be selling the place here and coming back to LA. I think we’ll make a nice profit on the house, which will set us up to finally buy in LA.”

“That’ll be nice.”

“Yeah.” Eddie’s smile was bittersweet. “Maybe things happen for a reason or maybe we just make the most of the crap life throws at us, but whatever it is, I’m just glad we’re better off than we were.” Eddie’s phone vibrated, and he stared for a long time at the incoming text message.

“Something up?”

“That contact you hooked me up with.” He blew out a breath. “They’re willing to give me a trial run starting next Friday. It’s a 48/96 department.” Eddie ran his hands through his hair. The job with El Paso Fire had fallen through due to funding cuts, and Eddie was considering doing deliveries or being a ride-share driver when Buck had suggested hooking up with a wilderness SAR unit. Eddie didn’t have quite enough SAR certifications, but he was damn close, and Buck actually knew the Chief for West Texas as he used to be in New Mexico when Buck was working with FEMA.

“You’ll do fine, Eds. You only didn’t pick up the certifications on the job because Bobby never pushed you to, but you have the skills they’re looking for. I think you only lack two of their mandatories, and you’ll be able to prove practical knowledge; you can pick up the training in the months to come. Plus combat medic is a huge bonus for them because they’re often working in the middle of freaking nowhere.”

“The shifts sound like a lot.”

“It’s a tough schedule. It’s what I worked in Colorado, and not uncommon at remote postings because people often drive in from farther away, so they don’t mind two on, four off.”

Eddie nodded. “The pay is certainly better, and despite my missing two certifications, they give a pay bump for my medic skills. I think it’s a two-hour drive.”

“Sounds about right. You and Chris talked about this being a little more of a commitment than regular firefighting, right?”

“Yeah, he knows I won’t be able to get home easily if there’s an emergency, but I’ll have more time at home at a stretch. He’s good with it. He’s even good with two days a week with his grandparents now that he’s bossing everyone around about personal growth.”

Buck laughed. “You guys are going to be fine.”

Eddie leaned over—a long way over since he was at the far end of the couch—and bumped Buck’s shoulder. “Call Athena. Let’s find out if you’re okay.”

Taking a steadying breath, Buck dialed the number.

“Hey, Buckaroo. You have Eddie there with you?”

“Right here,” Eddie greeted. “Hey, Athena.”

“Hi, boys,” Bobby said. “Having fun?”

“Loads,” Buck said dryly. “My hair is prematurely white from plaster dust.”

“You brought home the stray, Buck, don’t expect me to feel sorry for you when he requires more care and feeding than expected.”

Eddie squawked in indignation, and Buck sputtered. “I’m pretty sure it was you who brought home the stray, Cap.”

“Oh. Right. Never mind. Carry on.”

“It’s just Bobby and I for today,” Athena began, “and I’m going to get right to it so I can steal my man for an evening out since we both have Friday night off. Buck, this is all informal for now, but with help from a lot of people—at a short list: Lou, Hen, Karen, Josh, Sue, Captain Maynard, ADA Lief, the Lees, Albert, Chief Kramer—we have a tentative plan. There’s no saying this is the way it will go. Even if you agree, it could still fall apart for a variety of reasons.”

“Just net it out, Athena. That list of people made my head spin.”

“The LAFD is done with Chimney, and dispatch is done with Maddie. Even if all charges are dropped, they’re not keeping their jobs. In Maddie’s case, it gets complicated for them to terminate her, but I’ve been assured by Sue that she’s out one way or the other. One of the keys she had was Sue’s, which was a key she was supposed to return, not copy and then return.”

Buck winced. What the hell was Maddie thinking? Why would she assume she was allowed to make copies of people’s keys without their permission? She probably had some narrative in her own mind about how it was for emergencies only, and how she was trustworthy enough. But for fuck’s sake…

“If everything goes well, and everyone agrees, Chim will plead no contest to one count of simple battery, which is a misdemeanor. He’ll receive a three-month sentence under a deferred adjudication deal, which is really so probation can keep an eye on him for the duration of time it takes for the rest of the plan to go off.

“All charges against Maddie will go away. Chim will have a paramedic position waiting for him in Seattle. Normally, the legal issues would be frowned on by Seattle, but Chief Kramer assured her contact up there that his legal issues will be completely finished and off his record by the time he’s signing his paperwork thanks to the deferred adjudication deal. And departments are known to overlook the occasional misdemeanor conviction when warranted, anyway, depending on the nature of the crime.

“Maddie can apply for whatever work she likes. The department never gives references anyway, simply confirms employment history, so she’ll be able to apply to dispatch in Seattle if she wishes. Sue won’t be a personal or professional reference for her, but Josh is willing to provide both as long as Maddie doesn’t push the boundaries with him.

“It’s currently part of Chimney’s bond conditions that he must stay away from you, but it will also be part of his probation conditions. Whether to seek a restraining order on top of that will be up to you.”

“The bond conditions didn’t do a lot of good before when he tried to follow Buck out of town,” Eddie remarked.

“I’m aware. A judicial misconduct complaint was filed, and it turns out she’s had upwards of fifty complaints filed about loose interpretations of other judges’ bond conditions, specifically around the issue of no-contact orders, which has allowed victims of crimes to be harassed and stalked. Other judges have even filed misconduct complaints. Your case may have been the tipping point for the commission to take up the case and decide if censure is necessary because she has a hearing set and isn’t allowed to hear any cases regarding violation of probation or bond conditions in the interim.

“In any case, the ADA is very aware of the last judge’s screwup and will be sure the probation terms are spelled out in minute details, right down to not even looking at your social media pages. It’s still up to you if you want to pursue the TRO.”

Buck wasn’t even sure how to respond.

Eddie gave him a concerned look, then said, “Buck seems a little frozen. Does this seem…fair, Athena?”

“It’s not justice by any means, not as I would think of it, but we knew charges against Maddie were never going anywhere, so pursuing that is just a waste of time. The issue is really Chimney. Buck, honey, you said it yourself that this mess was probably going to cost you the relationship you’d worked so hard to build with Maddie, whether Chimney was convicted or not. It seemed the best way to ensure everyone had the best chance of going forward was complete separation.

“I wasn’t sure if this was the right course with Chimney but, in the end, I wasn’t sure I saw you following through on charges and going toe-to-toe with your sister in court every day over her husband being charged with felony-level battery.”

“No, you’re right,” Buck finally managed. “I’m not mad about Chim’s consequences or whatever. I honestly don’t care. I feel like I’ve got a lifetime of exhaustion weighing down on me with Chim’s name on it. I’m willing to let it go if I never have to see him again.

“It’s just hard… Maddie and Jee-Yun. I’d already run through every scenario I could think of and couldn’t come up with one where I still got to see my niece.” He stopped and bit his lip, eyes feeling hot and wet. “It’s a good solution, and I know that, but I’m just struggling a little.”

“Of course you are, baby. I’m truly sorry. Is there anything you disagree with?”

“No. They should start over if they can.”

“Like I said, this is the optimal situation we’re going to try to make happen, assuming Chim cooperates.”

“Can I ask why Seattle?”

“Similar pay bracket to LA. A little less, but the cost of living is also a little lower. And Chief Kramer has a contact in the Seattle FD who is helping make this happen.”

“I see.”

“Also, I understand from Albert that the Lees are considering a move to Whidbey Island, so there’s an emotional tie for Chim that might be in the area, which will help them get settled.”

Buck whistled lowly. “Nice area. I’ve got no complaints, Thena. I assume the three-month community control is to give them time to sort themselves out and whatever?”

“It might be more than three months. It’s three months after we grind through to the point he can enter a plea. That could be three to four weeks from now. But the ADA and the Chief calling in the favor to Seattle FD want to be sure they’re not banking on a horse with worse impulse control problems than they realize. They want to be sure Chim can stay away from you, the 118, etc. If he can’t, he’ll lose the deferred, wind up doing three months in jail here, and the misdemeanor will be on his record. Very few FDs will take him at that point. This is literally his last chance.”

“I understand.”

“Anything other questions?”

“No.”

“Maddie would really like to talk to you before she agrees to push this with Chim.”

Buck dropped his head in his hands. “Why? No, never mind. Whatever she’s told you likely won’t even be true.” He blew out a breath. “I’ll talk to her soon-ish, but will you please tell her I have no authority in this deal-making going on. They do what they want in terms of mitigating their consequences, and if they don’t like the deal presented, that Chim can face a felony charge. My give a fuck is broken.”

“I can absolutely give her some very tough love before you talk. That said, it’s okay to come home.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. The ADA put the fear of eternal jail time into Chim if he contacts you, so he’s learned his lesson. I truly believe that.”

“Okay.”

“Also, I’ve considered carefully whether to reveal this to you, but you did put the ball in my court.”

“Oh?”

“Tommy passed some information on to me about how he came to some erroneous conclusions about you and your commitment to your prior relationship. He said you didn’t want to know who had been gossiping to him, but to tell me in case it became relevant.”

Buck frowned. “Yeah.”

“It was Chim and Maddie, but he gave it credence because of Maddie’s involvement in the discussion. It was apparently framed a lot like a joke, but the whole thing apparently put him off and made him doubt that you could be sincere about a relationship with a man, particularly the first man you’d been with.”

Buck dropped his head and rubbed the back of his neck. “I mean, I knew it had to be Chim, Hen, or Maddie. I really didn’t want to know if it was Hen for work reasons, and I didn’t want to know if it was Maddie for personal reasons, but you’re right, that it’s better that I just know all the painful things now.”

“Does it change how you feel about the breakup?” Athena asked gently.

“No,” Buck said firmly. “Tommy was in a relationship with me, we’d talked about toxic family members and unhealthy, codependent relationship dynamics, and yet he chose to believe Chim and Maddie over his own personal experiences of being with me. Without knowing who had given him information, I was clear with Tommy on my assessment of how shitty I thought it was that he believed gossip over his own experiences of being with me.”

“Well, that’s fair. And I’m glad to hear it. It redeemed him a smidge in my eyes, just from the perspective that I think your sister unintentionally sabotaged your relationship, but he should have listened to you, not gossip.”

“I get where you were going with this, Athena,” Buck said tiredly. “Even without this mess, there might not be any fixing the Maddie situation because she refuses to see anything she does as a problem.”

“Right. Sorry, hon.”

“It is what it is. Anything else we need to deal with?”

“Buck?” Bobby’s voice came over. “Alonzo wants to know if you’re ready to start at the Academy on Monday.”

“I don’t see why not. I’ll catch a flight home on Sunday morning.”

“You be sure to let Lou know,” Athena teased. “I’m sure he’ll pick you up.”

Buck sighed. “I can Uber.”

“That man wants to see you, sunshine. Tell him when your flight arrives. Now, unless you have questions, we’re going to have a little nap and then go out for our night of fun.”

“Thanks, both of you. Have fun tonight.”

“We will!” The line clicked off.

Buck looked at Eddie. “Did ‘nap’ sound dirty to you?”

“So, so dirty. I’m not thinking about it.”

“Right!”

~*~

Buck held Christopher tight to him as they stood in the loading zone at the El Paso airport. His two bags had been checked since he couldn’t even handle the weight of his usual carry-on.

“Remember, I’m just a phone call away. I think for both our sanity, having a regular call on the days you have to be with your grandparents is a good thing.”

Chris nodded into his shoulder. “I’m going to miss you.”

“I miss you too. Every day. Never think I don’t feel it even if I don’t say. Sometimes I don’t say the words because I don’t want you to feel pressured as you’re figuring out your place in the world, but I keep sending messages to know you’re never far from my thoughts.”

Chris nodded again. “We never talked too much about the new boyfriend.”

“It’s still new.”

“Yeah. We should definitely talk about it in front of Grandma.”

“Your newfound desire to troll your grandmother is horrifying but also endearing.”

Chris laughed and pulled back, wiping at his eyes. “I love you, Buck.”

“Love you too, Christopher. No matter how the shape of our family changes or what directions it goes,” he tapped the center of Christopher’s chest, “the feelings remain.”

“Yeah.”

Buck opened the door to the pickup and waited for Chris to get in before closing it, then he turned to face Eddie, who had his hands jammed into his pockets.

Eddie gave him a crooked grin. “We’ve had way too many goodbyes lately.”

“It’s like the universe is screaming not to,” Buck said with a grin.

“The universe doesn’t scream. Nevertheless, I can take a hint. No goodbyes, just see you later.”

Buck pulled Eddie into a hug, getting a firm squeeze in return. “See you later, Eds. Take care of each other.”

“Yeah. And you take care of yourself as well as you take care of us, okay?”

Buck nodded and let go.

Chapter Fifteen

Lou had Evan’s SUV, at Evan’s request, and inched along in the arrivals pickup lane to where Evan had said he was waiting. He spotted Evan easily when he was still a good ten cars away. Evan looked relaxed as he leaned against a pillar, doing something on his phone.

Then Lou was there, hopping out to grab the bags. As soon as he pressed the button to close the tailgate, he gave a startled, “Oof,” as a firm body collided with his and strong arms held him in a tight embrace.

Chuckling, Lou held him tight. “I missed you too.”

Evan pressed his face against Lou’s collarbone. “I missed you more. You smell good.”

“I just smell like me. I was tidying the house and appeasing my cat because I haven’t been giving him enough attention this week.”

Evan pulled away with obvious reluctance. “If I weren’t still recovering a bit, there’d be the whole dramatic jumping on you and squeezing with both arms and legs.”

Lou laughed. “I don’t mind being squeezed by your legs, but let’s save that for when we’re horizontal; I’m not a firefighter. And I think you’ve got a few more weeks of muscle healing before you’re going to be jumping on anything.”

Evan wrinkled his nose. “Abdominal injuries are very annoying.”

“They certainly put a damper on your activities. Come on, let’s get out of here before traffic gets worse.” As soon as they were in the car, Lou asked, “Yours or mine?”

“If it’s an option, definitely yours.”

Lou smiled. “It’s an option. I’d like to get started on this serious dating business if you’re game.”

“Absolutely.”

“At home date or go out date?”

“If it’s one or the other, absolutely at home, but don’t you live close to MJ’s? I think you said that…?”

“Yes, neighborhood bar. We can hit up MJ’s. First or second?”

Evan shrugged. “Whichever. Or not at all. We can play it by ear, and if we want to go out, we plan to go there, and if we’re happy at your place, we stay in.”

“I can work with that.”

Evan grinned and bounced a little in the seat.

“How are you feeling?”

“You mean the abdomen and back?”

“Mm hm.”

“Back is still colorful and sore, but I’ve had worse on a bad shift, to be honest. If I’m careful about how I move and lift, I don’t have any pain. So, it’s improved a lot. How’s work been?”

“More normal caseload the last week. I had to fight my team for the cookies.” Lou shot Evan a dirty look. “You sent them to the station!”

Evan laughed. “I wanted you to know I was thinking of you.”

“We texted every day.”

“Don’t front. You liked the cookies.” Evan ran his fingertips over the back of Lou’s hand on the gearshift, tracing the patterns of bones and tendons.

“I loved them. But more than that, I loved how much you obviously had me on your mind. I’m selfish enough about your attention to want you thinking of me.”

“I couldn’t stop myself. And then I needed some one-on-one time with Helena’s kitchen to remind her to chill the fuck out and stop being so controlling, so I thought I’d make you cookies and overnight them.”

Lou moved his hand, turning it palm up on the center console, offering it if Evan wanted to hold his hand.

Evan shot him a look. “That’s okay?”

“Of course. You’re always welcome to hold my hand.”

Evan smiled gently and took Lou’s hand, briefly leaning down to rest his cheek on the back of their joined hands. “I missed you a lot. More than I even wanted to.”

“You didn’t want to miss me?”

“I wanted to just be normal… Not so eager for stuff to get resolved so I could come home and be with you.”

“Was it hard to say goodbye?”

“Yeah. It’s walking away from something unresolved. Chris is holding back on stuff, and Helena is like five percent reformed.”

“Five percent?” Lou repeated, laughing.

“She’s a tough nut. She keeps saying the right things and legitimately trying, but her manipulative tendencies are so deeply ingrained that it will take dedication on the part of her family to call her out on it every single time, and receptiveness on her part to hear it. I’m not sure either will exists. Time will tell.”

“What else isn’t finished?”

“I dunno.”

“You and Eddie?”

“Eh. We’re fine. We gave up on talking serious shit after the weekend. I think we were burned out on reliving our greatest tragic moments and talking about what we did wrong. Mostly our talking was focused on Chris.” He shot Lou a quick look. “You sure us having to bunk up didn’t bother you? You said it was fine in text, but I know it would freak some people out.”

Lou shook his head. “I think anyone who freaks out about friends sharing a bed hasn’t been in the military, police, fire service, or any other type of job where you sleep where you can, and if you’re given the option of sleeping on a bed with another person or on the hard floor, you shake the hand of the stranger, find out his name is Steve, and go to bed with gratitude.”

Evan laughed. “Okay.”

“So, you’re doing good with leaving?”

Evan blew out a long breath. “I think so, but it’s…life, yeah? Walking out in the middle feels weird.” He hesitated. “It was hard because it felt like the remnants of my life, like the life I thought I wanted.”

Lou nodded, hearing some of the sources of anxiety he’d been wrestling with this week but not expressing. He’d known he had to let Evan have his time with two people who were a huge pull on him, and trust Evan wouldn’t want to stay.

“It was so familiar that it was eerie. It would have been so easy to slip back into that life, you know? Living with or practically living with Chris and Eddie, playing family.” Evan shook his head. “It almost ached living through it some days.”

“Were you tempted to stay?”

“No. It’s not my life anymore. It hasn’t been for a while now; I just held on to the memory of it longer than I should have. I can’t say my life is permanently in LA, but right now, we find ourselves on the same road.”

Lou frowned. “What would take you away from LA?”

“Ask me again when we get to the house.”

Lou looked over briefly, finding Evan’s expression relaxed, so he nodded. “Okay.” He squeezed Evan’s hand. “I sent your ruby slippers playlist to Maynard. She apparently plays it all the time.”

Evan laughed. “Big fan of yacht rock?”

“Apparently. Though you have more than strictly yacht rock on it. The vibe is very chill. Nice work.”

They chatted about work, especially what Lou could reveal of his cases over the week, as they drove the last twenty minutes to Lou’s house.

As soon as they were inside the house, Albert King made himself known, winding around Lou’s legs. “I was just here, you monster. You are not being neglected.”

“Wow. He’s beautiful.” Evan went over to the sofa and sat down, staring at Albert. “What is he, about eighteen pounds?”

“A full twenty, so no picking him up for you. Monster, this is Evan Buckley. I call him Evan, but you’ll have to obtain permission to be so informal. Evan, this is Albert King.”

Evan looked up sharply, then he laughed. “Oh ho. I see how it is. Naming your cat after the second best.”

“Best.”

Evan winked at Albert. “I’m gonna get a cat one of these days and name him Double Trouble just to fuck with your human.”

Lou burst out laughing. To his surprise, Albert leapt up onto the sofa and walked up to Evan, peering at him curiously.

“Hello, gorgeous,” Evan cooed, offering his hand for Albert to sniff, then engaging in firm head rub, especially focusing on his cheeks and under chin, which Albert adored. Next thing he knew, Albert had climbed into Evan’s lap, flopped onto his back, and spread himself out into what Hondo called ‘dead body pose.’

“What is he doing?” Evan sounded alarmed.

“He is doing something I’ve never seen him do with a stranger. He usually only lets me and Hondo do this.” He passed over Albert’s brush. “He wants his belly brushed.”

“Oh, does he?”

“He’s very demanding about it. I guess he’s heard us on the phone enough that he’s become familiar with your voice.”

Evan’s lips pressed into a thin line of obvious amusement before he began brushing Albert’s belly. Then Evan leaned down a bit and said, “I need advice on how to get away with this. I want to flop on Lou’s lap and demand belly rubs.”

Lou choked. When he’d stopped coughing, Albert was purring and Evan was laughing. He glared at his significant other. “You don’t need tips on how to get me to pet you. Just cuddle up and I promise you’ll get petted.”

“See, Albert King? You’re my good luck charm. Even if it pains me that your name isn’t SRV.”

“SRV is second best.”

“Oh my god. I can’t even with your silliness. But at least you didn’t say something ridiculous like…Joe Bonamassa. That’d just be embarrassing.”

Lou laughed and sighed. “It’s barely past lunchtime, so we’ve got a while till dinner. Did you eat lunch, or should we get something? And then there’s the question of dinner. Go out, order in…?”

“I could cook.”

Lou blinked. “You want to cook…?”

“It doesn’t have to be anything complicated. I could see if there’s anything viable from what’s in the kitchen.”

“How about whatever you’d prefer. Tonight’s a date, and it feels—”

“Great,” Evan said with a big grin. “I’ll have a look around the kitchen, and if we need to, we can order in.”

“Okay…. If anything isn’t what you want to do, please tell me.”

“I promise.” After a beat, Evan said. “I think…he’s asleep.”

“The little hedonist. He’ll fall right to sleep if he gets the brushing he wants. Let me go get the lint roller you absolutely will need, and then I’ll move him.”

A few minutes later, Albert King was curled up in his cat bed, and Evan had gotten the bulk of the cream-colored fur off his slacks.

Lou took the seat next to him on the sofa this time. “You want to look at the kitchen? Or you said to ask you again about what might take you away from LA?”

Evan stared at him for a long time, then he got to his feet and stood in front of Lou, their knees actually touching. “I think I can do this without a problem. It’s all a matter of how I hold my upper body.”

“What do you mean?” But next thing he knew, he had Evan straddling his lap, sitting back on his thighs, hands resting on Lou’s shoulders. “Oh…” Lou felt like the breath had been punched out of him. “Are you all right?”

“Mm-hm. All in keeping the abs firm. No twisting.” Evan smiled, expression loose. “So many things run around in my head, you know? And I don’t want to scare you with how things don’t always come out of my brain in the right order.”

“We’ve talked about this. You don’t have to communicate perfectly with me. I’ll wait and give you a chance to explain if I don’t understand.”

“When we said we were going to date, I figured I could handle it if anything happened to you. We’re both first responders; we understand the job. But I think about how you must have felt when I was attacked, and I keep thinking back to…” Evan stopped, but his fingers gently touched the base of Lou’s throat, then slid up to the midline where the scar was pretty well obscured by the natural lines of the neck.

“Evan…” Lou whispered.

“Is this okay?”

“Yes.”

Evan’s eyes were shiny with tears. “I wouldn’t cope well. It’s terrible, right? I’ve been hurt so much on the job, but I just know I’d fall to pieces if you were shot or someone came after you again. I’m not asking you to change anything; I accept the risk of being with a police officer. But I’d be a hot mess inside if I got that call. And that’s when I realized my path is in LA now just by virtue of that’s where I already was. Inertia at work, as it were. But whether I remained in LA would depend…on you.

“I know it’s probably too soon to say it, but I’m so in love with you, Lou. If something happened to you, I’d probably be encouraging you to get your ass out of here. But whether you stayed or left, my path is with you.”

“Evan…” He reached up and pulled him down the few inches needed for their mouths to meet. Evan opened up for him beautifully, letting Lou slip inside. His aim for a tender kiss flew right out of his mind as their tongues slid together, and Evan melted into him.

Evan’s weight on him was perfection, and the sinfully lush mouth made him forget all his better intentions. His hands slid around to Evan’s tight, round ass, grabbing the firm flesh and pulling his would-be lover closer. He was rewarded with a deep groan that reverberated through both of them. He held Evan still even as he thrust up against the big, hard cock he felt pressed against him.

They kissed and ground against one another until Lou’s lips felt bruised, with Lou holding Evan in one spot and doing most of the movement himself. Then he moved one hand to Evan’s hip and threaded the other through his hair, fisting his hand to tug sharply, pulling Evan’s head back.

He got a shuddery gasp, and Evan went boneless against his chest.

“Lou…” Evan rasped.

He worked his mouth down the long line of Evan’s throat, biting and sucking a path to his collarbone as he mentally cataloged every shudder and gasp his work elicited from the man in his arms.

Tugging Evan’s shirt down a bit, he worried some flesh between his teeth, getting a shiver. “I can’t wait until I can have you underneath me.” They’d handled the business of texting about STI testing while Evan was in Texas. Evan had emailed his last two panels, which were apparently after he and Tommy broke up, and he’d asked them to be run while he was in the hospital after the shooting. He hadn’t been with anyone in between. Lou was in a similar position in terms of recent partners due to work demands.

“You can have me underneath you.”

Lou pulled back so their gazes met. “The last thing I ever want to do is hurt you.”

“Holding myself in the right way and not trying to thrust against you is really key. I finally got the handle on jerking off in the shower over the last few days.”

“Is that right?”

“Yeah.” Evan traced the lines of his face with delicate touches. “I have this hot guy I’m nearly dating that I’ve barely been allowed to kiss. I think about you all the time. Having this injury get in the way of my thinking-about-Lou time was not my favorite part of this whole experience.”

Lou took Evan’s hands and turned them so he could kiss the insides of his wrists. “We are absolutely dating, sweetheart. Even if it’s just sitting by a pond while you take your first walk after surgery, it’s dating.”

“Was that our first date?” Evan asked with a soft smile.

“I think our first date might have been saying goodbye to the Jeep.”

“Oh.” Evan’s eyes got a little glassy with tears that he quickly blinked away. Then he pressed delicate kisses to the corners of Lou’s mouth. “Yeah. Best first date of my life, my love. Thank you for that.”

Lou blinked at the casual endearment that sounded so right. “You meant that…”

Evan looked confused, then sheepish. “Sorry. I’ve been reining myself in for a few days, because I wanted to talk to you first, but it’s been in my brain, and—”

“I love you too.” He huffed a little laugh. “Hondo keeps telling me when it’s right, it can happen in two days or two weeks, or sometimes it takes two years.”

“We truly saw each other when we were receptive, I guess. I’m not complaining. We’ve moved so fast emotionally, if we need to slow down in other areas, I’m fine. But I don’t feel like I’m on a runaway train with you. I just feel…” He frowned.

Lou gently rubbed away the furrow. “What do you feel?”

“Happy.”

“And I feel a contentment I’ve never known, so I think we’re doing okay.”

“For the first time in my life, I feel like I’m where I belong.”

“Finally, the center of your own universe?”

“I’m thinking we’re binary stars.”

Lou grinned. “Oh, baby, speak to me in astronomical terms. Gravitational binding would explain a lot. What’s our barycenter?”

“Well, now that I’ve met Albert King…”

Laughing, Lou pulled Evan down into another kiss, unable to get enough of how soft Evan’s lips were. “We orbit around my cat?”

“Well, he represents our shared love of music, no? Which we both associate heavily to life experiences, and I think our gravitational center is that we both speak the same life language. We want to exist with the same honesty in the world. And your demanding, fluffy, enormous, badly named cat can be symbolic of that.”

Lou sobered a bit and stared at Evan, feeling really seen. “I think I’m very much okay with our gravitational binding.”

Evan’s smile was so bright and happy that it took Lou’s breath away. “Here. Help me up. If you’ll just lend me a little stability with your hands, I should be able to get to my feet without twisting.”

Once Evan was on his feet, Lou said, “I really liked you in my lap, though.”

“But you offered me a horizontal surface, good sir, and I’m holding you to it.”

Lou pulled him in for another kiss, because he couldn’t seem to stop wanting to kiss this wonderful man, then led him through the house toward the bedroom.

Evan stalled out in the dining room. “What’s with your furniture?”

“I was trying something out.”

“Strange decorating for former bachelors…?”

“Do you want an answer now or get horizontal and get an answer later?”

“Now, that’s a loaded question. Will the answer distract me?”

“Undoubtedly.”

“Then answer later. You on top of me now.”

“Wow.” Lou laughed and kept moving them down the hallway. In the bedroom, he gently nudged Evan back against the wall, kissing up the line of his throat again until he got to his earlobe and could catch it in his teeth. “Do you know what I wanted to do the most the first time I saw you?”

“You mean the very first time you saw me?” Evan asked breathlessly

“Very first time,” Lou confirmed.

“Arrest me?”

“Peel you out of your clothes, lay you out on a bed, and make you forget how to interfere in police investigations.”

“Wow. All aboard that plan. Really? Way back then?”

“You know you’re hot. I didn’t know you well enough to know I wanted to take you dancing and go find a dark sky area and go star gazing as well.”

Evan gave him a soft smile.

Lou grabbed the hem of his shirt and tugged up. “You good lifting both arms?” In response, Evan did, and Lou got rid of the shirt, tossing it on the armchair near the window. They managed to get undressed with gentle touching and soft kisses interspersed with soft laughter. The laughter was new for him, especially for a first time with someone. But he felt like he knew Evan better than most of his prior partners, so the easy humor made sense.

He finally got Evan gloriously sprawled out on his bed, when Evan said, “Oh, I need my phone. It’s in my pocket.”

Lou blinked.

“I made us a sex playlist.”

Lou threw back his head and laughed. “New one just for us?”

“Of course.”

“Does it have Let’s Get It On on there?”

“Duh.”

Delighted, Lou stepped back from the bed to rummage in Evan’s pockets to get his phone and pair it to the Bose Sound System on the dresser.

Evan hit play, and Baby I’m-a Want You by Bread started playing.

Lou blinked.

“I figured we’d be starting this a little earlier in the process than before full nudity.”

Lou laughed again and levered himself over Evan. “It’s perfect. You utterly delight me, but I hope you know we’re not doing much here.”

“I hope we’re getting off,” Evan protested indignantly.

“We’re definitely doing that.” Lou was still laughing as he leaned down for a kiss. “Tell me if my weight on you hurts.” He slowly let his weight settle, loving the feel of Evan’s body underneath him.

Evan groaned. “God, you feel good.” Suddenly, Use Me by Bill Withers started, and the transition was surprisingly good, but it starting right after Evan’s words made Lou’s brain freeze.

“You’re going to kill me.”

“I would never.” Evan slid his legs apart and wrapped sinfully long legs around Lou’s hips. “Come on and kiss me like you’re gonna do something. Let’s Get It On is next.”

Lou took control of Evan’s mouth, the kiss incendiary but also comforting, like Evan was the only person he ever wanted to call home. He reached between them, aligning their cocks. They seemed to be of similar size, which was quite a bit above average, but he’d have to be in a less sex-dazed state of mind to catalog differences and similarities other than big.

He had a firm grip on Evan’s hips when the promised next song started to play, and he thrust against his lover. He bit Evan’s lower lip and got nipped in return before Evan chased his mouth for another kiss.

“I’m too wound up,” Lou warned.

Evan bit his jaw and tightened the clasp of his legs. “I’m barely holding on here.” His hands were wandering aimlessly, but the left never roamed too far down or up.

Then Let’s Stay Together by Al Green started, and the first line “I’m so in love with you” hit Lou right in the gut, and he came messily between them, with Evan following him almost immediately while Lou was still thrusting to ride out the orgasm.

He let his weight rest on Even, breathing harshly against his neck, trying to get his bearings. “Too heavy?”

Evan tightened his legs. “No.” He sounded equally winded, breath ghosting over Lou’s hair. Evan’s fingers grazed over the side of Lou’s face, but he seemed content to stay like that.

Let’s Stay Together was finishing, and Lou was thinking about getting up to clean them both when Bring It on Home to Me by Sam Cooke started. He blew out a shaky breath and rolled off, grabbing a t-shirt for a quick cleanup, then lay on his side just staring at Evan.

Evan rolled to his side to face Lou, hand coming up again to cup Lou’s face again.

They wound up just lying on their sides pressed close together, foreheads touching, breath mingling, listening to Sam Cooke.

The last thing Lou remembered was What You Won’t Do for Love by Bobby Caldwell starting.

~*~

Lou blinked awake as a familiar few notes played over his speakers, alone in bed, and then Bobby Hatfield began to sing, “O my love, my darling…”

“Evan?”

He heard some distant noises from the kitchen, so he threw off the blanket he hadn’t had on earlier, finding he’d also been cleaned up more, and put on some pants. He drifted out into the kitchen to find Evan cooking. Evan was in nothing but a pair of Lou’s track pants, which was a nice view. The only not-nice part was that he finally got a good look at Evan’s back, which was still colorful. The healing scar on his back was also much larger than the one under his left ribcage.

Evan was humming something, but Lou couldn’t quite make it out. His lover caught sight of Lou leaning in the doorway and turned around, smiling broadly. “Hey. Sleep well?”

“Really good. I didn’t even notice you got up.” Which was really weird for him. “You found something to cook?”

“Yeah, you’ve got tons of stuff.”

“I do? Huh. Okay. Need help?”

“Nope.” Evan wiped his hands on a towel. “I just finished setting the rice cooker and prepping vegetables. I won’t need to do anything else for about twenty minutes.”

“I thought I was out of rice.”

“I’m making the quinoa in it.”

“I didn’t know you could do that.” He reached out and reeled Evan in for a kiss.

Evan readily folded himself against Lou, accepting the kiss. “Now, explain the furniture oddities in the dining room.”

“I pushed it all against the wall to clear floor space.”

“Why?”

“So we could dance if we wanted to. If you wear socks, your feet should glide easily—possibly too easily—and you won’t have any grab on your abdomen if you make an unexpected turn. I was trying it, but it was hard to tell how much I was using those muscles.”

Evan’s eyes lit up. “Really?”

“Yeah.” He brushed his mouth over Evan’s, loving the way Evan’s lips were so luscious. “I woke up to Unchained Melody. That’s on the sex playlist?” he teased.

“That’s way down the playlist. In the afterglow section, when we’re basking in our feelings. That’s like an hour in. Maybe ninety minutes.”

Lou grinned. “The afterglow section?”

“Every sex playlist needs an afterglow section where you can just chill or even sleep through it.”

“You going to send me this playlist?”

“And ruin the mystique of all the songs you haven’t heard on it yet?” Evan’s eyes were alight with mirth.

“Is your song on there?”

“You mean Time of the Season?”

Lou nodded.

Evan shook his head, and a little beep on his watch had him checking a pot on the stove. Then he pulled a bowl of cut fruit from the fridge and set it on the counter. He popped a cube of melon in his mouth and wiggled his brows at Lou.

Shaking his head, Lou took a bit of cantaloupe and put it in his mouth, sliding on the barstool. “Why isn’t it on the playlist? The song reeks of sex to me.”

“That it does.” Evan shrugged. “I want to dance to it first, I guess.” He gave Lou a mischievous grin. “Did you know that’s the first known use of the phrase ‘Who’s your daddy’?”

Lou blinked. “Seriously?”

“Yeah. They’ve never found an earlier instance of that particular turn of phrase prior to it appearing in the Zombies’ song. ‘What’s your name? Who’s your daddy? Is he rich like me?’” Evan sang softly. “I mean, sounds like a prelude to prostitution, but it’s still hot. The whole song is.”

Lou grabbed another bite of melon. “Mm. Given the right circumstances, I could certainly be persuaded to a different endearment.”

Evan grinned mischievously. “Is that right? I guess when I’m able to move properly without any pain at all, you’ll just have to put your back into it, Daddy.”

The flash of desire was dizzyingly hot and intense. Lou raised one brow and popped a grape into his mouth. “I can put my back into it a little sooner; I’ll just have to keep a certain someone completely still.”

Evan’s eyes dilated, and his breath became a little short. “Oh, well. Fun times for me.”

Lou was dangerously close to hauling Evan back to bed, but something caught his sense of smell. “Are you baking?”

“Yep. Bread.”

“Bread?” He took a more careful kitchen inventory and realized the pressure cooker was also going. “What did you manage to find in my pantry?”

Evan grinned. “You’re responsible for the dinner playlist and setting the table.” He made a shooing motion. “You’ve got ten minutes. Oh, would you toss me a shirt?”

~*~

Lou set the table first and had quite a few minutes to spare when he just started his slow-dance playlist for dinner.

But the minute Sara Smile by Hall & Oates started to play, Evan was suddenly there, crowding into Lou’s space. “I can’t hear this song without wanting to slow dance, Lou. You have to indulge me.”

Tickled, he curled his arms around Evan. “With pleasure, sweetheart.”

Evan rested his head on Lou’s shoulder, and they swayed in place. “I’ve never understood how anyone hears this song without wishing they were with their significant other, holding one another, and swaying to the music.”

Lou pressed a kiss to his temple. “It’s my slow-dance playlist.”

Evan chuckled lightly. “We’re never going to get to eat.”

“Sure we will. It’ll be interesting to see which ones you prioritize getting up and dancing to, though. I’ll have to make a ‘Evan will be all over me if I play this’ playlist.”

Evan laughed. “Please do.”

What a Fool Believes by the Doobie Brothers started. Evan grinned. “Absolutely danceable, but I can actually finish dinner with just some hip wiggling and singing along in the kitchen.”

“Can I watch?”

Evan winked and headed back to the kitchen.

He was doing something to some baby Bok choy when September by Earth, Wind & Fire started, and his lips pursed. “Must dance, for future reference, but there’d be too much wiggling. I’ll have to wait until we can try the socks.”

“Duly noted,” Lou remarked from his spot on the barstool.

In short order, he realized Evan had prepared black-eyed peas in the pressure cooker, which he then mixed with the quinoa, some soft almond-flour bread, and roasted baby Bok choy that had been cooked super fast and had a caramel color from being cooked in the air fryer.

Lou carried the plates to the table, sat down, and stared at it.

“Problem?” Evan asked, sliding in next to him.

“You made me black-eyed peas.”

“You said you loved them.”

Lou blew out a breath. His dad used to always make them whenever he was home, and they were a favorite of Lou’s, but he never took the time to cook them, even though he always kept bags around. “I mentioned that in our first phone conversation.”

“I know.”

Lou blinked away the emotions. “I’m just being emotional here. It looks amazing, Evan.” He took a bite of the mixture. “God, that’s good. Dad always served it with rice, but that carb load at night is rough for me. The quinoa is perfect.” He’d always had it served over cornbread, but the almond flour bread seemed to hold up pretty well to all the moisture. “I’m surprised the bread holds up, actually, for being as soft as it is.”

“It’s high in fat, low in carbs, and despite the fat level, will dry out like whoa if you don’t eat it in about twenty-four hours. But, yeah, I think the high egg and high fat content makes it hold up to the liquids fairly well. Not as good as a dense cornbread, but…”

“Maybe not, but it tastes great, and there are all kinds of tradeoffs to not have the carb bomb that is black-eyed peas, rice, and cornbread.”

Evan laughed, then his gaze flicked to the big portable Bluetooth speaker he kept on the bar in the kitchen as an Eagles song started to play.

“Take It to the Limit is one of your must-dance songs? Not sure why that surprises me.”

“Not when I’m eating, but, yeah. I couldn’t even tell you why. Also, if I Can’t Tell You Why is on this playlist. That one too. And Best of My Love.”

Lou laughed. “Noted.” He took a few more bites, nearly two-thirds finished with his first portion, and he planned to eat more. “Can I confess something?”

“You know you can.”

“I worried you’d want to stay in Texas.”

“I know.”

Lou looked up sharply.

Evan gave him a sad smile. “And I never doubted you’d have been supportive of that decision if I’d made it. I didn’t know how to reassure you while I was there, and attempts seemed like they’d reek of denial or desperation.”

“Mm. I suppose.” Lou continued eating, thinking things through. “Do you think they wanted you to stay?”

“Yes. After a fashion. It’s too familiar, you know? Eddie would have easily conceded to a request, if for no other reason than it’s what his son wanted.” Evan sighed. “And everything could have been like it was.”

“Good? Bad?”

“The same.” Evan’s smile was bittersweet. “I told Eddie the issue with our arrangement was that it was never reciprocal. They were the center of my universe, and I was occasionally important, but not…” He frowned. “I guess it’s like a comet or something. It can, with the gravitational forces, cause disruption, throw things off their natural course, and it’s very distracting while it’s visible in the sky, but then it’s not visible anymore. The analogy wears thin…” He took a few more bites of his own meal.

“Maybe, but I know what you mean.”

“At first, I think Eddie thought I blamed him for not noticing how imbalanced our relationship was. And maybe there are some things he needs to look at, but that’s not my call to make because I don’t blame him for my mistakes. When things weren’t reciprocal, and obviously couldn’t be reciprocal, letting it go on the way it did, especially for so long, that was my error.” He shrugged.

Lou finished the current portion of food, planning to get more in a moment, but he wanted to finish the conversation with Evan first. “And after having everything pointed out to him, if he had decided to try for a reciprocal arrangement?”

“You mean go all in on platonic life partners?”

Lou nodded.

“I was already in a relationship with you by that point.” Evan sighed and folded his hands. “I can’t lessen the impact Eddie’s friendship has had on my life; it’s been the most notable adult relationship to this point. I don’t want to mislead you to try to downplay what his friendship has been in the past, what it means to me today, or what role it’s likely to play in the future.

“I also can’t understate how important Christopher is to me. But what I do know is that existing for people who could never be mine, not the way I was theirs, left me feeling hollow and hurt all the time. I didn’t even see it for what it was. I don’t know how to reconcile all these parts yet, but I do know that you are for me, and that makes me feel here and now and present. I’m trying to just let what Eddie and Chris are in my life be for the moment. I don’t know what final shape that will take, but I know it won’t revert.”

“Even if Eddie explicitly is willing to say, ‘let’s be family’?”

“No.”

“How do you know?”

“Did you miss the Lou Ransone in the picture? I want you, but it’s not a you or Eddie thing since they’re different types of relationships.” Evan pursed his lips for a moment. “If you walked away, I wouldn’t be headed for Texas, okay? Me being part of the Diaz family is not going to happen.”

“For yourself, do you know why?”

Evan frowned, then sighed. “It sounds so selfish, but I need to be someone’s top priority at least sometimes. I need to be the first thing they think about in the morning, on at least some mornings. Eddie made a weird leap that I wanted him to choose between me and Chris, which I don’t even know how he got there, but I just wanted him to fucking consider my feelings sometimes. But it’s like if he stops to consider me, then obviously he’s not considering his child. As if he can’t be considerate to both of us.” Evan rubbed the bridge of his nose. “This was before you and I met, actually, but it just really struck me that everything in his mind is a competition. Everything is always stack-ranked, and there’s only room for one of anything at a time.”

“That’s actually really sad.”

“I think so.” He gave a bittersweet smile. “He kept a lot of things from me because he didn’t want to deal with my emotional reaction, you know? And that tells me a lot about how little and how low I rank in the priority list that any reaction from me is that inconvenient. And I just can’t be so insignificant to the person who is my primary relationship, whether it’s platonic or romantic. So, no, Lou, if you and I were not a thing, I would not be trying to repair the hot mess that was my place in the Diaz family.”

“Evan—”

He pushed back from the table. “You want some more? I think I’m still a little hungry.”

“Um, yeah.”

Then Evan, with his eyes filled with tears, was gone with plates in hand.

Following his gut, Lou went after his lover, finding Evan with his hands braced on the counter, head hanging down. Lou gently tugged him close, pulling him around, so he could hold Evan in his arms. “I’m sorry I pushed that,” he whispered in Evan’s ear.

Evan shook his head. “I needed to say it,” he admitted, voice raspy. “It just sounds so selfish, and everyone says I’m too selfish and needy—”

“Please don’t tell me what everyone else says, or I’ll fucking lose it.” Lou held Evan tighter. “Eddie needs therapy. He has a very narrow scope of what he can deal with emotionally, and that could be his parents, his military service, or who knows what. But that’s not on you. I somewhat regret pushing that, but I think that needed to come out.

“I also needed to confront my own insecurity head on, because I don’t usually have them in relationships, not like this, but I’m so fucking gone on you, Evan, and you’ve got this huge thing that I don’t want to get in the way of. I just need to be sure I understand the shape of it and where I fit.”

Evan squeezed him hard enough that Lou had to worry about it hurting his lover. “You belong with me. We promised to talk stuff out, even the Eddie stuff. It’s gonna hurt and it’ll be hard. Especially if he winds up back here, which is what we predict will happen within eighteen months. So I just gotta work on my boundaries and nurturing my gravitational bindings.”

Lou laughed against Evan’s shoulder.

“I am mentally prepared to be Eddie’s friend when he comes back to LA. That’s it. Just his friend. I’ve got some work to do to get there.”

“I’ll help.”

“Thank you.”

They’d just made it back to the table with their seconds when Best of My Love started to play.

Lou didn’t even ask, he just pulled Evan into his arms and started to sway. The food could be reheated.

Oh, sweet darling
You get the best of my love

Chapter Sixteen

Buck left the Academy on Friday, after three full weeks of being an instructor, fully ready to embrace a quality weekend with Lou. His lover wasn’t on call, and Buck’s section did not meet on Saturdays. He taught long days on Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays, but his weekends were his own until he was cleared to be a firefighter again.

He had a little update from Jasmine, who was loving her internship with the city. She was doing so well, the city was prioritizing recruiting her when she was finished with her schooling, and she wanted Buck’s opinions on the departments that wanted to hire her. He smiled and left a reminder for himself to respond to her message later in the weekend. He also wanted to invite her to the next big BBQ with Carla and Howard.

It was a good forty minutes to Lou’s in this level traffic, so he put on his favorite driving playlist and got on the road. He was barely going before his in-dash display, which was connected to his phone, displayed Eddie’s name. He tapped the answer button.

“Hey, Eds. How was the last forty-eight?”

“It was good. It’s still a bit of an adjustment, but I like SAR as much as firefighting, I think. The shifts are brutally long. And they told me I’m clear of whatever trial period it is. I’m surprised it was so short.”

“Congrats, man. You must be relieved.”

“To not have the huge drop in pay? Yeah. And as much as the two full days a week away are a drag, it’s nice to be a full-time dad four days in a row every single week.”

“I’m happy for you, Eds.”

“We did have that little breakthrough in therapy this morning you were sort of expecting.”

“Your mom regressed into her original form of a Balrog?”

Eddie laughed. “I mean, she has her moments, but I have to admit, taken over all, she is slowly improving. No, Christopher blurted out that he had chosen to come to El Paso to punish me. He’s been locked in his room since therapy.”

“Wow. What’d the therapist say?”

“That he might react this way, and to give him some time to process. I don’t suppose you’d talk to him?”

“Nooo…. If there were a major crisis, Eds, I would, but I not only promised myself, but I did have that whole convo with the therapist about letting things play out and letting you two figure out how to heal and communicate without my intervention. I hate that Chris is upset, but it sounds like wherever he’s at right now is what the therapist was expecting. You two have a whole plan, plus you prepped this with the therapist. It’ll be okay. If you think it’s going sideways, start with her and figure out an intervention plan. I do not want to make things worse or—” Buck blew out a breath. “I don’t want to be seen as a necessary bridge between you two talking. Because I’m not. We know I’m not.”

“No, I know. Sorry. I just hate to see him upset.”

“I get it, but he’s been holding on to this for a while. Just let him know you’re not mad, but you’d like to talk about it when he’s ready. Or give him the space to not talk about it at all until the next session so he’s willing to come out of his room.”

“Right. I can do that. I’ll send him a text. He hates it when I try to talk to him through his door.” Eddie heaved a breath that sounded like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. “How goes teaching?”

“Eh. I’m certainly not ready to retire from active duty and teach all day. But it’s passing the time.”

“Bobby said you’re off to a SAR Bureau in the Valley when you’re cleared…?”

“Yeah, Jones is going with me, and we’re going to try partnering. I don’t see why we wouldn’t work well together. We’ve done rescues before, and we get along fine. He’s got a super questionable sense of humor—like more than yours and Ravi’s combined—but he’s a good guy.”

“Hey!”

Buck smiled. “I thought they were just going to make the 118 a task force, but they’re making it a full SAR Bureau, which means major construction for about three weeks so they can fit two more full apparatus and another ambo. So the shifts will get parsed out to nearby stations, which will run heavy. Calley and the triple crew, and the B & C shift counterparts, will ride from the 115. Bobby and the truck crew will ride from the 133. The ambulances will be dynamically assigned between the two stations as needed.” Buck blew out a breath. “The hard part is waiting to find out if Bobby will be the shift captain or not.”

“What? I don’t follow.”

“In a big task force station, there are multiple captains. Or if the station is big enough, it has its own assistant chief with several captains under them. The 56 has an assistant chief and I think five captains. Harbor has a senior captain and three subordinate captains. Part of the issue is Bobby has to decide if he wants to cut down on time in the field. If he’s responsible for the whole station, he has to split between the station and moving between different scenes in the command truck. He can’t ride in an apparatus the way he does now.”

“Oh. What does he want?”

“I’m not sure. He’s talked to me a little, but he’s keeping his decision criteria close to the vest. I got even odds on him wanting to run the whole show and wanting to stay with the truck crew. But Alonzo has to agree to him running the station, and I know they’ve been talking a lot.”

“Should I call him?”

“God no. I’m talking confidentially to my friend. Bobby doesn’t need the stress of thinking we’re gossiping about him.”

“But you’ll ride on the truck either way?”

“Uh, no. One of the new apparatuses is going to be a specialty SAR vehicle, dedicated to search and rescue work. I’ll be tasked to that apparatus. The SAR captain is apparently an old timer from the 118. He and Bobby used to clash when Bobby first joined, but you know how Bobby wins people over. The two have talked a lot, and he says DeLuca knows his stuff, so…” Buck shrugged like Eddie could see him.

“I know that name. I think Tommy has mentioned him.”

“Yeah, I think so. I don’t know anything about him. The guy makes Hen tense, but she doesn’t have to ride with him. I’ll sound her out about him at some point and make sure there aren’t any red flags, but no one asked for my opinion on anything.”

“Damn, that’s a lot. Hard to wrap my head around. How goes getting cleared to go back?”

“I’ve been doing light PT for a couple of weeks, full leg work while I worked on core stabilization exercises. I got cleared on Wednesday to start working up to my full workout to tolerance starting this weekend. So, we’ll see how it goes. Probably a couple more weeks to get cleared to return to duty. I’m going to start doing some climbing in the gym with Jones next weekend.”

“You must be so relieved.”

“Definitely eager to hang up my teacher’s credentials for now. Also, I saw Maddie this week.”

“Ugh. How was that?”

“Weird. We did it with Athena present. Maddie immediately went on the offensive, asking if we suddenly needed a chaperone.”

“Well… I’m not sure you don’t. Not because of you, but she doesn’t listen to a damn thing you say. Maybe you should have recorded it.”

Buck busted out laughing. “Athena insisted on it.” The bitter pill in all of it was that he’d always had these issues with Maddie, but people tended not to listen to him, assuming he was being dramatic or something, but suddenly everyone got it. Nothing had changed from his end.

“Did you two resolve anything?”

“No. She still thinks I have magical powers to fix things. What am I going to fix? I walked her through her scenario where I somehow could convince the prosecutor not to pursue charges against Chimney, at all, and asked her what then, and she said, ‘then everything can go back like it was.’ I thought Athena was going to blow a gasket.”

Eddie was silent for a long time. “Does Maddie need to pursue inpatient treatment again, because that level of denial and delusion doesn’t sound normal.”

“I don’t know, man. I asked her what exactly would go back…? She’s been terminated from dispatch for cause, though she’s cagey about what happened there. My guess is that Sue keeps really good records in case she needs to get rid of people. Anyway, Maddie is working on her licensing to work as a nurse again, but she said she prefers dispatch.”

“Aren’t they moving?”

“That’s supposed to be the plan.”

“Why would she be pursuing licensing in California if she’s moving?”

“I dunno. The conversation made no sense, and she really thinks that if I just wave my hand, I can undo this whole situation. But I think I got a little clarity about why she was so desperately trying to get me to do something when I saw her on Monday, Chim took his plea on Wednesday.”

“Ah. Was it what we’d discussed?”

“Yeah. The sentencing judge is a bit of a soft touch and indicated a willingness to transfer his probation to Seattle after half the probation term if he’s compliant with all conditions. I mean, his probation is only for three months, so he just has to follow the rules here in LA for six weeks, then they’ll let him off the hook so they can go to Seattle. The Lees are leaving for Whidbey Island next week and will let them stay up to three months while they get settled.”

“What about Albert?”

“Ultimately, he plans to stay in LA. I think he’s getting some money from his father to buy the house so Maddie and Chim can get the asking price.”

“I don’t even know what to say, so I’ll say nothing. You seen Hen?”

“Yeah, she and Karen started coming to Howard Price’s trivia nights.” Al Ramsey had also started attending. He was the guy who had received Buck’s Jeep. He’d wanted to thank Buck in person, and Buck had wanted a low-key situation so he didn’t feel overwhelmed, so he’d invited Al to trivia night. The next thing you knew, Al was part of Howard’s projects, the SWAT guys were getting involved with helping the kids, and Al was a regular because, in his own words, he needed more adults to hang out with for an occasional break from the kids.

Buck continued to relay the trivia night craziness. “Hen and Karen are nearly unbeatable as a team except for a couple of weaknesses. I know history and music better. Howard is gleeful about a rotating group of trivia powerhouses to pit against those ‘retired CEO jerks’ his league plays against. Lou’s buddies from SWAT dropped in on the last one. The real one, not the practice one I did at Howard and Carla’s house.”

“Hen doing okay?”

“She’s struggling, but she’s finding a way to balance being Chim’s friend, or trying to, without enabling. I know it hurts her, though. Making more friends is good, I think, for helping her let go and move on. She’s become very invested in Al Ramsey’s projects, even though the two of them outwardly have very little in common.”

“Yeah, it’s hard to prioritize meeting new people when you already have people you can count on and that you trust.”

“True. But speaking of new people, have you met anyone? Made new little friends, Edmundo?”

“Ass. And no. You know I’m not looking for romance right now. The last thing I want to introduce into the situation with Chris is a new romantic partner in my life.”

“I get it, but remember to talk to the therapist about it. You can’t tiptoe around Chris. He won’t thank you for it. You also need to make actual friends.”

“I suppose.”

“Speaking of friends, have you been keeping in touch with Tommy?”

“Dios, you’re a pest. Micromanaging my buddy group.”

“Oh no, Eds. Does that mean you haven’t talked to him?”

“It means I have been. But I did nearly forget, and I’m relieved he reached out first. But I’m actually starting to put reminders on my phone to contact people.”

“What’s wrong with that?”

“It feels inauthentic if I have to be reminded.”

“We all need reminders, Eddie. I mean, you’ve got a gorgon coming to your house on the regular. You might need an occasional phone pop-up that says, ‘pretend I’m interested in other people.’”

“Why am I friends with you?”

“Because I’m charming?”

“No.”

“Because I’m hot?”

“Definitely no.”

“Because I’m a good cook?”

“Closer, but I have Tía Pepa for that.”

“Because no one else knows you as well?”

“Eh.”

“Right.”

“How’s Lou?”

“Ham-handed segue, Diaz.”

“Ham-handed evasion, Buckley.”

“I’m not evading.”

“You always seem like you’re evading when I ask about your relationship.”

Buck sighed, realizing he’d missed a map update about a car accident and paid attention to Google for a second about a re-route. “The few times we talked about Lou, you seemed a little…judgy. And now that there’s even more to be judgy about, I just would rather be vague.”

“I’m not being judgy.”

“Aren’t you? I mean, practically the first thing you had to say to me about Lou is that he’s a little too old for me.”

“I got the message about Tommy being older, which I honestly had no idea about. It’s just Tommy seems so carefree and…”

“Eds. What do you want to know?”

“Are you guys doing well?”

“We’re totally head over heels in love. Anything else?”

“Wait. You’ve said that to each other?”

“Yep. We also live together, but we also don’t.”

“What does that mean?” Eddie sounded exasperated beyond belief.

“We just don’t sleep well apart. After we slept in the same bed overnight the first time, I went home the next night to be separate entities. Neither of us was asleep at two in the morning. And we both had to work. So he came over and we both went right to sleep. We made other attempts but ultimately gave in to what we both wanted anyway.

“We have separate homes, but I have a ton of stuff at his place, and he has stuff at mine. We spend more time at his because he has a cat that demands a lot of attention.”

“So, you’re just going to move in with him after so little time?” Eddie sounded strangled.

“We haven’t talked about it, and it’s one of the things neither of us seems to need to push right yet. I think we both recognize separate residences is a safety valve in a relatively new relationship. But we do sleep together every night in the same bed because I just don’t like sleeping without him.”

“What will you do when your lease is up in two months?”

“If we’re not ready for the moving in convo, I’ll give up my place and rent a room month-to-month until we are ready for the conversation.”

“Wait. You really think this is the one?”

“I’m absolutely sure of it.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yes. I’m absolutely sure Lou is the love of my life.”

“Buck… Why didn’t you say?”

“Eddie, there’s a lot of stuff going on for both of us. I’m comfortable in my situation with Lou, but I don’t need anyone else’s feedback right now.”

“If you were sure of yourself, wouldn’t you be telling everyone?”

“Everyone knows I’m dating Lou.”

“Does everyone know you’re in love? Practically living together?”

“Everyone who? And why does it matter who knows?”

“Who even really knows this guy?”

“Athena.”

“Right. I forgot she… Right.” He sighed. “You want me to butt out, don’t you?”

“You do not know Lou, so your opinions right now are based on your opinions of me. Consider how insulting this all is.”

“Dios, Buck, I didn’t mean it like that.”

“I know. My certainty that you’re not trying to be the raging douche you’re cosplaying is why I’m not hanging up. But please remind yourself, whenever you’re tempted to butt in or call someone back here in LA to get them to butt in, that you are not here. You cannot see what’s going on. You don’t know Lou. You’ve barely seen us together. For that matter, the only people who have are Bobby and Athena, Howard and Carla, plus a bunch of people you don’t know. And I promise you, Carla will tell you all about yourself if you express negative opinions about my relationship.”

“Buck, I’m just concerned.”

“I’m not sure why.”

“As you said, I’m here and you’re there. Who is going to pick up the pieces when it falls apart?”

“Wow.” Buck blew out a breath. “Eddie, rewind that sentence, listen to yourself, and let me know if you’d like to apologize now or if I should hang up and we can schedule a call for you to grovel.”

There was a long silence, and then Eddie blew out a breath. “I’m sorry; I don’t even know why I said that.”

“I suspect there’s something going on with you that you’re not telling me. You tend to lash out when you’re saturated emotionally, but this method of dealing with your feelings is done.”

“Buck.”

“Done. Talk to your therapist, Eds. I love you, man. That will never change, but you can’t deliver blows like that just because you’re upset about something and I’m on the other end of the phone.”

“That wasn’t fair to you; I know that. I don’t even know why I did it.” Eddie sighed. “My mom presented it nicely, but she thinks Christopher should live with her again.”

“So?” He parked in front of Lou’s, but didn’t get out or turn off the car, needing to finish the conversation with Eddie.

“She’s trying to improve, okay? And I see her getting better. I don’t want to cause—”

“Nope! Not doing this. Helena is a Balrog. She may have the potential to improve, but it doesn’t surprise me that she’s trying to turn Christopher into her emotional support animal. To which I say so the fuck what? Are you his father or not?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Then what is the problem, Eddie? Stop pussyfooting around your mother’s feelings when she doesn’t give a damn about yours. I think it would be wonderful if Helena got even thirty percent better for the sake of her family, but that’s a long road with someone that manipulative. And she’s already using her willingness to get help to manipulate you even more, and you’re letting her.”

Buck had to stop and take a deep breath. “I can’t even believe you’re getting into an emotional tizzy— Oh wait! That’s why Chris is so bent. He thinks he’s going back to live with his grandparents because of what he confessed in therapy. You both are cutting Helena slack because she’s trying, and she knows how to use it to get what she wants.”

“What?! He’s not going back to live with my mother!” Eddie screeched.

“I’m not?” Buck could hear softly in the background. “But Grandma said it’s better if I live with her so you can work out how you feel about what I did.”

“Buck I gotta go.”

“Have fun storming the castle.” Buck hit disconnect and let his head fall back against the headrest.

Lou’s Subaru was in the driveway, so he was surprised to find no Lou inside. Aretha Franklin was playing softly over the house sound system, currently on Baby I Love You. If it was her greatest hits album, which Lou tended to just hit play on when he got home from work, that track was in the last third of the album, so it had been playing for a while.

Then he spotted the note on the kitchen counter.

— Hey Sweetheart, meet me at MJs. If you can make it by 6:30, don’t worry about dinner. Medha invited us to share in her chickpea curry. I know how you love it. See you soon. – L

If he walked at a brisk clip, he could make it to MJs in ten minutes, which gave him two minutes to change.

Buck: OMW

Lou: <3

~*~

Buck entered the bar a little out of breath but relaxed from the exertion and smiling from ear to ear. “Hey, MJ!”

“Buck! Come give me a hug.” He rounded the end of the bar and swept her up in a hug. He’d gotten to know her a lot better in the weeks he’d been seeing Lou, and he liked her a hell of a lot. “Go on up. Mom just called me for dinner, and Lou’s already up there. I was just making sure Tanya has everything covered down here, even though it’s still pretty quiet. I’ll be right after you.”

He jogged up the stairs. “Evening, Medha!”

“Evan, darling. Come here and give me a kiss. I’ve missed you.” She hugged him firmly and patted his ribs gently. “How is it?”

“Hundred percent. I start back to full workouts this weekend.”

“Meh. Don’t overdo. You firefighters are crazy. Sit, sit.”

Lou was already seated at the table, so Buck braced a hand on the back of his chair and leaned down. “Hello, my love,” he murmured as he dropped a kiss on Lou’s mouth. Lou smiled up at him, then took in Evan’s appearance appreciatively. Lou definitely liked button-up shirts more than pullovers for whatever reason, so Buck liked to indulge him when they were out. He’d picked a light blue button-up with his chinos before running out the door.

Dinner was fun, and the food was amazing. Medha’s stories of her childhood always fascinated Buck endlessly, but she eventually shooed them off with a pot of chai and promises of more later. “Enjoy your dancing.”

Buck grinned at Lou. “It’s that kind of night, huh?”

“We’re overdue.”

MJ took the chai behind the bar. “Too hot to drink now anyway, Lou. You’ve got ten or fifteen minutes before you should come back for the chai.”

“Thanks, MJ.” He tugged Buck out towards the dance floor just as Come and Get Your Love by Redbone started to play.

Buck laughed, knowing this was one of Lou’s favorite dance tracks. “Did you make the playlist for MJ?”

“You bet your cute little butt, I did.”

Buck fell into dancing with Lou. After a couple of minutes, he twined his arms around Lou’s neck at the start of You’re Only Lonely by JD Souther. “I thought our plans for tonight involved my cute little butt.”

Their sex life had been great for all that it had consisted of nothing more intense than hand jobs and blow jobs. Which was plenty intense, considering Lou was thicker than anything Buck had ever experienced, and Buck had developed a bit of a kink for having Lou’s dick cut off his air supply. It was something they were exploring slowly.

“We can move things along in bed and still dance first,” Lou murmured in his ear. “We could have moved things along a little bit more if you weren’t so damn sensitive and squirmy every time I even touch your sweet hole.”

“Lou.” Buck clutched at Lou’s shoulders.

“Patience, sweetheart. We’ll get there. I promise to give you everything you can take.”

Buck bit his lip and forced himself to chill out. From what they’d managed so far, they were very compatible in bed. They both really liked to give head. Lou was a little too sensitive when it came to receiving when it came to anal. He liked the shallow ass play and anything external, but his prostate had to be sort of desensitized to deal with deeper penetration. They’d talked through when those circumstances were likely to occur, which would be pretty rare. Buck had enjoyed playing with Lou’s ass while sucking him off, and he’d made Lou nearly lose his footing by rimming him in the shower, so they had managed to try quite a lot in the last few weeks. Except, really, the one thing Buck really wanted.

Lou’s mouth was still right by Buck’s ear. “That’s one of my favorite memories so far… finding out how desperate you are to have me in your ass. We couldn’t even tie you down enough to get you to be still.”

Buck felt his face go hot, glad for the dark dance floor.

“My second favorite memory was the first time you managed to deepthroat me. That blissed out look on your face…”

“Oh my god, you’re the worst,” Buck hissed. “I’m totally hard on the dance floor.”

“Good. Perfect timing for the next song.” Lou spun him briefly, then pulled him in tight as the first few notes played, and Buck’s breath caught.

“Lou…”

Lou nuzzled behind his ear, and began to softly sing along. “It’s the time of the season; When love runs high; In this time, give it to me easy; And let me try with pleasured hands; To take you in the sun to promised lands; To show you every one; It’s the time of the season for loving.”

“I—”

Lou bit his earlobe. “What’s your name? Who’s your daddy?”

“Fuuuck.” Buck yanked Lou into a bruising kiss as they continued to sway together, joined at the mouth and then from chest to knee.

Lou gentled things, just swaying with him, letting him bury his face in Lou’s neck for the rest of the song and the one after. He was pretty sure it was something by Fleetwood Mac, but he was so focused on Lou and trying not to come out of his skin that he couldn’t focus on anything else, knowing that the song would come back to him later, as these things often did.

Then Lou led him over to the first booth they’d ever sat at. The half round, and this time, they slid close, and Buck draped himself all over Lou.

MJ brought over the chai, which Lou poured. She laughed at them both for being way too into each other, then she went back to dealing with her increasing crowd of customers.

“Medha will be offended if we don’t drink her chai.”

Buck slid his leg into Lou’s lap, so his thigh was pressed into Lou’s cock.

Lou side-eyed him. “Evan.”

Buck picked up his chai and managed to drink.

He managed to chill out while drinking, but he was leisurely nuzzling at Lou’s neck.

Then Lou leaned down to whisper, “Keep dancing or go home?”

“Home.”

Lou extricated them from MJ’s, noting MJ’s mirth as they left. He ordered them an Uber, answering Evan’s obvious question. “It’s a twenty-minute walk home, and I’m not jogging with an erection. The Uber will be here in one minute and have us home in four.”

“Right. Good thinking.” Evan got into his space and nuzzled his throat.

“Evan.”

“You started this.”

“And I’m going to finish it, but not in front of our neighborhood bar.”

“Mm.” Evan stayed plastered to his front but kept things decent. Lou couldn’t have predicted how much that whole thing would get them both worked up.

Then they were in the back of a Prius, and Evan was studiously keeping his hands to himself, because he had strong opinions about traumatizing ride-share drivers with affectionate overexuberance.

Then they were in the house, the door locked, and it was hard to say who was on who first. But Lou had Evan pressed against the front door, sucking at his throat, when Evan whispered right in Lou’s ear, “Definitely time for you to put your back into it, Daddy.”

With a growl and a sharp nip, Lou wrestled Evan’s arms behind his back and started walking him backward down the hall, claiming Evan’s mouth in a harsh kiss.

In the last few weeks, they’d talked extensively about sexual preferences. They both had a bit of a kinky streak, though, could just as easily go without any kink. Leisurely hand jobs with soft, easy kisses were a favorite for both of them in the morning. Evan loved anal penetration, which is why they hadn’t been able to accomplish anything even with a finger yet—he couldn’t be still for love or money.

However, one thing Evan was down for anytime, without prior discussion or negotiation, was being manhandled or held down. So when Lou was in that mood, he just took. And Evan just revved him up.

He got Evan in the bedroom, let go of his arms to get the shirt off, then spun him around and pressed him down, bent over the bed. Before Evan could do much, Lou had one arm twisted up behind his back.

Evan’s groans devolved into whimpers.

Lou leaned down and murmured, “I gave a little scenario while you were on your knees sucking me off the other night. Remember? The one where you get exactly what you’ve been craving.”

Evan groaned and nodded into the bedding.

“I’m going to do it just like that.”

Evan nodded again.

“Condom?”

Evan shook his head, leaving the choice up to Lou.

Lou used his free hand to get Evan’s belt and pants undone, peeling the clothes away, baring Evan’s ass to the air. “Don’t move.” He released the arm to get Evan’s clothes and shoes fully off, leaving Evan naked.

He threw down one of the big sex towels, which kept him from having to change his bedding, then manhandled Evan onto the bed, on his knees, then pressed his chest and face into the mattress, knees far apart. His hole was exposed for Lou’s attention.

Evan groaned, grabbing the covers.

“Beautiful,” Lou murmured, getting in between Evan’s legs, still fully dressed himself, with the bottle of lube in hand. He slid slippery fingers over Evan’s hole, just teasing it.

Evan whimpered, back arching like a cat, shoulders flexing.

Despite how long it had been since Evan had been fucked, he opened up beautifully to Lou’s fingers. His body flexed and arched in his pleasure, but his ass relaxed into it, letting Lou quickly progress from two to three and then to four.

When Lou had four seated in Evan’s ass, his lover stilled his movements, gasping at the stretch, moaning into the blankets. Then, when Evan’s hole stopped twitching around the four fingers, Lou finally opened his pants and pulled out his cock, which was so hard it was painful, and slicked himself up.

Sliding his cock into Evan was…perfect.

Evan gasped and stilled, fingers twitching over the covers as if he were seeking something else to grab. His hole fluttered around Lou’s cock as Lou pushed inside, one long glide—slow, steady, inexorable.

“Lou,” Evan gasped.

“Perfect,” Lou repeated his thought out loud once he was fully inside.

“Please.”

“Please, what?”

Evan wiggled, trying to move to get some sort of leverage as Lou locked his hand firmly on Evan’s hips. “Please fuck me.”

Lou pulled his hips back and snapped them forward again.

Evan gave a little muffled scream.

He repeated the action five times with a long wait between each thrust, enough of a wait to get Evan begging for it between. Then he let go and started to fuck in earnest.

Evan’s shoulder muscles knotted up, his hands fisted in the pillow above his head, little breathy moans punched out of him with each thrust.

Lou felt like he was teetering on the brink when he stopped, panting, hands tight on Evan’s hips. Probably tight enough to leave marks.

“Lou! Don’t stop, don’t stop. God…”

“As much as I love seeing you spread out like this, the only problem with this angle is I’m not getting to pound your prostate the way I want to.” In their talks, Evan had revealed he needed a lot of prostate stimulation to come without his dick being touched. Being fucked and his dick stroked was always good in his mind, but he needed his prostate directly pounded to come untouched.

Lou spread his own legs a little wider, knocking Evan’s legs farther apart and pushing him off balance. He took Evan by the shoulders and chest and manhandled him up, forcing him to sit back on Lou’s lap.

Evan screamed a little as he was forced down deep on Lou’s cock, arms flailing for purchase on something.

“Reach back and wrap your arms behind my neck.”

Evan immediately did so, causing his body to arch beautifully. Lou immediately put his hands on Evan’s nipples, pinching and rolling them. Evan’s sounds devolved into whimpers.

When he’d given the nipples enough attention, leaving them hard and red, he dropped his hands to Evan’s hips, pushing to get him positioned. Then Lou thrust straight into Evan’s prostate. Evan’s whole body jerked in Lou’s hands, breath coming in fast little pants, and Lou began to piston his hips, hammering Evan’s prostate.

He felt like he was so close to coming himself, but he was able to keep it somewhat distant as he focused on everything that was going on with Evan. His every little punched-out breath, his tremors, the high-pitched whines in the back of his throat.

Then Evan’s thighs started to shake almost violently, and a moment later, he was coming all over the bed.

The tremors in Evan’s muscles got worse when Lou didn’t let up. They’d discussed this exact thing, and Evan admitted it was hard to deal with, but he loved it to an unreasonable degree. It was something he’d discovered he liked in his own explorations, but he wasn’t able to get from his last relationship. Evan’s crying apparently had made his former lover uncomfortable, so it was something Evan strictly had to seek out on his own.

It wasn’t a competition, but Lou wasn’t letting his lover seek something he desperately wanted from a vibrator rather than from Lou. It wasn’t something they could or would do all the time, but Lou wanted Evan to know he absolutely could have what he wanted in this relationship.

He kept going, getting Evan so overstimulated that his whole body was shaking, and he was gasping and begging. The begging was nothing but breathy little, “please, please, please.” Then Evan was softly crying, every muscle twitching as he stayed the way Lou had put him.

Lou came. Abrupt, sharp, and so hard he almost blacked out. He kept thrusting, riding out the waves of orgasm as he bit into the meat of Evan’s shoulder.

When the intense sensations were over, he bore Evan down onto the bed, staying connected, until Evan was flat with Lou lying stretched out over him. Evan’s muscles were still shaking, his arms falling carelessly onto the bed.

It took Lou a little bit to get soft enough to slip out, so while he still had Evan’s hole stretched around him, he whispered, “You were starting to get hard again. Do you want to come?”

Evan was still for a long moment, muscles trembling, then he nodded, fingers twitching against the bedding. Lou reached under them, taking Evan’s cock in hand, stroking the way he’d learned Evan liked when he was chasing a second orgasm—a little firmer, a little extra hard on the head, a little extra stimulation than he normally wanted.

Crying out, Evan’s hips bucked against Lou, then as he came again. Then he went completely boneless, spread out, and limp. Lou licked over the reddish mark on Evan’s shoulder, earning a little moan. “Stay until I get soft? Or am I too heavy?”

“Don’t move,” Evan mumbled into the bedding.

Lou let himself relax, petting up Evan’s sweat-damp skin. His own clothes were sticking to him from the sweaty exertion, but he’d be able to clean up soon enough.

After a couple of minutes, Lou knew he was soft enough that the minute he twitched even the slightest, he’d slip out, and Evan was also stirring, stretching his arm out to find Lou’s hand, gripping it tightly.

“You okay?” Lou asked, kissing the back of Evan’s neck.

“So, so good,” Evan finally replied, turning his head to the side, so his face wasn’t buried in his arm and the bedding. “The clothed thing was hot as hell, but the downside is the post-coital cuddling isn’t as fun.”

“That can easily be remedied.” He petted over Evan’s damp curls, glad every day that the natural color was coming back.

“Mmm. Naked Lou.” Evan’s eyes were still closed, a soft smile stretching his lips.

“You sore?”

“What part of me?”

“The part we’ve been avoiding hurting for weeks. I figure your ass is sore, baby. You’re going to be sitting funny all weekend.”

“All weekend?” Evan cracked one eye open and twisted his neck to look at Lou. “I’m sore, but you didn’t get me that sore.”

“I hardly think I’m done with your ass.” Lou gave him a little smack on his hip.

Evan grinned. “Ooh. Yummy. And, no, my injury doesn’t feel flared up. We’re fine.”

“I’m going to get us cleaned up.”

“Lou…” Evan complained.

“And I’ll get naked in the process.

“I’ll accede to your terms.”

Lou laughed and gently disentangled himself from Evan, who hissed a little as Lou slid out. He took a moment to check Evan over. His hole looked red and a little swollen, but nothing time wouldn’t easily cure. He couldn’t stop himself from stroking over swollen tissues and carefully sliding two fingers back inside.

Evan hissed and bucked his hips. “Lou.”

“You doing okay?”

“Great.”

“Did we push too hard?”

“No. It was perfect.” Evan gyrated his hips slowly against Lou’s fingers. “I don’t get in the mood often, but it’s been so long, and I just really wanted it.”

Lou slid a third finger in while leaning down to press his lips to Evan’s ear. “I’ll always try to give you whatever you want.”

“You could get undressed and come back and keep doing that…”

“A little slow torment, huh? You must be sore.”

“So sore…”

Lou nipped his ear and gently removed his fingers. “I’ll be back in a minute.” He returned undressed, got them both cleaned up, then fulfilled Evan’s wish.

~*~

Lou woke to an empty bed, which was about a fifty/fifty chance with Evan. His lover would either be up cooking or be in bed reading, but he was, without fail, awake before Lou. They had a planless weekend, so everything was supposed to be taken as they went, other than lots of sex if Evan’s injury kept up with the change in activity. Which it had last night.

Evan had woken Lou in the middle of the night for a simple blowjob, but nothing about sex with Evan was simple. It was more connection with another person than Lou had ever known, so a simple bit of midnight horniness had more emotional impact that he was used to.

He could hear faint sounds that indicated Evan was in the kitchen, so Lou rolled out of bed and went through the business of morning ablutions and getting on some loose track pants. Neither of them was the robe-wearing type, but they both really liked looking at the other, so it wasn’t uncommon for them to be around the house in just shorts or loose pants of some sort.

He found Evan sitting at the bar, poking at his phone, nibbling on fruit from a large bowl. A quick glance at the kitchen showed Evan’s crepe pan was out, and there were two plates of breakfast crepes waiting, which were mostly fruit the way Evan made them, so they could be served room temp.

Lou leaned in and dropped a kiss on kiss on Evan’s mouth. “Morning.”

“Good morning.” Evan had a cushion on the bar stool.

Lou smirked a little as he got the plates and set them on the bar.

“Don’t be smug.”

“I certainly knew you were going to be sore.”

Evan sighed and pulled his plate over, dimming his phone.

Lou took a bite. “That’s heavenly. Thank you, sweetheart.”

“You’re welcome.”

Albert King was making like he was going to attempt a leap on the counter. Lou pointed his fork. “Don’t even think about it. You know I’ll just put you back on the floor, and you’ll just be cranky.”

Albert gave him a cranky look, flashed Lou his butt, and trotted away.

Lou watched his cat retreat to the office, which was where his cat bed was located, then he turned his attention back to Evan.

Evan shifted a bit on the barstool.

Lou reached out and took Evan’s chin between thumb and first two fingers. “Too sore?”

Evan shook his head. “I just like to fall apart sometimes, but I don’t see any reason to make myself miserable sitting on a wooden barstool without any padding.”

Lou nodded and kept eating.

“Too much for you? I mean, now that you’ve been through it?” Evan eventually asked.

Lou hesitated. “I don’t mind seeing you cry, darlin’, not if it’s something you’re enjoying.”

Evan gave a half smile. “Okay.”

“So, do you have any thoughts on what you’d like to do today?”

Evan gave him a sassy wink. “Keep the soreness level right about where it is?’

Lou barked a laugh. “Don’t want to go anywhere?”

“Maybe not today.”

“All right.” Lou nudged the phone. “Texting?”

“Nah. I told everyone I wasn’t available this weekend unless there was a zombie uprising.”

“Please don’t tempt fate.”

“Fair point. No, I was working on some more playlists.”

“You have hundreds. What’s the new theme?”

“I wanted to really grab our favorites onto a couple of lists. I think if I put all our favorites, it’d be hundreds of songs long. I’m having a hard time narrowing it down.”

“Maybe let it be hundreds of songs, and then you can parse it by genre or just songs that play well together.”

“Hmm. That’s a good idea. I put your protein smoothie in the fridge; I already had mine.”

“Oh, thanks.” Lou got up to get his morning protein boost. A lot of meat in the morning didn’t sit well with him, so he tended to eat his biggest portions of meat for lunch and plant-based or whey protein sources for breakfast.

Lou used to just have plain protein shakes, but Evan was very involved in cooking and nutrition, so he made more elaborate smoothies. Lou had eventually given in with good grace on that front, taking over the bulk of the kitchen cleaning himself. They both enjoyed the division of labor. Lou loved having great food, and he’d be cleaning the kitchen anyway for less good results. And Evan would be cooking no matter what, and now he didn’t have to clean up.

He’d just finished loading most of the dishes in the dishwasher when Evan looked up from his phone. “I’m not sure I have your actual favorite song on here. Or if I do, I don’t know it’s your favorite.”

“Hmm.” Lou wiped his hands on a towel and held out his hand for the phone. “Way back when, we said we’d have a talk about favorite song, but we never did.” He scrolled the list and didn’t see it, though many of his all-time favorites were there. He added it, but then hesitated before handing it back. “You have Fooled Around and Fell in Love on here.”

“It’s one of my favorites.”

“Mine too, but you have the artist as Mickey Thomas,” Lou said with a grin.

Evan made a face. “I edited my library.”

Lou couldn’t help but laugh.

“Elvin Bishop is an artist, not a band, and he didn’t sing that song! He’s got an entirely different voice, and people think he had vocal cord transplants or something. He could have released it as Elvin Bishop featuring Mickey Thomas, but no…”

Lou leaned over the corner of the island counter and kissed Evan. “I adore you.”

“Right back atcha, my love.”

Lou handed the phone back as he rounded the island and curled his arm around Evan’s waist.

Evan scrolled to see the addition, and his eyebrows shot up. “Really? I mean, it’s an amazing song, but…why?”

“I knew of the song, of course, but I really listened to it after my first real relationship ended. I was sitting in a bar, and it started to play. I really listened to the words, and I thought…someday. I think there was always this touch of ennui when it’d play. I’d wonder, ‘when is that mine?’ you know? And then there you were.”

Evan stared up at him, smiling, eyes shiny with unshed tears. “Wow, our stories are so similar. Though I hadn’t had a real relationship yet when I fell in love with mine.”

“I remember you said it was a mixed-up CD from your grandmother.”

“Yeah. She’d told me she was bringing me Sam Cooke, and she brought me Stevie Wonder instead.” He tapped a few times on his screen. “And I loved the song no matter what, but I really wanted to find the person who I could dance with and feel that way about.”

He held out his hand for Evan. “Come on, sweetheart. It’s our weekend to dance.” Lou happily pulled Evan into his arms as Evan pressed play on his phone and leaned over to set it aside as the strings began to play the first notes. Then the first soaring notes of Lou’s favorite song by Etta James filled the house.

At last
My love has come along
My lonely days are over
And life is like a song

“What’s your favorite line?” Evan whispered.

Lou waited for the line to come, then softly sang in Evan’s ear, “I found a dream that I could speak to; a dream that I can call my own.”

“Lou…”

He pressed a soft kiss to Evan’s mouth as they moved slowly around the dining room. “You smiled, you smiled; Oh, and then the spell was cast.”

Evan chuckled, resting his head on Lou’s shoulder. “I love that this is your favorite.”

“I feel like it was meant for us.”

Evan curled his arms around Lou’s neck. “You may have to find a new favorite if that’s our song.”

Lou grinned and dropped another kiss on Evan’s soft lips. “Maybe Fooled Around and Fell in Love.”

“We fell in love and then fooled around,” Evan countered with a smile that seemed to be reserved just for Lou—soft, open, and so happy.

“I suppose that’s true.” Then the next song began to play, and Lou was a little startled because he’d always found that particular Stevie Wonder song a little poignant and sad.

They danced slowly, and Lou listened to the words intently. Then, in the second verse, Evan reached up to frame his face and make eye contact, singing along softly. “When the truths of love are planted firm; They won’t be hard to find; And the words of love I speak to you; Will echo in my mind.”

Lou couldn’t help but back Evan into a wall and claim that perfect, luscious mouth, holding on tightly as Stevie Wonder began the repeat of the chorus that filled the house with its promise.

I believe when I fall in love with you it will be forever
I believe when I fall in love this time it will be forever

I believe when I fall in love with you it will be forever
I believe when I fall in love this time it will be forever

I believe when I fall in love with you it will be forever
I believe when I fall in love this time it will be forever

The End

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Musical performers are mentioned in line. Snippets of lyrics are occasionally quoted. Attributions:

• Get Here: Lyrics by Brenda Russell
• We’ve Got Tonight: Lyrics by Bob Seger
• Caught up in You: Lyrics by Don Barnes, Jeff Carlisi, Jim Peterik, Frankie Sullivan
• Hold on Loosely: Lyrics by Don Barnes, Jeff Carlisi, Jim Peterik
• Heaven: Lyrics by Bryan Adams and Jim Vallance
• Lovely Day: Lyrics by Bill Withers and Skip Scarborough
• Let’s Stay Together: Al Green, Willie Mitchell, Al Jackson Jr.
• At Last: Lyrics by Mack Gordon and Harry Warren
• I Believe (When I Fall in Love It Will Be Forever): Lyrics by Stevie Wonder and Yvonne Wright
• Time of the Season: Lyrics by Rod Argent

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