Reading Time: 100 Minutes

Title: Buck Begins
Series: Life, Love, and a New Way of Living
Series Order: 1
Author: Hourstillnoon
Fandom: 9-1-1
Genre: Angst, Contemporary, Drama, Family, Hurt/Comfort
Relationship(s): Evan “Buck” Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Content Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Hurt Evan Buckley, Amputee Evan Buckley, car crash, minor character death, domestic violence, character bashing, Car accident, abandonment, false accusations of murder, parent murdered in front of child (light description), self-deprecation, mentions of suicide, bullying, death threats, tsunami
Word Count: 50,570
Summary: Buck finds out Doug is abusing Maddie before he runs away in her Jeep. When he confronts Doug, it changes his life forever, turning the course of his life onto a different path. With this new path comes new difficulties. Can Buck accept the love his new family is willing to give?
Artist: Nightsong21133

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Chapter Six

As the months progress, Buck gets more comfortable at his job. He gets more confident in his assessments, and is able to do some field work as well. They’re understanding when he has a bad pain day and has to use either his crutches or his wheelchair, but that doesn’t happen as often after six years of having his leg amputated. More often than not when he’s using his crutches or wheelchair it’s for ease. He gets along with everyone at his job and is excited to advance more into his specialized field of DNA. He works with someone who has experience with DNA but did not get a Master’s degree. Buck was hired to cover a blind spot in their staffing, so she’s training Buck on more of the processes with DNA specifically before moving into a more general forensic scientist role, like she originally wanted. It helps them both get what they want.

With his job comes a few instances of working with Athena. She will sometimes come to him with evidence that needs processed and analyzed before landing on her desk or the detective she is working with in that moment. It’s strange, but Buck can’t say he minds much, honestly. They both act as professionals on the job, as Buck is finding with anyone he works with. There are a few people who will try to rush him on his work, but he doesn’t allow anyone to rush the work he does. If they don’t like it, he instructs them to go over his head to his boss. He has yet to get a write-up.

Home life is interesting. May’s therapy is going well. Buck was worried about moving out so soon after her bullying experience, but he plans to talk to Michael and Athena about that once May and Harry have gone to bed. Michael and Athena seem to be getting along much better. They aren’t as close as they were when they first took him in, but they seem to be working on being friends first. Since they both refuse to let Buck pay rent or for any groceries, he has a lot saved up for a decent amount of rent for his first apartment. Since he needs to be picky with his apartment, it’s a good idea to have enough in savings. He had very little left of his sperm and egg donor’s guilt money, but he left school with no debt, which is the most important thing to him. With his education, he was able to get a really good job with a good salary.

“We have decided that it is best if we get a divorce.” Michael starts, shortly after the family had finished eating supper.

“I thought everything was okay now.” Harry comments.

“It is. But, we also want room to grow better as friends, and relearn ways to be happy outside of a marriage.” Athena tells her kids.

“Will you date other people?” May asks.

“Probably, in the future. We won’t stay single forever, but for right now, we’re just thinking about the best way to be happy as people and parents.” Michael tells his daughter.

“Does this mean that we’ll have two houses?” Harry asks.

“Maybe not houses, but I am moving out. I’m looking at apartments right now, and will move out when I find one. Probably with three bedrooms.” Michael looks over at Buck at that. “We’d have to get a pullout bed or bunk bed in one room if you’re okay sharing with Harry, Buck.”

“That would be so cool! I could have the top bunk, and it would be like we were having a sleepover in each other’s room! Right, Buck?” Harry says excitedly.

“Right!” Buck looks at Michael next. “I think bunk beds could work.”

Once the talk is done, Buck, Harry, and May clean up, then the two youngest go on to do their own thing for the evening.

“Hey, can I talk to you two about something?” Buck asks his adoptive parents.

“Yeah. Is everything alright? Did you have questions about stuff you didn’t want to ask in front of the kids?” Athena asks.

“Kind of? Not about the divorce, though.”

“Okay.” Michael pauses the show they were watching, the two giving Buck their full attention. “What did you want to talk to us about?”

“I’ve been thinking since I finished school about moving out, getting an apartment. I want your opinion on it.” Buck tells them.

Athena and Michael share a look.

“Well… if that’s what you want to do, then we won’t stop you. But I don’t mind you staying here for as long as you’d like. You can stay until you can afford a house, if you’d like. Then you don’t have to worry about renting a place while trying to save up for a house. Along with that, it’ll be easier to make a house you own accessible enough for you and be able to make changes as you need.” Athena offers.

“Are you sure? I don’t want to be in your way.”

“How many times have we told you, you aren’t in the way?” Athena reassures, “We love having you here, and I know if you moved out the kids would miss their brother. Plus, a little selfishly, it’s nice to have the extra help with the kids.”

“Okay. As long as you’re sure.”

Michael speaks up at this, “It might not be a bad idea, either, for you to save up for a house. Then, you can help May and Harry with the transition between homes for the first little while as we all get used to living separately.”

“That’s true. I can drive them between houses on whatever custody schedule you two figure out for May and Harry. I also know Harry was excited for the concept of a Buck-Harry sleepover.” Buck admits with a smile.

“I don’t want you to think we’re relying on you to be a third parent. We just think it would be better for everyone if all three kids were under the same roof while we make this transition as a family. You’ve been a really good support for the kids when they haven’t wanted to talk to a parent.” Michael tells Buck.

“I know you don’t. I have never been expected to parent those kids. Anything I’ve done has been for them as well as myself. Plus, I’m sure the free babysitting didn’t hurt either.” Buck jokes.

“Don’t start with that. We tried to pay you. You refused, remember?” Athena reminds her oldest.

“Yes, mom.” Buck agrees quickly.

Athena rolls her eyes with a fond smile.

“You could get away with anything just by calling her mom, you know.” Michael informs.

Buck smiles, winking at him, “I know, dad.”

“Oh, don’t start that now. What do you need to suck up for?” Michael asks suspiciously.

“Nothing. Can I not call the best dad I’ve had by his well-deserved title?” Buck asks, trying to look innocent.

“Not like it’s a fair competition.” Athena comments.

“So, you’ll stay? Give yourself time to save for a house?” Michael asks.

“Yes, I’ll stay. I honestly love living here, I just felt like it was something I should have to do, apartment hunting and moving out.” Buck comments.

“Not if you don’t want to. Might as well give yourself every advantage you can.” Athena reassures him.

“Okay. I’m glad we got this all figured out.” Buck says, standing. “Goodnight. Got an early day tomorrow.”

“Goodnight.” The two call out in unison.

***

Michael moves out a month later as divorce proceedings begin. Because it’s an amicable split, they have a loose 50/50 custody agreement in place as well as splitting all marital assets evenly. Athena gets the house. Buck helps out by making sure to take May and Harry out a couple times when lawyers come over. It’s an easy process, and the two get everything done as quick as they can to make everything easier on everyone involved. Michael even enlists the help of his three kids when he buys all new furniture for his apartment.

Harry picks out the bunk bed for their shared space, as well as the other furniture for the room with Buck’s input. Buck gives May suggestions on what to pick out for her room. Buck and Michael let May and Harry pick out the living room furniture while Buck and Michael pick out the dining room set. It’s a good afternoon out for the four of them. They have a week before Michael moves into his apartment, the delivery day set for then.

A week later, Buck and Athena are helping Michael move in while May and Harry are with friends. “Well, looks like all the furniture is in place. Did you get enough kitchen supplies?” Athena asks.

“Yes. Me and Buck moved it up earlier this morning while you were dropping May and Harry off.” Michael responds.

“Okay, perfect. Looks like we have some time to sit and relax before I pick up the kids and come back for supper.” Athena says.

“You ready for your first night alone in your house, mom?” Buck asks.

“Not even kind of.”

“You’ll be okay. They’ll be back with you soon. Plus, I’m sure if you miss the company, you can always come visit. Or have Hen over, you’ll be able to get properly drunk without worrying about Buck interrupting again.”

“That’s true. Last time he did invade our party of two.”

“Hey! That’s not fair. I was invited, I didn’t invade.” Buck defends.

“We were drunk. We didn’t know what we were getting ourselves into at the time.”

“Right.” Buck replies sarcastically.

“So, Michael. How’re the dating apps treating you?” Athena diverts.

“You signed up for a dating app?” Buck questions.

“Yes. I made him an account, he was very reluctant.” Athena points out.

“Only because I’ve heard horror stories about them.” Michael defends.

“You should have a healthy fear of them. Now, come on, open it up, let’s see what matches you have.” Buck holds out his hand.

Michael gives in, handing his son the open dating app. Buck places it down on the table between everyone.

“Oh, avoid him.” Buck advises of one of his matches. “He’s an ass. He was very touchy and persistent.”

“And how would you know that?” Athena asks.

Buck hesitates a moment. “I met him at a bar. He eventually left me alone after I left with someone else, but it took a while for the other guy to convince him we were together.”

“Why were you out searching for people at a bar?”

“I was in college. It was part of the fun. Plus, a lot of the people I knew from school used that bar for meeting people, and I’d already met everyone worthwhile at the school.”

“Anyone else you recognize, Buck?” Michael asks curiously.

“I met up with this guy,” Buck holds up the phone to another profile.

Before Buck can say anything else, Michael swipes left.

“I was going to say he was a gentleman!” Buck informs.

“I don’t care. Anyone you’ve met, I’d rather not also have an encounter with.”

“Fair enough. Does that mean you’ll run anyone you plan to date by me first?” Buck replies.

“Only if you think you’ve dated many people above 40.” Michael tells him.

“Not a lot. I can make a list of their names for you to have. Most of the older people were women-“

“I don’t need a list of your hookups. I think I’ll just go with trial and error. That seems better than getting those details from my son.” Michael interrupts.

“I’m glad you could stop him before he went further with his explanation. If I wasn’t drunk, I would have burned my ears out when Hen was last over. That was too much information for your mother to have to hear, Buckaroo.” Athena tells her son.

“I could hear Hen cackling from inside the house.” Michael laughs. “Glad I stayed inside for that one.”

“I wish I’d gone inside before he started.”

“It wasn’t that bad!” Buck exclaims.

“Buck, you started listing your hookups from best to worst. You named some of them. I have to work with some of them now. I’m not sure how much worse it could have gotten.” Athena gives him a look.

“I could have given more detail.”

“The details you gave were enough.” Athena replies.

They spent the rest of their time teasing Buck and trying to set Michael up on a date. They successfully prompted Michael into talking to a few men, but overall he seemed disinterested as soon as they asked for a hookup. Soon, Athena was leaving to collect May and Harry, then the family was sitting down to eat for the first time together in Michael’s apartment. Athena leaves for the night after they clean up, hugging each of her kids before she goes.

“I’ll miss you.” Athena tells them.

“Mom, we’ll only be gone a week. You’ll be fine.” Harry tells her, shooing away her kiss.

Buck smirks. “Yeah, mom. We’ll be fine.”

Athena swats at him.

“Bye, ‘Thena. I’ll make sure to send them your way if they start missing you too much.” Michael reassures his ex-wife.

“You better. Don’t be a stranger.” She tells him, hugging him.

“I won’t.”

With that, Athena leaves, and the four of them are left to their first night in Michael’s new apartment together.

***

Too soon, the one year anniversary of Buck starting at the LAPD is approaching. With this, he decides it’s finally time to start looking for a house. He knows that he wants something all one level, with no stairs leading up to the house. He wants at least three bedrooms so Harry and May can have a place to sleep if they stay over. He also wants a good kitchen so he can cook in it, something he’s grown to love since Michael and Athena taught him to when he first moved in. Everything else in the house isn’t as strict, so long as there’s enough room for his wheelchair to move around in.

He approaches Michael and Athena one day, asking for their help house hunting. They both agree, and the three of them start looking for a house together. Buck gets in contact with a realtor and Buck sets up an appointment to go over budget and requirements. Once that’s all set up, it’s a matter of setting up times that Michael, Athena, and Buck were free to look at them.

Most of the houses they looked at needed a lot of work, either additions to make it more accessible, or just renovations to make it livable. It was hard for Buck not to give up hope of finding something livable for him to buy, let alone perfect. Athena and Michael were trying to be supportive, but there was only so much reassurance they could give him.

His realtor notifies him of a new house on the market that she is showing soon. It has yet to be viewed, but there’s an open house later that week. Buck calls his parents and they find the time to stop in during the hours. As soon as they pull up, Buck in his wheelchair, they notice how level the house is. It doesn’t have any steps going into the house. There are a few cars outside. When they approach, they see at least two couples inside, with his realtor. He wheels himself in. It’s impressive. It has an open concept kitchen and dining area, with an island. The island has enough room for Buck to wheel around it with no issues at all. The dining area looks out over the front yard. Behind the kitchen is a good-sized living room area. It’s not super big, but it’s spacious enough. From there is a back yard area. It’s not a huge yard, but big enough that he could have a few people over if he wanted. There was a paved area that he could put a barbecue in, and would be easy to wheel around on if he needed.

The hallway off the living room had two bedrooms on each side. One bedroom had an ensuite. It already had a walk-in shower, but no railings and no seat. The other bathroom in the house had the same set up as the ensuite did. At the end of the hallway was a big laundry room with an attached storage closet. Plus, it was a 10 minute drive from Athena’s place, and a 20 minute drive from work.

Once the three of them had gone through their tour, they quietly discussed among themselves off to the side. Michael couldn’t see anything wrong with the house structurally just from looking, which put it above a lot of the houses he had already looked at. While it did need some updates to the bathrooms, overall it was very accessible. If all he would need to update would be the bathrooms, that was perfectly fine with Buck. There was never going to be a perfect house without them having to add anything to it. With Athena and Michael’s approval and encouragement, Buck approached his realtor to place an offer. They were the last to come to the open house as it was the best time they could go, so she closed up the house after they approached her.

“So, I know the owners are looking for a quick sell on this one. I can definitely put in a good word for you, but I know they have a few offers already on the table. I can’t tell you how much they put it, but I can say that I recommend offering at least asking price. They’re not looking to counter any offers, just to sell to whoever they think is the best fit. I know how long you’ve been looking for something like this to pop up. I can try my best without influencing their decision.”

“Thanks, I appreciate that. I think I’ll offer asking price.”

“Okay. I’ll get you to sign here, then I’m off to meet up with the owners. I’ll contact you tomorrow morning on their decision.”

***

Buck waited impatiently by the phone the next day. At one point, Athena tried to get Harry to distract him. It worked for a bit, until Harry got bored with playing babysitter of someone who jumped every time a notification would go off on anyone’s phone. Harry abandoned his brother to do more interesting things.

It was almost the end of the day when Buck’s phone finally rang. He answered before the first ring could finish.

“Hello?”

“Buck? Hi, I have some good news. The owners accepted your offer. A month after you sign, you will be the owner of a house, as long as the inspection goes through fine.”

Buck lets out a relieved sigh. “Thank you. That’s good to hear. Is there anything I need to sign?”

“Not until we get the inspection done. I have your preferred company. I will call them tomorrow and set up a time for them to come by, then I’ll let you know so you can have someone there. Ideally, after that, I will get you into my office to sign the papers, then you’ll get your official takeover date.”

“Okay, sounds good. I look forward to hearing from you.”

When Buck got the inspection date, he called Michael to see if he was able to go to the appointment. It worked out, and a couple days later, Buck was walking into his realtor’s office, ready to sign to get his new house. The next month was the slowest month that Buck had ever gone through, including the month he was in the hospital after his amputation. Once he officially had the keys, he set up some contractors to redo the bathrooms and paint, then he had the locks changed.

He got May and Harry’s help with picking out his furniture for the living room, and the rooms he would designate as theirs, making sure they would be comfortable in his home. Soon, he was moving into his very own home, having a place of his own for the first time.

***

“Hey, baby. Thanks for joining us.” Athena greets her son as he walks into his old home.

“Of course. I miss my family.” Buck greets back.

“We’re always happy to have you, so visit any time.” Athena reassures.

“So, what’d you make?” Buck questions, taking a seat beside May.

“A lasagna, your favourite.” Athena tells the kids.

“My favourite? Trying to suck up?” Buck asks.

“Oh shush. It’s the first time you’ve been back since you moved out. Am I not allowed to treat my oldest son?”

“I guess I shouldn’t complain then.”

“No, you shouldn’t.” Athena tells him.

The four of them start eating, not talking much while they do so. Once the meal is done, Buck gets up to help May clear the table.

“Hold on a moment before you start cleaning. I want to talk to you all about something.” Athena tells her kids.

“Okay.” The three kids glance at each other, looking back at Athena.

“I am seeing someone.” Athena admits.

“Like, a therapist?” Buck asks.

“No. Like a man. I’m dating someone.”

“How long has it been?” May asks.

“A couple of months.” Athena tells them.

“Why’d you wait to tell us?” Buck asks.

“Well, we wanted to make sure we were more serious before telling anyone.”

“Do we know who it is?” Harry asks.

“Probably. It’s the captain of the 118 fire station.” Athena says.

“Bobby Nash?” Buck asks.

“Yes.”

“How did you start dating?” May questions.

“I ran into him at a bar after a tough call that we both had. We started dating after that.”

“Is he going to move in?” Harry asks. “My friend’s dad moved his girlfriend in after a short time. He doesn’t like her.”

“Not yet. We just started dating. I’ll make sure to talk to you all about it before it happens.”

“When do we get to meet him?” Buck grins.

“I don’t know yet.”

“Soon? I’d like to meet the man that my mom is dating.” Buck asks.

“We’ll see.” Athena gives Buck a knowing look.

“Come on, mom. You told us about him. That must mean you’re getting serious. We should be able to meet your boyfriend.” May starts in.

“Yeah, mom!” Harry joins.

“Oh, not you too.” Athena tells her youngest.

“We’ll be nice!” May throws in.

“Oh, alright. I’ll talk to him, see if he wants to. If not, then he won’t. I’ll let you all know.” Athena gives in.

“Thanks!” Buck cheerfully states, getting up to start clearing the table. May joins, nudging Harry as she passes him. Harry swats back at May, staying put.

“Just for that, you’re washing!” May tells her younger brother.

“No! That’s not fair. I washed yesterday!” Harry whines.

“Well, then you should have gotten up when we did.” May argues.

They keep bickering, Harry keeping his seat at the table.

“Children! That’s enough! Harry, wash the dishes. May, dry them. Buck, put away the leftovers. Take a container for your lunch.” Athena instructs.

“Moooom! May should wash!” Harry tries to argue.

“Too bad. I already assigned your roles, now get to it. The sooner this is done, the sooner you get to play video games.”

Hearing that, Harry jumped up, rushing to the sink to start washing dishes. Buck puts everything away, making sure to set aside a container for his lunch tomorrow. Once it’s done, he walks up to Athena.

“So, Captain Nash, huh?”

“Don’t start.” Athena tells him.

“I’ve heard the stories from Hen. He makes family meals but doesn’t let anyone get too close.”

“Yes, he does. I’ve gotten to know him in the last couple months. He’s opened up a lot to me.”

“Okay. I trust you.” Buck tells her.

“I appreciate your trust. Now, do you have enough food at home? I can send you home with some frozen leftovers.”

“Mom, I’m okay. I’ve been gone less than a week. I don’t need leftovers yet.” Buck tells her.

“Okay. Don’t be afraid to stop by for supper anytime. I love having you over, and like to know you’re being well-fed.”

Buck kisses her head, getting up to play video games with Harry.

“You ready to lose?” His brother goads.

“Nah, I’m gonna win.” Buck goads back.

“Don’t lie to yourself, Buck. You’re bad at video games.” May jumps in.

Buck gasps. “I’m hurt! Why would you accuse me of such thing! My own sister! How cruel!”

Harry gets them set up, and the two of them spend the evening playing video games until Harry’s bedtime. Once he’s in bed, Buck says his goodbyes to May and Athena, going back to his house. He grins at that thought.

***

It’s two weeks later when Athena sets up a time for the kids to meet Bobby. They sit down for supper, Buck giving the man a stern look. At Buck’s look, Bobby squirms in his seat.

“Buck, stop intimidating him. Be nice.” Athena scolds.

“But mom, he has to know that if he hurts you, I can hide the body!” Buck whines.

“No, you will not. I don’t need that kind of report on my desk.”

“But mooom.”

Athena glares behind her wine glass.

Buck turns to Bobby. “So, Bobby. How long have you been a firefighter?”

“Can’t the interrogation wait until after we finish eating?” Athena asks.

“It’s alright, Athena. I’ll answer any questions your kids have.” Bobby lays a comforting hand on Athena’s. “I’ve been a firefighter since I turned 22. I went into the fire academy after college, where I got a fire science and business degree. I followed in my dad’s footsteps.”

“How long have you been a captain?” May asks, tone pleasant.

“I got promoted about ten years ago, after my fire captain in St. Paul retired.”

“What brought you to LA?” Buck takes his turn asking questions between bites of potatoes.

This makes Bobby pause for a moment. “I needed a change of scenery. I’d been living in Minnesota my whole life and wanted a change.”

“Do you like LA?” May asks.

“I do. It’s been very nice.”

“What do you do for fun?” Harry asks next.

Bobby chuckles a little. “I don’t know. I sometimes go out with my team after a shift. I also take your mom out on dates.”

“So you don’t have many friends to do fun things with?” Harry asks.

“I guess not.” Bobby tells him honestly.

“Well, I guess we’ll just have to be your friends, then.” Harry says with conviction.

“Okay. I think I can get behind that.” Bobby tells Harry.

With Harry satisfied, May and Buck start up with their questions, asking about his family.

“I come from 4 generations of firefighter. I’m the only one who went to college, but my dad wanted me to have an education before I followed in his footsteps. I have a brother who became a lawyer. They’re all in Minnesota.”

“Mom and dad got divorced. Have you ever been divorced?” Harry asks, innocently.

“No. I have never been divorced.” Buck sees something flash in his eyes at Harry’s question, but decides to leave it.

“So, Bobby, what has been the best call in LA so far?” He asks.

“One of my first calls in LA, actually. It involves your mom. We got there, with a report of a stabbing victim. We try to locate the guy who did it, only to find a chicken. All of my team ran away, scared of the little thing. I caught him just as your mom shows up. She asks for the guy who did it, and I hand her the chicken in a towel. I think that impressed my team.”

“No way! That was you?” Buck asks. “I remember when mom came home that night. She was so mad at you!”

“I was. Some new guy handed off a chicken to me. I had to wait around for animal control to show up.” Athena looks a mixture of annoyed and amused.

The rest of supper goes smoothly, the kids getting up to clean up without arguing this time. Buck hears Bobby and Athena quietly talking, but he can’t make out what they’re saying. Looking over his shoulder, it looks serious. Buck focuses back on the dishes, handing a clean one to Harry to dry as May puts away the leftovers.

Once the evening is over, Buck walks Bobby to his car, leaving after he pulls out with one more warning not to hurt Athena.

***

The next day, Buck’s phone buzzes with a text

Hen: The firehouse is placing a bet on whether or not our captain is dating your mom. Want in?

Buck: Sure. What kind of bet? Any minimum?

Hen: Minimum is $20. You have to guess when you think it started, how it started, and if it’s serious. Closest one wins all of it, it’s split among those who are closest if there’s more than one

Buck: I’ll bet $50. I think it started two months ago to the date, I bet they ran into each other at a bar, and that it’s starting to get serious but isn’t that serious yet. How serious can it be until she tells her kids?

Hen: Good point. I’ll take it down, and next time we see each other I’ll get the money from you

Buck: Okay

Buck puts his phone away, grinning to himself.

It’s a month later when Hen texts him a picture of Bobby and Athena kissing at the station.

Hen: I’ll interrogate them over lunch. Let you know who won

Buck sends a thumbs up.

An hour later, Buck gets a call from Hen.

“I heard from a little birdie our winner already knew when I asked about the bet”

“I don’t know what you mean.” Buck replies, acting innocent.

“Yes you do. You met Bobby the night before and got all those details already. I think you should have to forfeit your winnings to buy us all lunch for that.”

“How about I take Denny to the zoo with me and Harry in two weeks, when both you and Karen have the day off, instead? I keep the winnings to cover the zoo costs, lunch, supper, and keep him and Harry for a sleepover.”

“Deal. I’ll hold off everyone else on arguing with me that a bet is a bet, you were just using previous knowledge to help, which we haven’t banned before.”

Buck laughs, planning with Hen to pick up his winnings when he picks up Denny for their zoo trip. Buck hangs up, texting Athena the plan to take Harry and Denny to the zoo in a couple weeks, asking if he can keep him for a sleepover. Athena agrees, telling him that she’ll tell Harry when she gets home tonight.

***

Two weeks later, Buck is at the zoo with Harry and Denny. They’re getting in line at the petting zoo, when Harry and Denny point out to Buck a kid around their age.

“Buck, can we ask if he wants to go into the petting zoo with us? It looks like it’s just the two of them, and then you and his dad can wait outside the gate for us.” Harry asks.

Buck takes a moment to look over. He sees a kid on crutches, it looks like he’s begging his dad to go into the petting zoo.

“Sure. I’ll go ask, but if he says no, then you’ll have to go in without him.” Buck tells them.

“If he does say no, can you still wait outside the gate for us?” Denny asks.

Buck sighs. “I’ll consider it. Wait here for me.”

Buck approaches the pair. He can hear the man telling the boy no, that they’ll go next time.

“Hey, I don’t mean to interrupt, but my brother and his friend wanted to know if your son could join them at the petting zoo.” Buck asks the man, trying to be a little quieter in case he said no.

The man looks up at him, assessing him. He looks over to where Buck pointed out Harry and Denny, looking back at Buck.

“If you say no, I’ll leave you be. No pressure.” Buck tells him.

The kid, having overheard everything, pipes in. “Please, dad? I’ll be good and eat all the vegetables that Abuela gives me tonight!”

The man looks down at his son, then back up to Buck. “Sure. I’d like to meet them first, though.”

“Of course!” Buck gets Harry and Denny’s attention, calling them over.

“Hi, I’m Harry, and this is Denny! That’s my brother Buck.” Harry introduces himself when he reaches them, looking at the kid.

“My name is Christopher!” The boy says. “My dad is Eddie.”

Eddie looks down at the boys, smiling at them. “So I hear you want to take Chris here into the petting zoo.”

The boys nod. “If you’re okay with it, you can wait here with Buck!”

“If you do that, you have to be careful not to jostle Chris too much, you wouldn’t want him to fall over.” Eddie tells them.

“I know how to be careful! I haven’t knocked Buck down yet and when he first came to live with us, he used his crutches a lot more than he does now!” Harry enthusiastically informs.

“Wow! You have crutches too? Can I see them?” Chris asks, looking up at Buck.

“I do. I got hurt a while ago and had to use them to help me walk. I don’t have them with me today, so I can’t show them to you.”

“Aww, okay.” Chris says.

“Okay. You can go in with them. But, you have to be careful not to get knocked down.”

“I know, dad!”

“Okay. Go on. We’ll be here. Wave if you need us.” Eddie tells all three boys.

Denny, Harry, and Chris get in line, waiting their turn.

“Do you often take your younger brother and his friends to the zoo?” Eddie asks.

“I try to have a day with both my brother and sister once a week. We used to call them Sibling Saturdays, but since my sister is a teenager now, she’s a lot less interested in spending time at the zoo with her lame brothers. I take Denny with us sometimes, wanting to give his parents a break and some time alone.”

“So you know his parents well, then?”

“Yeah. One of his moms is my mom’s best friend. I’ve known her since a few months after I moved in with them.”

“Are you adopted? Both Harry and you have mentioned you moving in with them.”

“Yeah. Harry’s parents adopted me as an adult. I had a rough accident seven years ago that left me without a leg. They took me in after I left the rehab center. My parents weren’t exactly very involved in my childhood.”

“I’m sorry, man.”

“Therapy has helped a lot with dealing with all that. Anyways, I’m sure you didn’t expect to have a stranger unloading his baggage on you when you came to the zoo with your son today.”

“Nah, man, it’s alright. I asked.” Eddie spills some of the soda he had on his shirt. “Damn. I’ll have to get my Abuela to get this stain out tonight.” Eddie rubs at it.

“Oh, I can help. I know how to get stains out of anything!” Buck enthusiastically announces.

Eddie looks up, eyes wide. “Uh…”

Realizing how his words could have been taken, Buck tries to backtrack, “Not like that! I mean, yeah, I could get that out of anything, but not what I meant! I’m a forensic scientist. Part of my training was removing stains from stuff. Especially blood.”

Eddie blushes. “I’ll, uh, keep that in mind.”

Eddie and Buck let silence fall between them, looking over at where the boys were. They had just gotten in, and the three of them were petting a goat together. Both Eddie and Buck hold up their phones to get a picture.

“They seem to be getting along well.” Buck comments.

“Yeah they do. Honestly, I’m glad you asked if Chris wanted to go in with them. I’ve been a little worried that he hasn’t made many friends since we moved here.” Eddie informs Buck.

“How long ago did you move?” Buck asks.

“We moved pretty recently, a few months ago. I joined the fire academy.”

“That’s cool! Have you gotten your station placement yet?”

“Yeah. I started a couple weeks ago. I’m at the 118, A shift.”

“No way! Denny is Hen’s son!” Buck tells him.

“Really? So your mom is Athena Grant?”

“Yes. Buck Grant at your service.”

Eddie gives him a look. “Your name is really legally Buck Grant?”

“Yeah. I changed it when they adopted me. I have no connection with the name my parents gave me, so changed it to something that I’ve been able to make my own.” Buck looks down at the ground.

“Your parents must be awful if they made you hate your name.”

“They weren’t abusive or anything. They just neglected me most of my childhood.”

“Still. That’s not good.”

As Buck opens his mouth to reply, the kids join them.

“Dad! Did you see us? We were petting the goats!” Chris laughs.

“I did, buddy! That’s pretty cool!”

“Can we spend the rest of the day with Harry and Denny?”

“Yeah, can we?” The two other boys pipe in.

Buck and Eddie share a look.

“Sure. Why not.” Eddie tells the boys.

All three cheer, then lead the adults along to the next exhibit. Buck spouts random facts about each new animal they see, Chris excited to hear everything, while Harry and Denny listen, having heard most of them before. At the end of the day, Chris and Eddie go to leave.

“Dad, do you think we can hang out with Harry and Denny again? I had fun.”

“We’ll see. How about this, I get Buck’s phone number, then we can see how things go, okay?”

Chris nods enthusiastically.

Buck gives Eddie his phone number. Eddie sends him a text so Buck also has his number. “Do you want me to take a picture of you two before you leave?”

Chris and Eddie agree. Then, Buck takes a picture of Chris with Denny and Harry. Next, Chris wanted a picture of Buck, then him with Buck and Eddie. Seeing all the pictures being taken, a nice lady offers to take one of all five of them. Buck sends Eddie all the pictures he’d taken over the day, Eddie doing the same thing.

“It was good meeting you, Buck. I hope to see you around.” Eddie says, leading Chris to the parking lot.

Buck then leads the boys to a restaurant in the zoo. From there, they go to Buck’s house. Both boys excited for their sleepover. Buck lets them do their own thing, picking up a book to read while the two play for the evening.

In the morning, Buck drives the boys home after making breakfast. He drops Harry off at Michael’s first, since it’s on the way and May was home, having not gone to church with Michael that morning. Taking Denny home, Buck steps in to say hi to Hen and Karen.

“Guess who I found at the zoo yesterday?” Buck asks the two.

“A gorilla?” Hen questions.

“Very funny. I found your new coworker Eddie with his son. Denny and Harry decided that they wanted to take Chris with them to the petting zoo.”

“Wait, really? I didn’t know he had a kid.” Hen comments.

“Yeah, his name’s Christopher. He looks to be around the boys’ age.”

“That works out well. Maybe they can all hang out more. I’ll have to extend that offer next time I have Harry over. Maybe give him some time to himself. Or with Chris’s mother. I don’t know the situation. He hasn’t mentioned anything to us.” Hen comments.

“Yeah, I’m sure he’ll appreciate that. Well, I should probably go. Got some cleaning up to do.”

“Bye, Buck. It was nice of you to take Denny for the night.”

Chapter Seven

Buck hears a knock on his door. He walks over to the door, opening it for his guests.

“Hey Chris! It’s good to see you! And you too, Eddie.”

“Wow! You do have crutches! That’s so cool!” Chris comments, noting Buck using his crutches. “Mine are cooler since they have stickers on them though.”

“Yeah they are a lot cooler. Maybe you can put some stickers on them next time we see each other!” Buck enthusiastically tells him.

“Yay!!!” Chris cheers, making his way over to the living room, where Harry and Denny are currently.

“So, you think you’ll see us again after this?” Eddie comments, closing the front door behind him.

“I’d bet on it. Chris likes me too much to not let you see me again.” Buck ribs, grinning.

“Ah, yes, use my son against me. I know it’s just him you want to see.”

“Yep! He’s the only reason that I invited you over here! Want a water or anything? I also have juice.” Buck offers.

“Water’s fine.”

Buck and Eddie go into the kitchen, grabbing a water each.

“So, I know the boys will want their privacy, but if you’d rather watch over them, we can go into the living room. Or we can stay in here. I have some snacks ready for a bit later, and then lasagna and garlic bread for supper. It’s my mom’s recipe.”

“No, we should be good to stay in here. We should be able to hear them if something goes wrong, right?”

At that, they hear a cheer from the direction of the living room.

“That answers that I guess.”

“Yeah. It’s pretty easy to hear anything going on from the living room in the kitchen. They share a wall.”

“I have to thank you for letting Hen know you ran into me. Since that moment, she’s been including me more in planning times for Chris to hang out with Denny, and even Harry when they all get together. I hadn’t told them about Chris yet.” Eddie says.

“Can I ask why not?”

“I honestly don’t know. I guess I wanted to make sure I could trust them first. I just moved here from Texas a few months ago and we just moved into a rental house. We were staying with my Abuela. I think I was stressed and worried about how it would look, being a single father who decided to be a firefighter, having to leave his kid alone with his Tia and Abuela while working.” Eddie comments.

“I can’t comment on many people from the firehouse, but I’ve grown closer to Hen since moving here. She’s one of the least judgmental people I know, but I understand not knowing how someone is going to react to something.”

“Yeah. It’s hard though, being a single father sometimes. I know I need to find help outside of my family. My Tia works full time, and my Abuela can’t always keep up with him. It’s just hard getting through the red tape.” Eddie comments.

“It’s hard, trying to figure out what is covered and what isn’t. When I first moved to LA, I was in a rehab care center. I was paying a high rate until one of the nurses sat down with me to help me figure it out. She also helped me get grants and government assistance when I went to UCLA. I still have regular contact with her, maybe I can ask her if she’d be willing to help you out with that next time I see her?” Buck asks.

“You’d do that?” Eddie asks.

“I would. I had a lot of people help put me back on my foot after my amputation when I was struggling. If I can pass that forward by helping someone else out in need, I want to.” Buck informs.

“Okay. Yeah. You have my number, don’t be afraid to use it.”

“Even if it’s not just for Chris?” Buck gets a teasing glint in his eyes.

“Especially then.” Eddie returns, placing his hand on Buck’s.

“BUCK!” Harry walks into the kitchen at that moment. “Where’d you put the snacks? We’re hungry.”

Buck shakes his head a little. “They’re in the fridge. There’s a lot, so I’ll help you bring them out.”

Buck gives Eddie a look, reluctantly pulling his hand from underneath Eddie’s warm one. He helps Harry get the snacks he had prepared, bringing them out to the three boys, making sure they had drinks and enough snacks.

“You’re really good with them.” Eddie comments once Buck is back in the kitchen.

“Yeah. May, my sister, would say that it’s because I’m a big kid myself.”

“I dunno, you seem pretty adult to me.” Eddie teases.

“I just really love kids, ya know? They have such good imaginations and such big hearts. It’s easier for them to open up and to see the good in the world. I don’t want them to have to see the bad ever, so if I can protect them from it, I will.” Buck tells Eddie.

“I know what you mean. I try to protect Chris every day from the hard stuff. His mom abandoned us when I was struggling, and my parents were no real help, wanting to take Chris for themselves instead of helping me to get back onto my feet. Honestly, if it wasn’t for the help of my sisters, I would have given Chris to my parents and been miserable.”

“Wait, they wanted to take him?”

“Yeah. When I decided to move to LA after I healed from an injury, my parents tried to convince me to leave Chris with them, and “not drag him down with me” according to my parents.” Eddie tells Buck.

“Well, that’s bullshit. From the few interactions I’ve seen you with Chris, you’re an amazing father. I can’t imagine anyone wanting to take him away from you.” Buck tells Eddie honestly.

“Thanks, Buck. I wasn’t always there for him, though. I know that’s what he remembers, but I abandoned him in a different way.”

“Okay. But you’re here now. He’s going to remember that.” Buck tells him.

“Yeah. I just worry that he’ll remember more that I abandoned him for the first four years of his life, you know?”

“I don’t mean to be intrusive, so feel free to tell me to fuck off, but did you leave his mother when you found out she was pregnant?”

“No, it’s okay. I enlisted into the Army when I found out, after we had a rush wedding. I used the excuse of needing the money, which was partly true, but I was also terrified. I came home for the birth, and then reenlisted when he got diagnosed with cerebral palsy, without talking to her first.”

“Okay. That can be seen as abandoning him in a way, but you came back. Did you keep in contact with them while you were away?”

“Yes. I missed them every day, and called and wrote every chance I got.”

“Does his mother call him? You mentioned she abandoned you both, not just left you.”

“No. She doesn’t. She left three years ago and hasn’t looked back.”

“I think he’d remember more who was there for him, and who made sure to contact him when they weren’t there physically.”

“Yeah I guess. I just worry about failing him, you know?”

“The only way you could fail him is if you didn’t love him. Kids need love, and they can feel when a parent doesn’t love them. You’re doing what’s best for your kid and he will know that.”

“Thanks. So, how did you end up getting adopted by Harry’s parents?” Eddie changes the subject.

“Oh, I see, you want the attention off yourself, so decided to dig deeper into my life. I get it.” Buck teases.

“Absolutely. Now that I’ve bared my heart and soul to you, it’s your turn.” Eddie throws back.

“Well, they came by the rehab center when I was there recovering. Their church encouraged them to go, to visit with the people there. I had spent basically a month alone in my room, isolating myself. One of the nurses there forced me out of my shell and encouraged me to get therapy. My therapist challenged me to go to the visitors’ event. I did, and May made good friends with me. After that, I got closer with all of them. They offered for me to live with them after I left the center. I agreed, and before I started college, they adopted me. They really saved me at a time in need and encouraged me to be the best I can. They supported me on my hardest days. I owe them a lot.”

“Wow. That’s amazing. I’m glad that they were able to be there for you when you needed them.”

“Yeah me too.”

***

Later that night, after Chris, Eddie, and Denny had gone home, Buck couldn’t help but let his mind wander to their continuous conversation in the kitchen. Not only is Eddie super nice and genuine, but he’s a good father and person. They had a moment before Harry had interrupted them, but Buck wasn’t sure how Eddie felt about it. It felt like more than just friendship to him, but they also just met and were starting to get to know each other better. Buck knew the way he was feeling. He could feel the start of his feelings towards Eddie growing. His good looks helped, but what was really going to make him fall was his genuine kindness and personality. He could already tell how absolutely screwed he was when it came to Eddie and Chris.

Buck falls asleep to plans on getting to know Eddie better, maybe even asking him on a date if he gets the chance. The worst he can do is say no, after all.

***

Over the next few weeks, Buck and Eddie text a lot more. Buck sets up a time for Eddie and Carla to have lunch at his place while Buck keeps Chris entertained. It turns out, introducing the two is the best thing he could have done. Carla moved to home health a few years ago, and had the availability to take on Chris as a patient. Because of his CP, and Eddie’s benefits as both a firefighter and veteran, he’s able to get funding for Chris for a home health aide, as well as for a smaller, more accessible private school.

Every time Buck’s phone goes off, he gets butterflies in his stomach and can’t help but grin.

“Oh, who’re you texting? You got a hot date?” May asks.

“No. I’m texting Eddie.”

“You setting up another playdate between Chris and Harry?” May raises her eyebrows.

“No. We’re just talking.”

“Okay. So it has nothing to do with the kids. Got it.” May gives Buck a pointed look.

“What?”

“Come on, Buck. Just ask him out. You’ve been texting him almost non-stop for the last couple weeks. I know you like him. Your grin says so every time you get a text from him.”

“I would, but he’s been so busy with work and trying to get everything set up between Chris and Carla. He wouldn’t have the time.”

“If he likes you as much as you like him, he’ll make time. I’m sure if you asked Hen or mom nicely, they would even watch Chris for Eddie while you two went out on a date.”

Buck glares at his sister.

“You know I have a point. If you don’t have the guts to ask him out, give me your phone and I will do it for you.” May holds out her hand.

“No. I’ll get around to it eventually.”

The oven goes off, so Buck gets up, leaving his phone on the table. He goes into the kitchen to pull the food out of the oven to check. He puts it back in, uncovered, to cook a little longer. As he comes back in, his phone starts ringing. Seeing the call is from Eddie, he picks it up immediately.

“Do you really want to go on a date with me?” Eddie asks, nervously.

“Uh…” Buck glances at May, who shrugs at him with a smile. “I… who told you that?”

“Buck… you did. You texted me a moment ago. Did you hit your head since you last looked at your phone?”

“No, I didn’t hit my head! I just…. Was trying to play it cool?” Buck glares at May.

“Is that a question?”

“No. I didn’t want you to feel pressured to say yes.”

“You don’t have to worry about that. I want to, if you do.” Eddie sounds nervous on the other end of the line.

“How does Tuesday sound? I know you’re off work that day.”

“I wish I could, but I have Chris. Carla doesn’t start until next week, and my Abuela and Tia are away right now, visiting my sisters.”

“Okay. Is there another day that works better?”

“I can watch him, if Eddie needs someone.” May offers.

Buck waves his hand at her.

“Give me the phone.” May requests.

“No. I’m using it.”

“Do you have someone over?” Eddie asks.

“Yeah, my sister.” Buck tells Eddie, having the phone ripped from his hand when he wasn’t paying attention.

“Hey Eddie, it’s May. Buck refused to pass on my message so I figured I would just talk to you myself.” May runs down the hallway, locking herself in her room.

“May, come on, give me back the phone.” Buck knocks on the door. He hears May’s voice on the other end, but she doesn’t open the door. “May. Stop bothering Eddie and give me the phone.”

Hearing the oven timer go off, Buck debates whether or not he wants their lunch to burn. He decides it’s not worth a burnt meal or broken door, so he leaves her be, taking their lunch out of the oven. He lets it cool for a few minutes, serving them each good portions, setting up the table with their preferred drinks. May had been in there for ten minutes before she emerges, handing Buck his phone, noticing that Eddie was no longer on the other end.

“Did you hang up on him?” Buck asks.

“No, the fire alarm went off. He had to go.” May shrugs, sitting down at the table. “This looks good.”

May ignores Buck’s questions, eating everything before she speaks up again.

“You have a date on Tuesday. You’re welcome. Oh, wear something fancy, but not too fancy. Dark jeans and a button up. The maroon one looks best with your black jeans. Eddie will pick you up at six. He’ll drop Chris off here with me, then when he drops you off, he’ll pick Chris up.”

“Seriously? You spent that time planning my date for me?”

“You clearly weren’t going to do it. I had to do it for you. You can thank me at the wedding.” May grins at him.

“May! We haven’t even been on a first date yet! There is no wedding!”

“Whatever you say.”

The two keep bickering as they clean up their mess. May spends the rest of their afternoon together catching him up on school, assuring him that she’s fine after her bully ended up back at school. She promises to come to him if she starts in on anyone, let alone May, again.

***

The few days between the date drag. Buck and Eddie text, but it’s not as often as usual. They’re both busy at work, and Eddie has quite a few interviews with different schools, trying to find the best fit for Chris.

On Tuesday, May’s teasing him about changing his shirt three times before ultimately deciding to wear the maroon one that she suggested over the weekend. In the middle of buttoning it up, there’s a knock at the door. He hears May answer it, greeting the two guests.

“Hey, you ready?” Buck asks, buttoning his last button as he comes into the entry way.

Looking up, he can’t help but gasp and stare. Eddie is wearing a navy long sleeved button up with black jeans. He looks stunning. Buck can’t tear his eyes away.

“Buck, dad! You’re being gross! Is this what I’ll have to deal with from now on?” Chris questions.

Buck tears his eyes away from Eddie to look at Chris, who is looking at May.

“Probably. If the two of them not being able to look away from each other says anything, that may be a regular occurrence now, Chris. But I’ll help you tease them for it.” May tells him.

Eddie clears his throat, his cheeks red as he looks at May. “Thank you. For watching him.”

“No problem. Now, get out of here before you two stand there and stare at each other all night. You don’t want to miss your reservation.” May shoves them out the door.

“Bye mijo. Be good for May. Listen to her, okay?” Eddie kneels in front of his son, kissing his forehead.

“I will. Bye dad.” Chris waves him off. “Have fun. Though I’m not sure how much fun you can have without me there.”

The two men chuckle, wishing May and Chris a good evening. Eddie leads Buck out to his truck, opening the door for him.

“Such a gentleman. Although, shouldn’t I be the one to court you like this? Considering I’m the one that asked you out.” Buck comments, waiting until Eddie has gotten into the drivers seat.

“If I remember correctly, May asked me out for you.” Eddie has a teasing glint in his eyes.

“She told you that?”

“Mhm. She did. She wanted to make sure credit went to the right person.” Eddie pulls out onto the street.

“Oh I see. Well, I guess it’ll be her fault if I mess this up, then.” Buck comments, only half teasing.

“I don’t think there’s anything you could do to mess this up, unless you were a murderer.” Eddie jokes. “You already like kids, and I can tell you love my kid, which just makes you better in my book.”

Buck falls silent, not knowing how to respond.

Eddie glances over at Buck. “Did I say something wrong?”

“No, no. It’s not that.”

“Then are you a murderer?” Eddie asks, a little more weary this time.

“It depends who you ask. According to my sister I am, but everyone else has done their best to convince me I’m not.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Eddie offers, placing his hand on Buck’s to squeeze, before returning it to the steering wheel.

“I don’t want to ruin our date before it even gets started.” Buck tells him.

“Talking about your past won’t ruin our date. I won’t pressure you into talking about it if you don’t want to, but if you feel comfortable and do want to talk about it, I will listen.”

Eddie pulls into the parking lot of the restaurant. He goes around to the passenger side while Buck thinks over his options. Eddie opens the door, startling Buck a little. Buck takes the hand Eddie offers, letting the other man lead him into the restaurant and to the table. They put in their drink order when the waiter comes up, taking some time to look over the menu.

“My sister’s husband was abusing her.” Buck starts.

Eddie looks up at him sharply.

“That’s how I got my amputation. I went to confront him and we got into an accident. It cost him his life and me my leg.”

“Okay. So why does she think you’re a murderer?” Eddie asks slowly.

“She blames me for him getting mad and crashing the car. Last time we talked, which was in the hospital room before I got my amputation, she accused me of murdering her husband and her brother.”

“Wait, you had a brother?”

Buck nods, continuing on with his story. “I didn’t know until she was accusing me of killing him. I was born as a saviour baby. He died of an infection after the bone marrow transplant when I was young. Both my parents and Maddie hid him from me for my entire life. One of the last things she said to me before she left was that I was useless, since I couldn’t save her brother and killed her husband.”

Buck and Eddie take a moment to order their food when the waiter comes back. It gives both men a moment to compose themselves.

Eddie takes a deep breath. “Wow. I can’t imagine telling someone I love that they had murdered someone when it was so clearly not their fault. How did your parents react to that?”

“They agreed with Maddie. They abandoned me, telling me that they would not allow me to move back in with them to recover. They sent me on my way with guilt money and I haven’t heard from any of them since. I think it helps that I moved to LA and didn’t contact them once I left Pennsylvania. Now, enough about me. How’s the 118 so far?” Buck questions.

“It’s been good. Bobby is a good captain. My partner, Lucy, is nice enough. We get along and work well together. Hen and Chimney like to tease everyone.”

“Watch out for their bets. They can get pretty serious sometimes.”

“I’ve heard. Hen actually told me about how you swindled your way into winning the bet about your mom and Bobby.”

Buck laughs. “Yeah, we had met him the night before for supper officially as her boyfriend. I already knew the details that they didn’t, so it caused me to win the bet. I actually took Denny and Harry to the zoo with my winnings the day that we met you.” Buck comments.

“So I have Hen to thank for me meeting you, then?” Eddie questions.

“Yeah, I guess you do. And I have May to thank for setting this up.” Buck gives Eddie a smile as their food arrives.

They talk about work over supper and dessert, getting lost in talking to each other.

“Ready to go?” Eddie asks, holding out his arm for Buck.

Buck takes it, letting Eddie lead him to his truck. They’re both silent on the drive back to Buck’s. Before Buck can open the front door, Eddie stops him.

“You know you’re not at fault for your family, right? It’s not your fault how that went down.” Eddie lays a hand on Buck’s shoulder, near his collarbone, standing close.

Buck nods, staring into Eddie’s eyes, getting lost. “Yeah. A lot of therapy and a supportive family has helped me see that.”

Eddie nods, letting his eyes flicker down to Buck’s lips. Buck notices, his tongue flickering against his bottom lip nervously. Eddie lets himself be drawn in, slowly leaning forward. Their lips meet gently, the two of them moving together slowly in a gentle, soft kiss. They’re both grinning and blushing as they pull away.

“I had a really nice time tonight. Hopefully we can do this again soon.” Eddie tells him, kissing him again briefly.

Once Eddie pulls away, May opens the door behind Buck.

“How do you think mom would react if I told her I caught you making out on the front step with kids in the other room?” May teases.

“Shut it. We were just kissing, not making out.” Buck rolls his eyes.

“Either way. Come in, so I can go home. Mom’s texting me asking when I’ll be home.”

“Okay. I’m coming in. Say goodbye to Chris, then go. I don’t want mom on my butt about having you home late.” Buck hugs his sister, letting her go say goodbye to Chris.

“Chris, you ready to go, buddy?” Eddie asks his son.

Chris lets out a sigh. “Yes.”

“Okay. Get your shoes on and say goodbye to Buck.”

Chris does as he’s told, hugging Buck. “Thanks for letting me hang out at your house while dad took you on a date, Buck.”

“You’re welcome, Superman. I love having you over.” Buck hugs him back.

Once Chris was ready to go, Eddie leads him out the door. He stops briefly to peck Buck on the lips, saying goodbye as he helps his son into his truck. Buck waits by the door until they pull out, closing the door after the best first date he’s ever had.

***

Over the next couple months, Buck and Eddie go on a few more dates. They text constantly, and can both feel their relationship getting more serious.

“Before we get much more serious, I want to talk to you about something.” Eddie starts one night after Chris is in bed.

“Okay.” Buck says hesitantly.

“I’m technically still married.” Eddie says.

Buck blinks at Eddie in surprise.

“After Shannon left, I never filed for divorce. I initially hoped that she was coming back, or that she’d call and talk to Chris. After a year of no contact, I assumed that she wasn’t coming back. I just never got around to finding a lawyer and filing for divorce. Then, when I moved to LA, I tried to email her, letting her know that we were in LA, where I knew she last was. I never heard anything from her.”

“Why haven’t you filed for divorce? Do you still love her?” Buck can’t stop himself from asking.

“No. I haven’t been in love with her since that first year. A part of me loves her as Chris’s mother, but no longer as my wife. I have a lawyer now, and will be filing next week. I’ve been trying to get everything set up with Chris’s new school and that’s when I realized we never got divorced, which means we don’t have a custody agreement. I told the school that she hasn’t been in our life in three years, but they were free to try to contact her. They couldn’t get ahold of her, so made an exception in his file to admit him. They’d get the updated agreement about custody after the divorce went through.”

“Okay. That must’ve been tough on you two. Does Chris know that you tried to contact his mom?” Buck asks.

Eddie shakes his head. “I didn’t want to disappoint him if she didn’t come back. I think I made the right decision.”

“I think so too. You did what was best for him. I support you in this, Eddie. Whatever you think is best.”

“You’re seriously okay with everything?” Eddie questions.

“Yeah, I am.”

“Okay. Now that that’s done, I have a question.”

“What’s your question?”

“Will you be my boyfriend, officially? I know we’ve been building towards this for a while-“

Buck interrupts Eddie with a kiss. “Yes. I will be your boyfriend.”

Eddie grins, kissing Buck again. The two spend the rest of the evening kissing until Buck has to leave. Eddie offers for him to stay, and Buck was tempted. If he hadn’t left his work uniform at home, he would have. He promises for another time, leaving before he agrees anyways.

Chapter Eight

“Mom! I’m home!” Buck calls out, walking into his mom’s living room.

The sight that greets him has him screaming. Bobby is naked, on the couch, eyes wide. His mom, also naked, is in the kitchen.

“Oh my eyes! Ah! What are you doing?” Buck covers his eyes.

“I thought you were coming over in a couple hours after work! May and Harry aren’t home from school yet!” Athena informs. “Now, please go out to the back deck while we get dressed. I’ll come get you.”

Buck peeks through his fingers so he can get to the back deck without running into anything. As he does, he texts Eddie.

Buck: I have been scarred for life.

Eddie: What happened is everything okay?

Buck: I got off work early so I decided to go over to mom’s early. We’re supposed to have supper tonight. I didn’t know Bobby was over… I caught them… naked… both of them…

Eddie: Were they in the… middle of something?

Buck: Oh god, I don’t want to think about that. Bobby was on the couch, mom was in the kitchen. I will never enter this house again without knocking.

Eddie: I don’t know why you thought not knocking when you were early was a good idea in the first place

Buck: I didn’t know Bobby was going to be here!

Athena comes out the door, fully dressed.

“Oh good, I see you decided to get dressed.” Buck glares.

“You’re the one who walked in, early, might I add.”

“I texted you to let you know I was off early!” Buck defends.

“Did I answer?” Athena asks her son.

“Do you ever answer when I tell you that?”

Athena doesn’t respond, looking away. “I’m sorry you had to see that.”

“Thank you. I appreciate the apology. Now, maybe chain the door when you and Bobby are… Ugh, I can’t even say it.”

“What, you can’t think about your mother having sex?”

“Ew, don’t say it!” Buck yells, covering his ears.

Athena cackles, continuing to tease Buck. Buck, Bobby, and Athena spend the rest of the afternoon outside, Buck talking to them about how him and Eddie are doing. They go back inside once May and Harry have gotten home from school. Athena and Buck end up in the kitchen making supper. Once everyone has eaten and Bobby has left, Athena speaks up.

“I wanted to talk to everyone about something.”

“Okay, mom, what is it?” May sits back down at the table.

“I want to know how all three of you would feel about Bobby moving in. We’re getting more serious and I want your thoughts before I ask him.”

“I get May and Harry because they live here too, but why me?” Buck asks.

“Because. You are my son. You may not live here anymore, but you still have a home here. This decision will affect you too. You will be seeing more of Bobby.”

“Oh.” Buck takes a moment to think.” I’m okay with it.”

“Me too!” Harry agrees excitedly.

“May?” Athena asks.

“I’m okay with it. I like Bobby, he’s nice. Does dad know?”

“Yes. I had a conversation with your father over lunch.”

“He was okay with it?”

“He suggested it, actually. He asked if I had thought about Bobby moving in yet since it’s coming up on a year since we officially got together.”

“Does that mean you’ll talk to him about moving in soon?” Harry asks.

“Yes. We have a date set for Friday, so I’ll talk to him then. You three will be the first to know.” Athena reassures.

“Okay.” All three agree.

***

Bobby moves in a month later, right before he gets suspended from work.

“Mom, did you know what happened?” Buck asks, meeting up with her for lunch the next day.

“Yes. He talked to me about his family early on. I’m currently trying to distract him from everything.” Athena tells him. “I appreciate you for looking out for me, but you have nothing to worry about.”

“Okay. Well, if you want something to distract him, you could throw a welcome party at the house welcoming Bobby to the house. You could invite a couple of your work friends, and the 118, Michael, everyone.”

“That’s a good idea. I’ll bring it up to him, see if he wants to plan it. Thanks.”

The rest of lunch goes well, passing quicker than Buck would like. After, Buck goes to Eddie’s.

“I officially sent the divorce papers.” Eddie tells Buck as soon as he walks in, having gotten a key the day before.

“How do you feel?” Buck asks, hugging his boyfriend.

“I don’t know. Relieved, sad. It’ll be nice to finally be divorced, but I’m also sad. If she hasn’t come back yet and doesn’t once we’re divorced, I don’t know if she will. It will break Chris’s heart if he never sees his mom again. I also thought when we got married that we would be together forever. Having those plans change is for the best, but a part of me is sad over not having that life anymore.”

Buck hugs Eddie, letting him get it all out. When the two have had the time they need to process, they both see texts on their phone.

Momma Bear: Bobby agreed to the party. He’s already in planning mode. Planning for two weeks. The 118 have it off, and so does everyone else we would want to invite.

Buck sends off a thumbs up, letting her know he’ll be there.

“Bobby and Athena are hosting a party.” Eddie comments.

“Yeah, mom just texted me. You want to go together? Maybe I can stay over that night.” Buck asks.

“Yeah of course. I’d like that.” Eddie agrees. “Maybe I can convince Hen to take Chris that night for a sleepover.”

“I like that idea.”

“Okay. I’ll see what I can do at work tomorrow. Maybe Chimney will bring his mysterious girlfriend.”

“Chimney has a girlfriend?” Buck asks.

“Yeah. He’s been smiling at his phone a bunch. All we know about her is she moved here after travelling around a bunch, and that she works at dispatch.”

“Mysterious. Any theories?”

“I don’t know, honestly. I don’t know many people from dispatch to know any new people who showed up. Bobby’s the one who communicates with dispatch more on calls.”

“Maybe you can get Hen on your side and convince him to bring her. It would be the perfect time to introduce everyone to her. She won’t be the center of attention and it will be a big gathering. Easy to get everyone at once.”

“Yeah, I’ll try that. Thanks.” Eddie pecks Buck on the lips.

“You can do better.” Buck tells him.

Eddie does, dragging Buck to the bedroom while they still have the house to themselves.

***

Two weeks later, Buck drags Eddie and Chris to his mom’s house early to help Bobby set up. Athena was going to be late, she had to go into the station to finalize paperwork for a case so would arrive once all the guests were there. Buck had been cooking while Bobby had started letting people in, greeting each guest as they came in. Buck half paid attention to who was coming in, but hadn’t started socializing yet. He loads his hands with appetizers, going outside to put them down on the table.

“So, Chimney, how did you two meet?” Buck hears Hen asking, looking between Chimney and the woman beside him, grabbing a bottle of beer.

“It’s funny, actually. We met in a coffee shop. We both got the same thing, so when the barista had called out the order, we both walked up to the counter. We hit it off from there.” Chimney responds.

“You make it sound so sweet, when I almost bit your head off for grabbing my coffee.”

Buck’s world tilts, hearing a familiar voice he never thought he’d hear again coming from the woman beside Chimney. Who’s back was still to him. He feels the bottle in his hands slip and hears a shatter. He gets confirmation as both Chimney and the woman turn around, everyone else staring at Buck as well.

“Evan? What are you doing here?” Maddie says in shock.

“Wait, Evan?” May turns to her brother, having walked up to him. “Is this who I think it is?”

Buck nods, not able to tear his eyes away from Maddie’s. Buck watches as May walks right up to Maddie.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

Maddie briefly glances away from Buck, turning to May. “I was invited. I’m Howie’s girlfriend.”

“You need to leave. You aren’t welcome here.” May tells her.

“I was invited. You can’t kick me out. Who are you, anyways?”

“I’m his sister.” May points behind her to Buck. “You know, the one that actually loves and cares about him. Oh, and his name is Buck. He hasn’t gone by Evan since he left the hospital.”

Buck can feel all eyes on him, Maddie, and May. It feels like too much as his breath starts coming in short bursts. He turns and runs back into the house, leaving everyone else to clean up his mess. He runs to his old room, closing the door behind him, diving onto the bed sobbing. He tunes out the shouts coming from outside, not wanting to know what was happening. Eventually everything quiets down. Buck hears a knock on the door before it opens and his mom slips in.

“Hey. I saw you storm in here as I was walking in the door. Do you want to talk about it?”

Buck just shakes his head.

“Can I come in?”

Buck nods.

Athena walks over to him, sitting beside him on the bed.

“You know, before Bobby started planning this party, we had a huge fight. It was so bad I almost kicked him out.” Athena starts running her hands through his curls, “he wanted to take everything from this room, put it into storage. He wanted a project, something to do while he was suspended. I refused to let him touch anything in this room until you yourself wanted to take anything from here. I left it as is, from the moment you started adding your own touch to the moment you moved out. He couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t want another spare room kicking around for guests. You know what I told him?”

Buck shakes his head.

“I told him that until you decide you were ready for this room to be taken apart, it would stay as is. You may not sleep in this room anymore, but this is still your home. I told him you deserve a parent that keeps your things around. A parent that loves you unconditionally, that doesn’t throw away your things like trash. You deserve to feel like your stuff is as important as you are. You are so important, Buck, no matter what anyone else tries to tell you.”

Athena falls silent at this.

“What happened?” Buck asks.

“Are you sure you want to know?”

“I need to know.”

“I walked in as you were running past me. You didn’t notice me. May was yelling at someone, so I decided to give you a moment alone. Maddie had started in on May, telling her nastily that she knows nothing. As I walk out, Eddie steps up to defend her. He goes off on her about her behaviour, then finishing with “but of course, he’s useless, so why would you want him around anyways?” as I watch Maddie flinch. Chimney speaks up, trying to tell us not to stress her out, that we shouldn’t be yelling at a pregnant woman. I tell him if he’s going to defend her, they can both get out. They try to argue and I threaten to arrest them for trespassing if they don’t leave my property immediately. They couldn’t leave fast enough.” Athena continues to run her fingers through his hair.

“She’s pregnant?”

“You didn’t notice? She has a pretty good bump.”

“I was a little too shocked to look anywhere but her face, honestly.”

“Okay. Well, you don’t have to leave if you don’t want. You can stay the night here. I can tell Eddie that you need the night.”

“No. I want to go home with him.”

“Okay. I think Hen’s still taking Chris. You can get Eddie to help you decompress. How does that sound?”

“Yeah. It sounds good.”

“Okay. Stay as long as you like. I’ll let Eddie know to wait around.”

Athena leaves him alone then, letting him have a moment alone. Buck composes himself, processing everything that just happened. It takes him a few minutes, but eventually he ends up leaving the room. Athena and Eddie are talking quietly on the couch while Bobby is outside with the few remaining people left in the yard. The two turn their heads as he approaches.

“Wanna get out of here?” Eddie asks.

Buck nods, letting Eddie take his hand and lead him outside. It’s a silent ride back to Eddie’s, neither wanting to break the silence.

“So, do you want to watch a movie when we get home or cuddle in bed?” Eddie asks when they’re almost home.

“Bed.” Buck answers.

“Okay.”

The two spend the rest of the day cuddled up in Eddie’s bed. Eddie lets Buck rant or cry as much as he needs, being there to support him. Buck falls asleep peacefully in Eddie’s arms, feeling content for the first time since seeing his sister again.

***

Buck wakes up to a kiss from Eddie.

“I’m going to get up and start on breakfast. You can stay here, rest a little more. I’ll come get you when it’s done.” Eddie says, getting up from the bed.

Buck lays in bed for another few minutes, finally deciding to get up and help Eddie with breakfast. Just as he’s about to leave the hallway, he hears an angry knock on the front door. He decides to wait in the hallway as Eddie opens the door.

Buck peeks around the corner, seeing a woman storm in.

“What the hell is this?!” The woman asks, holding up a yellow envelope.

Feeling the anger of the woman, Buck decides to sneakily get out his phone and start recording.

“I don’t know, Shannon. I can’t see in the closed envelope.” Eddie snarks back.

Shannon slams the envelope down onto the table. “A divorce, Eddie, really?”

“Ah, that. Yes really. You’ve been gone three years, Shannon. What did you expect to happen?!”

“Maybe a discussion first?”

“How was I supposed to get a hold of you? I tried emailing and calling. I had no idea where you were living. I tried to tell you when we moved to LA so maybe you could be a part of Chris’s life again. I tried.”

“I won’t let you take him from me, Eddie. I’ll fight you in court, and I will win. You know that as well as I do. You could barely support yourself when I left, let alone your son. Plus, I’m his mother. They’ll side with me.”

“Shannon, be reasonable. You’ve been gone for three years. You need to ease Chris back into seeing you again. You can’t just suddenly come back and take him from me. He will barely know who you are anymore.” Eddie says calmly. “Just sign the divorce papers. We can work out you being integrated back into his life once that’s all figured out.”

“No! I’m not signing shit. I will compromise instead of going to court, Eddie, but you have to be willing to listen.”

Buck hears Eddie sigh. “What do you want, Shannon?”

“I want to move back in. We can be together again and raise Christopher together. He’ll have his mom and dad together and we won’t need to fight.”

Buck gasps quietly.

“What? Shannon that makes no sense. We haven’t been together in three years and before that all we did was fight. I’m not doing that.”

“You may not have a choice, Eddie. Either you lose your son in court, or you let me move in and we can be a family together. Your decision.” With that, Shannon grabs the envelope, storming out.

Buck stops the recording as soon as the door closes behind her, coming from around the corner.

“So. That was Shannon, huh?” Buck says hesitantly, coming up beside him.

Eddie nods. “Sorry you had to witness that.”

“Eddie, it’s not your fault. I should tell you, though, I recorded the whole interaction after she started yelling.”

Eddie stays silent for a moment. “I don’t know what to do, Buck.” Eddie admits, quietly.

“Well, I’ll help you find a good lawyer. I’m sure Carla can help as well. She may have some good resources. We’ll get through this.”

“No, Buck. I don’t know if I can go through with the divorce.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, I can’t divorce Shannon if it means I’ll lose my son.”

“So, what, you’ll let her move in? You told me you weren’t happy with her.”

“I wasn’t.”

“How can you let yourself be in an unhappy marriage?”

“If it’s for Christopher, I’ll do anything.”

“What’s best for Christopher is two happy parents. Both of you will be miserable if you stay together.”

“I don’t know that, Buck. I can’t risk losing him if she wins in court.”

“She won’t. She was gone for three years with no contact.”

“I left too.”

“Sure, you may have left, but you kept in contact. You didn’t completely abandon your family. She did. A court will see that.”

“I can’t take that risk.” Eddie says quietly, looking away from Buck.

“Well, I can’t be someone’s second choice. I respect myself enough to not let myself come second in a relationship like this, Eddie. If you want to choose her, you can, but I’m not going to sit by and watch it happen.”

“I’m not choosing her, Buck. I’m choosing Chris. Can’t you see that? Everything I do is for Chris.”

“I know, Eddie. You love your son and you’ll do anything for him. But this? Staying with Shannon? That’s not for Chris. It’s for you. If you can’t see that, then I’m not sure what else I can say here. Call me if you change your mind.”

Eddie flinches.

“But Eddie?” Eddie looks up.” I won’t wait forever. I love you, bad time to tell you, but I know my worth. I’m not going to be the boyfriend until the wife comes back. I won’t let myself be treated like a side piece. So, make up your mind on what you want. Chris will understand. He just wants you happy.” With that, Buck leaves, closing the door, tears leaking from his eyes.

***

Buck lets himself spend the day in bed after leaving Eddie’s. He’s allowed to wallow in sadness for one day. After that, he goes on with life as normal as he can without Eddie. At the end of the week, he has a visitor at work. He tries not to let hope bloom in his chest, but ends up disappointed.

“Oh. What are you doing here, Chimney?” Buck asks.

“I came to talk to you. Is there somewhere we can talk in private?” He asks.

Buck nods, leading him into an interrogation room that’s not in use.

“We can talk in here, but if anyone needs the room, we’ll have to leave.”

“Okay.”

They stare at each other for a few minutes.

“Is there something you wanted to say or can I get back to work?” Buck starts to stand up.

“You need to talk to Maddie.”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m not talking to someone who accused me of murder and called me useless, Chim. It’s not happening.”

“Come on, Buck. You don’t know the whole story. Just hear her out.”

“What else could she possibly tell me that I don’t know?”

“She was hurting, Buck. She just lost her husband.”

“Yeah, she did. I lost my leg and my whole family in a few days. Her trauma and her hurt does not excuse what she said to me.”

“You don’t know enough about the situation. She’s pregnant, Buck. She just wants an apology and to make up with you, have her child’s uncle in our kid’s life.”

“I know nothing? I didn’t realize that I knew nothing about how he was beating her. How she was so brainwashed by him that she told me that I must’ve made him angry and that’s why the car crashed. I didn’t realize that the first time I heard about my parents having a third kid was when Maddie told me I couldn’t do my job and save him. I didn’t realize that her trauma excused her telling me that I was useless since I couldn’t even save that brother.”

Chimney flinches.

“Get out.”

“Buck, come on, be reasonable.”

“I am being reasonable. She may want a relationship now, but she’s not getting one. She should have thought of that before she came storming into my hospital room telling me how much she hated me. It’s too little too late.”

“Don’t you want to be in your niece or nephew’s life?”

“Not if it means I have to sacrifice my boundaries I don’t. I told her then and I’ll tell you now, I won’t be apologizing for what happened that day. The responsibility lies on Doug’s shoulders for driving recklessly.”

“Okay, fine.” Chimney storms out, slamming the door open as he goes.

Buck hangs his head. Someone knocks on the door.

“What was that about?” Maynard asks.

Buck looks up at her. “Apparently my sister moved to LA. She’s dating Chimney and she sent him to try to get me to talk to her.”

“Is this the same sister who Athena ranted about when she first met you?”

“One and the same.”

“Well, try not to let her get to you. You’re allowed to have boundaries and no one should get in the way of that.”

“I know. I have no issues holding to those boundaries, I just hope people can respect them.”

The two exit the interrogation room, both getting back to work.

***

That weekend, Buck takes Harry to Hen’s. While the boys are playing, Hen pulls him into a conversation.

“So I know it’s none of my business-“

“You’re right. Whatever it is, is none of your business.”

“-But I’m nosy. I’ve heard their side, but not yours.” Hen keeps speaking. “What happened with Maddie?”

“Athena never told you?”

“She told me your family abandoned you in your time of need, that’s all she would say.”

Buck sighs. “She was being abused by her husband. I found out right before I was supposed to leave. She was going to come with me. I went to confront him, and stupidly got in a vehicle with him. He started getting worked up and angry and soon started driving erratically and speeding on the highway. He crashed, was DOA, and I lost my leg. Maddie came into my hospital room accusing me of killing Doug, and spouting about how much she hated me. She also thought that was an appropriate time to tell me about her dead brother that I was born to save. She kept telling me that I failed what I was born to do and that I was useless. She even got our parents on her side, which wouldn’t have been hard. They never really loved me properly after Daniel died, I guess. Too resentful and grief stricken. Anyways, she left me alone, demanding that I apologize for stuff that isn’t my fault, and my parents shoved guilt money in my pockets as they told me I wouldn’t be allowed to live with them.”

Hen listens silently. “Thank you for telling me.”

“Let me guess, you are going to try to convince me to talk to her, to ‘hear her side’?”

“No. I’m not. That’s not fair to you and after hearing your side I can understand why you wouldn’t want to talk to her.”

“Thank you, Hen.”

“You’re welcome, Buckaroo.”

***

Over the course of the next two weeks, firefighters from the 118 came by his work to try to convince him to talk to Maddie. It was to the point that anyone who stopped by to see him was sent away by him with a curt “I’m not talking to Maddie. Leave.”

It was a shock when Lucy stops by. He’d met her a couple times, since her and Eddie were friends and partners.

“I’m not here to convince you to talk to your sister. From what I heard at that gathering, she doesn’t deserve to talk to you. She’s entitled anyways, I’ve thought that from the moment I first saw her.” Lucy responds to Buck’s opening statement.

“Then what are you here to talk about?” Buck asks.

“Eddie.”

Buck turns around, going to walk back into the building.

“Wait. Okay? Please just wait”

Buck stops, not turning around.

“He’s miserable. He won’t tell me or Hen what happened. Everyone else is assuming it has to do with them bugging him to talk you into talking to Maddie, but both me and Hen have noticed that’s not it. What happened, Buck?”

Buck sighs, turning around. “If Eddie hasn’t told you then I’m not going to, either. It’s his business to tell who he wants.”

“I get that, but clearly you’re involved. Do you have anyone to talk to about it?”

“No. No one that I want to know, anyways.”

“What about Athena? She may be able to help you.”

“I’ll find someone.”

“Okay. Hey, I know I’m Eddie’s friend first, but I like you, Buck. I hope you two can work out whatever is going on between you two.”

“Yeah. So do I.” Buck turns, leaving her outside.

***

Bobby is still suspended, so Buck is surprised when he corners Buck one day while Athena is out.

“Why haven’t you talked to your sister? Family is important, Buck.”

“Yes, I agree. Family is important. Which is why I still talk to the ones who were there for me. Maddie wasn’t. She was cruel when I needed support.”

“So did she. She was hurting. She was traumatized.”

“That doesn’t excuse her actions and words, though, as much as you’d like to think it does, it doesn’t. Are you done? I’m not going to keep talking about this.”

“Talking about what?” Athena asks, walking in the door.

“Bobby is trying to convince me to talk to Maddie, like most other people at the 118.”

Athena glares. “Bobby, we talked about this. I thought we had an understanding.”

“I just wanted to have a conversation about it with him.”

“And I told you not to. Everyone needs to start respecting his boundaries.”

Buck interrupts Athena before it can go much further. “I’m going to go, let you two fight this out. I’ll see you later, mom.” Buck kisses her cheek as he walks by.

“Okay, baby. If anyone else bothers you, let me know. I can get someone to send them both a cease and desist letter.”

“Okay. I will.”

With his evening now free, he decides to stop by his dads. He unlocks the door, calling out a greeting as he comes in.

“Hey. Everything okay? I know you were supposed to be with your mom tonight.”

“Yeah. Bobby started trying to convince me to talk to Maddie, then mom walked in. They started fighting about it so I left them to it.”

“Ah. Yeah I wouldn’t want to be Bobby right about now.”

“True.”

“How’re Eddie and Chris? You haven’t brought them up as much lately. Did he side with Maddie?”

Buck’s face falls. “No, he didn’t side with Maddie.”

“Okay. Then what happened?”

“He filed for divorce from Chris’s mother.”

“And that has you looking like someone kicked a puppy?”

“No. The morning after everything happened with Maddie she came over to Eddie’s. She told him that she would fight him for full custody unless he dropped the divorce and let her move back in. That they could be a family.”

“He didn’t choose her, did he? Does he still love her?”

“He told me he didn’t, but now I don’t know. I told him I wouldn’t sit around and wait forever, but that he needs to make a decision. I won’t be the boyfriend that passes the time until the wife comes back. I know I’m worth more than that, but it still hurts not to get chosen.”

“He may still choose you.”

“It’s been a month. I don’t think he’ll choose me. I told him I loved him for the first time during that fight.”

“Ah. So now you’re worried that not only were you just meant to pass the time, but that he meant more to you than you did to him.”

Buck nods.

“Well, as someone who almost stayed in a marriage for the kids, he may be under the impression that it’s better for Chris to have his parents together.”

“I know. I tried telling him that what’s best for Chris is two happy parents, but I don’t think he understood.”

“It may take some time. It did with me and your mom.”

“Yeah, the difference being you were in therapy.”

“Yeah, and who’s fault is that?”

Buck smiles.

“Thank you. I think I really needed to talk to someone about that.”

“Of course. I’m always here to listen.” Michael gives Buck a hug. “Now, supper’s done. Let’s eat.”

***

Buck is tuned into the news. He doesn’t usually watch the news, there’s enough bad things that happen at work, but after the bomb threats and his mom calling him to look out for any packages, he wants to stay informed. She was freaking out because Harry picked one up a few hours ago. She’s worried one will show up at Michael’s or Buck’s. He’s watching the news coverage of the other bombings when it hits him.

“Oh shit.” He immediately picks up his phone to call his mom. “The bomb wouldn’t be at our houses.”

“What? Buck, slow down. What’s going on.”

“The bomb. They already tried at your house, for your family. If they wanted Bobby, where would they go? Where’s Bobby’s family?”

With those words, Athena hangs up on him. He decides that while she’s busy, likely calling Bobby to warn him, he would call Maynard. They have a brief conversation, her telling Buck she’d look into it. Not even ten minutes later, breaking news comes onto the TV. Buck is glued to his seat as he sees the footage of a firetruck exploding. As the footage keeps going, he sees someone stuck under the truck. It’s not quite close enough to see who is under the truck, but his heart skips when he sees the 118 on the side of the flipped truck.

Buck has tears in his eyes as he watched a figure step into the street. Listening to the newsperson, he hears that someone has a bomb strapped to their chest. It takes less than ten minutes for the bomber to be tackled by a figure, who he learns is Bobby. There’s still no word on who is under the truck. He keeps his eyes glued to the screen, watching as they try to lift the truck off the person under it. The camera, despite how far away it is, picks up clearly the scream. Buck flinches. It doesn’t work. Buck sits through the crowd rushing forward, hearing that scream for a second time. Once he watches them get into the ambulance, Buck hears his phone go off with a text.

Bobby: It’s not Eddie. Eddie’s okay.

Buck sighs in relief at that text, not bothering to answer. He knows Bobby will be busy for the next few hours. He sits back against his couch, turning the news channel down to a lower volume. He still watches, but he isn’t paying as much attention as he was before. He feels relieved that Eddie wasn’t the one trapped. It makes him a little guilty over the relief, but he can deal with those emotions at therapy later.

***

Buck gets a phone call from Eddie.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

“Everything okay?”

“No, Buck. Everything isn’t okay. I miss you.”

“Does that mean you signed the divorce papers?”

Buck hears Eddie sigh on the other end of the line.

“I wanted you to hear it from me.”

“Hear what?”

“Shannon moved in last week.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah. Oh.”

“Why call me at all, then, Eddie?”

“I don’t know, Buck, I wanted you to hear it from me, not someone else at the station.”

“Who would have told me? The only people that know something went wrong are Hen and Lucy, and unless you told either of them what happened, they don’t know the details.”

“Did they say something to you?”

“Lucy stopped by the station to ask if we were okay. I didn’t give details. Hen has been giving me space, what with the whole Maddie thing.”

“Oh. What did you tell her?”

“Why? Nervous I told her about your wife? I’m sure you’ve already told everyone about your happy family.”

“I haven’t told anyone she’s back.”

“Oh, so you just decided to tell me as my own personal torture. Got it. Goodbye, Eddie.” Buck pulls the phone away from his ear.

“Wait! Please!” Buck hears faintly.

Buck slowly puts his phone back to his ear.

“I miss you.”

“Why tell me that?”

“I don’t know.”

“You chose Shannon. You chose her, you don’t get to tell me you miss me.”

“I did it for Chris.”

“Keep telling yourself that, Eddie, but we both know it’s a lie. You chose her for yourself.”

“I didn’t. I don’t love her.”

“You can convince yourself that all you like, but you still chose her.”

“Buck, please, you have to believe me. I don’t love her.”

“I don’t know what to believe anymore. I’ve got to go. I can’t keep listening to this. Don’t call again.” After this, Buck hangs up, letting his phone fall to the couch beside him as he lets himself cry.

***

“You’ve been isolating yourself. What happened?” May asks, walking into his house.

“Nothing happened. I haven’t been isolating myself.”

“You haven’t had me or Harry stay over recently and you’re ducking both mom and dad for dinner. Dad keeps telling mom to talk to you about it, but she’s about to go police sergeant on his ass to get information out of him.”

Buck groans. “I’ll talk to dad. Can you tell mom I’m fine?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because you’re not fine. You also haven’t given me any information so I’m not leaving until you talk to me.”

“Eddie’s wife came back. He chose her. She moved in. He made sure to call and tell me that himself.”

May gasps. “That asshole! And after everything I did to get you two together! Mom’s gonna be pissed.”

“Please don’t tell her. I’ll work up to it, I promise. I just don’t want her to know yet.”

“Fine. But I’m not making excuses. I’ll tell her to give you time, but I’m not going to lie to her.”

“Thanks. Now can you leave? I want to wallow.”

“No. I’m not going to let you wallow alone, big brother. You can suffer in my presence. Oh, and call dad.”

“Fine.” Buck picks up his phone, putting it on speakerphone as he dials.

“Hey, Buck. You’ve been avoiding me.”

“See, I told you.”

“Shush. I know, dad, I’m sorry.”

“So, what’s going on? Is it more stuff with Maddie?”

“No. It’s Eddie. He chose her, dad. She moved in, and he chose her.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Buck. I know that it’s a hard position to be in. Who told you? Did someone from the station tell you?”

“No. Eddie called him to tell him.”

“May!”

“What? He was going to find out eventually.”

“You weren’t going to lie to me, were you, Buck?”

“From the look on his face, I think he was.”

“I can’t tell you anything.” Buck groans, nudging his sister’s leg with his foot.

“Yes you can. Oh, and dad, we’re not telling mom. Buck said he’d tell her soon. Right, Buck?”

“Right.”

“You better. I can tell she’s close to storming over here and demanding answers.”

“I will. Goodbye, dad. Don’t worry about me. May is here to bother me.”

“Okay, son. Goodbye. Call if you need me to come over.”

Buck hangs up the phone. May keeps him company, forcing him to let her sleep over. She texts their mom to let her know she won’t be home, and luckily Athena leaves it alone. Buck is glad to see his sister and know that she loves him. It helps to know that he has someone in his corner, at least.

***

The next day, he arrives at work to see Maddie waiting for him.

“Oh good, you’re here. We’re talking.” She tries to tell him.

“No we’re not.” Buck strides into the building.

“Come on, Evan. Hear me out.” Maddie follows.

“No. I have nothing to say to you. Furthermore, I don’t want to hear whatever excuse you’ve told yourself over the last eight years. Leave.”

“Fine. But we’re not done.”

“Oh, yes we are.”

Once he watches her walk away, Buck calls his mom. “She came by the station. I think I need that cease and desist.”

“Okay, baby. I have one ready. I’ll get the lawyer to send it to her.”

“Thank you. I gotta get to work, though.”

“Okay. Come over for dinner tonight?”

“Not tonight. Next week. I have to work late this week, finish up a big case.”

“Okay. You better not cancel on me this time.”

“I won’t. I promise.”

Two days later, Buck sees two people he wanted to see less than Maddie, waiting for him when he finished work.

“What the fuck are you two doing here?” Buck asks Margaret and Phillip.

“Is that any way to talk to your parents, Evan?” Margaret snipes.

“No, but it’s a good thing you aren’t my parents. You stopped being my parents the moment you walked out of that hospital room.”

“Evan, that’s not nice. We did our best.” Phillip says next.

“No you didn’t, and my name’s not Evan.”

“Of course it is. That’s what we named you.” Margaret says.

“I had it legally changed when my real parents adopted me. They actually love me, unlike you two.”

“We love you.” Margaret defends.

“No. If you loved me, you wouldn’t have abandoned me when I needed you most. So please, fuck off.”

“Don’t be like this. Come on, talk to your sister. She misses you. All you have to do is apologize.” Phillip tries to convince.

“No. I won’t apologize and I won’t talk to her. Leave before I have you arrested.”

“We’ve done nothing wrong. You can’t have us arrested.” Margaret grins.

“If you didn’t notice, we’re at a police station. You’re harassing me. I can and will have you arrested.”

“Fine. Be like that, but if you don’t apologize to Maddie, you won’t get any more money from us.” Phillip tells him.

“I don’t need your money.”

Buck doesn’t give them time to reply. He walks to his vehicle, driving away.

***

Buck pulls up to his mom’s place.

“Hey mom. I’m home!” Buck calls out.

“Finally. Sit. What’s been going on with you?”

“The Buckley’s showed up. Maddie must’ve called them. They left when I threatened to have them arrested.”

“Good. If they come around again, don’t talk to them, just have them arrested. Maynard knows the situation, so she’ll do her best to make any charges stick.”

“I will.”

“Now, what else has been going on?” Athena asks.

“How do you know it’s not just Maddie?” Buck asks.

“Because I know my kid. One moment, Eddie is taking you home, the next, you haven’t mentioned him at all. What happened?”

“His wife came back.”

“That’s it? His wife came back and you’re done?”

“Yeah. She threatened to sue for full custody if he didn’t give their marriage another try. He’s scared he’ll lose, so he agreed. We’re over.”

“I’m sorry, baby.”

“I tried to tell him that what’s best for Chris is two happy parents, but I guess he didn’t listen.”

“Maybe he thinks they can be happy together again.”

“I would believe that if he truly did. He called to tell me that he misses me, and kept insisting he doesn’t love her, but I think otherwise. If he didn’t love her, I don’t think he would have chosen her.”

“He may have. Me and Michael almost didn’t get divorced. It would have been for you kids. Then, you got into our heads, so thank you for that.”

“You’re welcome.” Buck leans his head on Athena’s shoulder, letting his mom comfort him.

***

Three months later, and Buck gets a text from Chimney with a picture attached.

Chimney: Our daughter, your niece, Jee-Yun Buckley-Han. Figured you’d want to know. Maybe now you two can work on a relationship, for Jee-Yun.

Buck: She’s cute. I’m not apologizing, Howard. Take care of the two of them. I won’t have seeing and meeting my niece as a conditional thing. She won’t be held over my head, it’s not fair to either of us. Congrats on being a father.

With that, Buck blocks Chimney’s number. He knows that the other man won’t stop and he doesn’t want to hear it.

Chapter Nine

Buck looks outside. It’s a nice day. Buck thinks about different things he could do on such a nice day. Normally he’d go to the zoo, but he hasn’t been able to bring himself to go since his phone call with Eddie. He misses both Eddie and Chris, and going to the place he first met them is hard. Instead, when Harry asks to go, May takes him instead, or Hen will. Buck isn’t sure what Eddie’s told the 118 and he hasn’t asked. No one has mentioned it to him. They know Eddie and Buck are no longer together, but beyond his immediate family, Buck hasn’t told anyone else what happened.

Since the zoo is out, Buck decides to wander down to the pier. He walks around all morning. He sees when the 136 pulls up. He watches as they rush over to the mascot to help. Slowly, he makes his way along the pier, eventually ending up beside their firetruck when he hears a voice.

“Buck!”

He turns, seeing Christopher walking towards him, with Shannon following slowly.

“Hey, buddy! How are you?”

“Good. Mom’s here!”

“Yeah, that’s great!” Buck says, pulling a happy face for the kid.

He refuses to look over at Shannon. He pretends it’s not out of spite. A loud noise pierces the air. Buck feels the fear set in, deep in his gut, as he looks towards the pier.

“Tsunami!” Buck yells.

Buck acts before he thinks, grabbing Christopher and shoving him on top of the truck. Next comes Shannon as he quickly climbs up.

“Hold on! This thing is going to move!” Buck yells at them.

Buck pins both Christopher and Shannon down with his body, grabbing each side of the firetruck tightly as he does. He makes sure as best he can that both Shannon and Chris are holding on to something. He can hear Shannon and Chris screaming in his ear as the truck jostles and moves. His hands slip as water pours over them, but he does his best to grip onto the truck. It feels like a lifetime as well as no time at all when the truck stills. Buck stays where he is for another few moments before he lets go, allowing himself to sit up.

“Are you both okay?”

“I lost my crutches.”

“That’s okay, sweetie, we have some extra ones at home.” Shannon says, voice shaky.

Before Buck can reply, he sees someone trying to swim against the current, away from them.

“Here! Over here! Swim to the truck! I’ll help you on when you get closer!”

They must just barely be able to hear him, because they look over, then redirect themselves to the truck. When they get close, Buck holds out his hand. The woman grabs it, swinging herself up.

“Wow, fancy seeing you here.” Lucy comments, once she sees who’s there.

“I could say the same to you. Aren’t you still with the 118?”

“I should be, yeah. Bobby was mad that I stood up to him, so he had me cover someone on medical leave at the 136.” Lucy looks around the truck, eyes widening with who else is on the truck. “Hey, Chris. Did your dad know you were at the pier today?”

“I don’t have to tell him everything, you know. He didn’t need to hear about our every move. Right, Chris?” Shannon says instead.

“I take it Eddie doesn’t know that he needs to look for his kid today?” Lucy counters.

“No. He doesn’t know he needs to look for his kid and WIFE.” Shannon snips.

Lucy’s eyes widen in shock as she glances at Buck. Before she can properly react, they hear a shout.

Lucy and Buck quickly make a plan. Lucy, having the experience of a firefighter, will jump in with the hose. She’ll tie it off across the way to catch anyone who can grab it. Buck will help pull anyone up onto the truck while Lucy stays in the water, grabbing those who can’t get to the line. They spend a lot of time doing that, until she’s exhausted and there’s more bodies floating by than people. Buck helps Lucy up and they make space beside Chris, who insists they both sit with him and his mom. Chris squirms his way between Buck and Shannon, leaning against Buck’s arm.

“Chris, scoot closer to me. He’s a stranger. I’m sure he doesn’t want you leaning against him.” Buck sees Lucy pull a face out of the corner of his eye at Shannon’s words.

“He’s not a stranger, mom! He’s Buck! Him and dad used to go out. He was over all the time.” Chris is quick to inform.

“What did you just say, Chris?”

“What, you didn’t know your husband had a boyfriend?” Lucy snipes.

“Lucy. Leave it, Chris is here.” Buck says quietly to her.

“No. I didn’t know. How long ago was this?”

“We broke up three months ago.” Buck makes direct eye contact with Shannon as she makes the connection.

“I miss seeing you around, Buck. You watched all the fun documentaries with me.” Chris says.

“I miss you too, Superman.” Buck tries to smile.

“I watch documentaries with you, Chris.” Shannon says.

“Yeah but it’s not the same. I miss watching them with Buck.”

“I’m sure watching them with your mom is just as fun.” Buck tells him. He still hasn’t looked over at Shannon much, he can’t.

“Hold on everybody, another wave is coming!” Lucy yells out.

The truck starts to shake. Buck tries his best to keep Chris as still as he can, making sure he stays put. The wave is slowing down some when someone pops over the side, trying to claw their way up. Buck can already see how this is going to go, so he passes Chris off to Lucy, giving her a look. He scoots to Shannon, locking his arms around her waist as best as he can as the man grabs her arms, trying to pull himself up. Debris hits him and he loses his grip. In the struggle, Shannon starts to slip over the edge of the truck. Buck tries to anchor them both to the truck. Unless he lets go of Shannon, he can’t get himself back up. He can hear Chris crying and screaming in the background, but lets himself be dragged off after her.

It’s a whirlpool. He tries his best to hold onto Shannon’s waist but at some point, the wave is too strong. He can feel her scratching at his arms, grabbing wherever she can. He tries to do the same. It takes minutes before he’s able to break the surface, gasping. He takes a moment to look around, wading the best he can with a heavy prosthetic. He sees a roof he can climb on a ways away, but no sign of Shannon. He swims over and is about to climb on when he hears her screams for help. Looking back over his shoulder, she’s not far away, but looks disoriented. He waits for her to pass, grabbing her.

“Climb onto the roof. I’ll boost you the best I can.” Buck tells her.

Once Shannon is on the roof, Buck climbs up after her. Buck pulls up his pant leg to examine the prosthetic. It’s busted with how much water and force has been upon it. Not to mention it wasn’t designed with swimming in mind, so isn’t exactly water friendly. He briefly considers taking it off and leaving it here, but knows that’s a bad idea. Once the water subsides, he’ll have to walk. He doesn’t have his crutches with him or a wheelchair and he doesn’t want to be stranded.

“Are you hurt?” Shannon asks quietly.

“Probably. My prosthetic is busted, but I won’t know what it’s like under it until I take it off. I can’t take it off now without being stranded here since I don’t have any mobility aids with me and as soon as we can, we should start looking for Chris.”

“We? We won’t be going anywhere. I’ll be going to look for my son. Alone.”

“I’m not leaving you alone right now. Look, I’ll help you look for him. As soon as we find him, I’ll help us all get to a hospital to get checked over, then I’ll be gone.”

“The sooner you’re gone, the better. Eddie and I are happy. Chris is happy. We don’t need you anymore now that I’m back in their lives.”

“I was there that day, you know.”

“What? What day? What are you talking about?”

“That day that you stormed in, yelling at Eddie about a divorce. I know about the threats.”

“And? He still chose me.”

“I know he did.” Buck looks away from her. “How long do you think he’ll stay in an unhappy marriage, Shannon? We may not have lasted, but neither will you.”

“Stop. We’re happy. We’ll stay together.”

“Whatever you say, Shannon, but he kept telling me he was staying because of Chris. Eventually, that won’t work anymore.”

“You don’t know anything.”

“How often are you two fighting?”

Shannon stays silent, which is enough of an answer for Buck.

“I’m not saying this to get him back. He made his choice already, but what’s best for Chris is two happy parents. If you two can’t stop fighting long enough to be happy, Chris will feel that. You’ll make him miserable. Don’t ruin all three of you.”

“I don’t want Chris to be taken from me.”

“Well then I guess you should have thought of that before you abandoned them. The water’s receding. We should go look for Chris.”

“I’ll go alone. I don’t need your help.”

“I don’t care whether or not you need my help. It will be better for Chris if we both search together. Think only about him for once, Shannon, not about yourself.”

“Fine. But you better not slow me down.”

They climb off the roof slowly and start making their way towards where they think they last saw the truck. It takes hours, and Buck convinces Shannon to let him help the stranded people. Both because it’s the right thing to do, and because they can ask them if they’d seen Chris. She doesn’t help as much, she doesn’t have the same first aid experience as Buck, but does stop when someone cries for help. When Buck needs help, he instructs her what to do and she listens.

Eventually they end up back at the firetruck to find it empty. The water has receded by now and it’s starting to get dark. Someone walks by.

“Hey, do you know where the people on top of this truck went?” Buck stops them to ask.

“I dunno, but if I had to guess probably the field hospital. They set one up a ways that way. Check there first.” The man points.

“Okay. Thank you.” Buck looks to Shannon. “I think we should head there, see if they beat us there.”

Shannon nods. Buck can feel the exhaustion in every part of his bones and can tell she’s just as tired. Now that they have a destination, they set off, Buck limping slowly behind Shannon. The people they can help slowly dwindles the closer they get to the field hospital. At some point, Shannon and Buck end up walking beside each other, leaning against one another. It’s an unspoken agreement that they both need help.

By the time the hospital is in sight, Buck can feel his brain slowing down. If Chris isn’t here, he’s not sure what else he can do to look for the boy before he passes out. They both stumble into the front of the hospital. They take a look around, not speaking as they do. Suddenly, Shannon is taking off, making Buck stumble a bit as his weight is more evenly distributed onto his prosthetic. He watches as she runs up to Chris, who is crying inconsolably into Eddie’s shoulder.

As soon as Shannon reaches them, Eddie takes her into his arms. He kisses her head, not looking in the direction she came from. Buck turns, readying himself to go into the hospital.

“Eddie noticed us as soon as we walked in. He’s been inconsolable for the last hour. Someone on the truck told him we don’t need to look for you two because you’d be dead. I made sure to yell at them when he wasn’t in earshot.” Lucy comes up beside him. “Let me help you.”

“Thanks. Wheelchair?”

Lucy nods, walking off to grab one. As soon as she comes back, Buck sits down, immediately taking off his prosthetic and putting it in his lap. Lucy wheels him to a bed and starts looking him over.

“Does Eddie know?”

“That you fell in with Shannon? No. He has no idea you were with us. We were both concentrated on comforting Chris and I haven’t managed to tell him yet.”

“Don’t. If they don’t tell him, I don’t want him to know.”

“He’d want to know you’re alright.”

“Then he can call me himself.”

Lucy quiets as she checks over the rest of him.

“What happened, Buck? You two were happy and suddenly I’m stuck in a tsunami, on top of a firetruck, with his wife who moved in?”

“She came back. He chose her. What did you do to piss off Bobby?”

“Nice deflection. I told him he was out of line. The person under the truck? He had to get his leg amputated from the crush injury. Bobby told him he wouldn’t be able to come back as a firefighter even though there are plenty of resources for amputees to be able to work in this field. He took the first opportunity after I yelled at him to have me cover someone else. I’ve been helping the other firefighter with the union stuff and a plan for his healing and stuff.”

Buck nods at her. “He needs therapy. I wonder if mom knows about this.”

“I doubt it. I don’t think Athena Grant would put up with it.”

“I’ll tell her. She can convince him to get therapy.”

“Good. He’s usually a good captain, but not lately.”

The two fall silent as a doctor stops by to assess Buck. He’s given some antibiotics and advice to make an appointment for his doctor to get another prosthetic. They get him into a travel bus, and Buck looks to Lucy as she climbs on after him.

“Want to come to mine? We can have nightmares together.”

“You’re not my type, Grant.”

“Neither are you, Donato. Come on. I have a spare bedroom, two showers, and a wish to not be alone. Plus, unless I crawl, I’m not going to be able to get into my house.”

“Okay. Wait, did anyone call Athena and Michael and tell them you were missing?”

“I guess we’ll find out when we get to my place. If they didn’t, I guarantee they’ll be waiting.”

***

Buck was right. When he gets home, Athena is in his living room.

“Oh baby. Thank God you’re okay. I was worried sick when I didn’t hear from you. Where were you?”

“We got caught up in the tsunami. Buck helped me onto the firetruck he ended up on top of. With Shannon and Chris.”

Athena pulls back, surprised. “Chris? As in, Eddie’s Chris?”

Buck nods his head.

“Are they alright?”

Lucy nods. “They made it to the field hospital where they found Eddie. Buck insisted I come here so we can both shower.”

“I also didn’t want to be alone in the house tonight. Not after today.”

“Okay. Would you like me to go home? I can stay if you need.”

Buck shakes his head. “I think Bobby needs you more. Oh, and get him therapy. He’s holding back a firefighter from coming back instead of getting him proper resources.”

“We’ll talk about that another day. You need a shower and rest right now.” Athena hugs her son, then Lucy. “Take care of him.”

“I will.”

Lucy enters first, leaving Buck on the step, grabbing his wheelchair for him to use. Buck and Lucy then get showered. He forces them to eat some of the leftovers he had in the fridge, then he sets her up in the spare bedroom. It doesn’t take long for him to fall asleep once he’s in bed. He wakes with a jolt, feeling someone shaking him and calling his name.

Buck sits up. “What’s going on?”

“You were having a nightmare.” Lucy says, perched hesitantly on the edge of his bed.

“Oh. I’m sorry if I woke you.”

“No, it’s alright. You’re good.”

Buck scoots over, leaving room for her to sit beside him.

“Come sit.”

Lucy does, leaning her head on Buck’s shoulder.

“We’re going to be pretty fucked up for a while, huh?” Lucy says.

“I think so.”

“What happened, after you fell in?”

“We ended up making our way to a rooftop to wait until the water receded. After it did, we spent the time trying to find Chris. I knew you wouldn’t have willingly left him so I figured you would keep him as safe as you could. Along the way, I helped anyone I could to get free.”

“I’m surprised Chris’s mother let you tag along.”

“She didn’t have much of a choice. I told her that we’d stick together until we found Chris, then I’d leave her be. It took a little convincing the first time, but she let me stop to help people. After that, it was a process. We’d hear someone yell, we’d stop, I’d help them out, then ask them if they’d seen Chris. Eventually we made our way to the field hospital where Shannon found Eddie and Chris.”

“He didn’t tell anyone, you know.”

“Who?”

“Eddie. He mentioned you two had broken up, but he didn’t tell anyone that his wife had come back and moved in.”

“Oh.”

They sit in silence for another few minutes.

“I told him I loved him, you know. Shannon had just come over and I had watched them fight. She hadn’t seen me. We fought about her, and I told him I loved him, but that I respected myself enough that I wouldn’t be their second choice. He never said it back.”

“I think he loves you too.”

“It doesn’t matter if he does or not. He still chose her.”

“Yeah. He did.”

“The worst part is, I still miss him. For months, we spent every day we could together. I know I fell fast, but we grew serious very quickly. I miss our evenings together with Chris the most.”

“Chris still talks about you to me, sometimes. I’ll watch him sometimes, and he talks about missing you and he wishes you were still around. He also hadn’t mentioned his mom to me. But when Eddie’s around, you never come up.”

“A part of me hopes I never have to see them again. I don’t know if I can handle them playing happy family in front of me, but I also don’t want them to be disinvited from firefam barbecues. I know Bobby has hosted at least once since he was reinstated.”

“And the other part?”

“I hope that he reaches out, at least to tell me that Chris is okay and to check in on me after the tsunami. See how I’m doing. I know that he’s stubborn, so he won’t leave Shannon now that he’s decided to stay. But I hope he at least cares enough to check in.”

Buck feels Lucy nod against his shoulder.

“I’ll have to get a new car. Mine got swept up in the wave.”

Lucy laughs at that. “That’s what you’re focusing on?”

“It’s better than thinking about anything else that happened.”

“True. I’ll give you that. Mine was at the 136, so I’m in the same boat as you there.”

Buck is almost asleep against the headboard when Lucy groans.

“My apartment was in the path of the wave. I got a good deal on an apartment near the Santa Monica pier. I’m pretty sure I’m homeless now.”

Buck takes a moment to think. “Move in here.”

“What? I couldn’t do that.”

“Why not? I’ve got the space for it, while still having room for my siblings. It’s not like you can ask Eddie. He doesn’t have a spare room and I doubt his couch will be comfy enough to sleep on. I don’t mind having a roommate.”

“Yeah. Okay. I’ll move in.”

“We should get some sleep. Mom’ll probably be here in a few hours. She’ll make sure we eat, but then I’m sure she’ll want to take us both out to replace our phones. We can probably also convince her to let us go clothes shopping for you as well.”

“Oh shit. I’ll have to do that. There’s no way that any of my stuff will have been okay after the flood. I’ll also have to go to the bank to cancel and replace my cards. You should do that too.”

“Yeah. Lay down and go to sleep.” Buck tells her, scooting down the bed, disturbing her head.

“I can go back to the spare room.” Lucy replies weakly.

“You can also stay here for the rest of the night. We’re both tired and traumatized. We can help each other through the nightmares we’re both bound to have.”

“Okay, but if you start feeling me up, I can’t promise I won’t break your hand.” Lucy warns.

Buck laughs. “I won’t feel you up, I promise.”

***

Buck wakes up to hear movement in the kitchen. Lucy is still asleep on the other side of the bed, curled into herself. Grabbing his crutches, Buck gives her some time to rest while he gets changed. He rifles through May’s room to see if there are any clothes that would fit Lucy that are too big on May. All he finds is a dress, so that’ll have to do. It’s not like she can go out in the t-shirt and sweats he lent her last night. He then wakes her up and hands her the dress.

“A dress? Really?”

“It’s all my sister had here that was too big for her that would also fit you. We’ll get you some clothes after breakfast. I hear mom in the kitchen.”

With that, Buck leaves her in his room. When he gets to the kitchen, both his parents and his siblings are there, helping with breakfast.

“Morning.”

At Buck’s voice, all four of them spin around. May and Harry speed towards him, engulfing him in a hug.

“Lucy was in your bed.” May comments.

“I know. She slept there most of the night.”

“Is she your girlfriend like Eddie was your boyfriend?” Harry asks.

Buck pulls a face. “No. Lucy is not my girlfriend, nor will she ever be. We’re just friends who needed the support after last night.”

“Oh, thanks, Buck. Am I not girlfriend worthy?” Lucy walks into the kitchen at that moment, fully dressed.

“Shut it. You know you feel the same way so don’t start.”

“I do, that’s true.”

“Is that my dress?” May pulls back from Buck.

“Uh yeah. I hope it’s okay. I gave it to Lucy to borrow for today. It was either that or her ripped and dirty uniform from yesterday since all my clothes are too big.”

“Yeah that’s fine.”

Once Harry pulls back from the hug and goes to help with breakfast, both Michael and Athena take turns hugging him.

“I’m so glad you’re okay.” Michael whispers to him.

“Me too, dad. Me too.”

“So, I’m thinking we eat, then we can all go out and start getting replacement phones for you both. I don’t imagine they survived.”

They both shake their heads.

“Lucy, did you need us to run by your place at all?” Athena asks over breakfast.

“I don’t think we’ll be able to. It was in the path of the wave. I’d be surprised if anything survived.”

“Oh. Where will you be staying?” Michael asks.

“Here. She’s moving in for a bit.”

“Okay. What do you need while we’re out?” Athena asks next.

“We both need to get new phones and go to the bank. I need new clothes, since all of mine were in my apartment.”

“I’m going to need to go by the hospital or make an appointment at some point to get checked out and to get a fit for a replacement prosthetic. We both also lost our cars in the wave.”

“Insurance should cover the prosthetic and the car. It’ll take a few weeks to sort through all the claims, so keep any receipts you may have. Are you going to stay in your chair all day or do you need your crutches?” Athena tells the two.

“The chair for today. I’m still very sore, I wouldn’t want to make it worse by having to manoeuvre around with crutches for hours.”

It takes all day, but eventually they finish everything they need. Lucy has a whole new wardrobe. They both decided to wait on getting new vehicles until their insurance claims can go through, which they stopped to put in with their insurance companies. As soon as Buck has a phone, he has a call in to his doctor. They have an appointment set for the next day that May is taking him to.

When they get home, Athena makes them both supper, having sent Michael home with May and Harry. While she’s cooking, Buck helps Lucy get set up in the spare room. Once she’s all set up, they eat supper with Athena. She makes sure they’re okay then leaves.

***

A month later, Buck is still having nightmares. They aren’t nearly as bad as they were, but seeing the devastation of the city doesn’t help. He brings it up with Lucy, who’d just been reinstated at the 118 a few days before.

“Why don’t you move?”

“Move? Away from LA?”

“Yeah.”

“My family’s here. I couldn’t leave them.”

“Okay. So why don’t you see if there are any temporary jobs you can take outside of LA? That way you won’t be gone forever and you can take time to heal.”

“Plus, I can get out of my head. Eddie never ended up contacting me.”

“Yeah. I’d be willing to tell you how they are, but Eddie took some time off and he keeps dodging my calls.”

“I know. I appreciate that, but if Eddie hasn’t reached out, he doesn’t want me to know.”

“Maybe it is a good idea to get out of the city. You don’t even need to take a temp job. You can travel a bit, heal yourself from both the tsunami and Eddie. I can look after your place while you’re gone. Consider it, at least.”

“Yeah. I have some leave I can take from work. I could use up my vacation days then take some unpaid leave. Maybe go travelling for six months. Clear my head, help forget about Eddie. It feels like such a short time for most people, and it might’ve been, if you only count the time when we were officially dating. We knew each other for almost a year when Shannon came back, though. We dated for about six months of those, taking it slow to get to know each other, but I spent most of my free time with them. If I wasn’t with them, then I was with my siblings or parents.”

“I can help you plan your trip, if you’d like. It may be good for you to get some space from everything that’s happened.”

“Sure. Let me talk to mom and dad about it, then I can talk to work and get a plan.”

***

At the next Grant family dinner, both Buck and Athena and Bobby have an announcement. Buck lets his mom go first. She shows off the ring Bobby had gotten her and everyone congratulates the two on their engagement. Then, Buck tells them he’s thinking about going travelling for six months. His family help him work out some details, but are supportive of him, ultimately. The next step is to talk to work.

The next day, he knocks on Maynard’s door.

“You’re not coming in to hand in your resignation, are you?”

“No. It’s not that. I actually was thinking about travelling. I’m still dealing with some stuff with the tsunami and figured travelling would be good for me. Get some space, clear my head.”

“Okay. How much time do you need?”

“I was thinking six months? I know most of that will be unpaid, but I think I need the time.”

“Yeah, I’ll figure something out. Take the time to yourself, heal.”

“Thanks. I appreciate it.”

“I will need a month to get everything figured out, though, Buck.”

“Okay. That gives me enough time to plan everything.”

“Take care of yourself.”

***

Lucy helps Buck plan his trip. He’s going to go on a road trip across the states, and into Canada. He’ll go where he wants, and has a set up in his SUV to camp with an air mattress for most nights, as well as a tiny camping stove and cooler. He’s said goodbye to his family and has promised to call. He’s loading up his vehicle, Lucy at work, when a truck pulls up.

“Are you going somewhere?” Eddie asks, approaching Buck.

“Why do you care?” Buck snipes.

“Come on, Buck. Don’t be like that.”

“Why not? I haven’t heard from you in months, and suddenly you’re showing up at my doorstep? What do you want, Eddie?”

“Can’t I just stop by to see you?”

“No. You chose Shannon, Eddie. You don’t get to just stop by for no reason.”

“Come on, Buck. That’s not fair. I did it for Christopher.”

“You keep telling yourself that. Did you ask Chris what he wants? Or did you just assume?”

“Every child wants their parents together.”

“No. Children want and deserve two happy parents.”

“How do you know we’re not happy?”

“Are you?” Buck asks.

Eddie looks away.

“That’s what I thought. Now, I’ll ask again. What do you want?”

“It’s Chris… He was in the tsunami, I’m not sure if anyone told you.”

“You’re not sure- you’re kidding, right? You have to be.”

“I wouldn’t joke about that, Buck. Both Shannon and Chris were trapped in it. She managed to get them on top of a firetruck, then got separated from him. She spent all day searching for him and helping people.”

“Oh, she did, did she? This is unbelievable.”

“What? What’s unbelievable?”

“Nothing. What’s wrong with Chris? Is he okay?” Buck’s tone gentles when he talks about Chris.

“No. He’s been having nightmares. He… he wouldn’t tell me what they were about for the longest time. Hell, he still won’t tell me what he went through.”

“Nightmares about what?”

“He finally admitted to me what they were about. He dreams about you. Drowning. He said he didn’t want to tell me because it would hurt me, and then asked why no one took him to your funeral like we did with Abuelo when he died. He thought you were dead, Buck. He still doesn’t believe you’re alive. Could you- would you let him come over, see for himself that you’re alive?”

Buck thinks about it for a moment. “Yes. Come by after you pick him up today.”

“Thank you, Buck.”

“But Eddie?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m doing it for Chris.”

Eddie nods, turning away. When Buck watches Eddie turn away, he finishes packing his vehicle then calls Lucy to tell her what happened.

“Please tell me you corrected Eddie about you being there?” Lucy asks after he finishes his story.

“No. There’s no point.”

“Buck, you deserve for him to know.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t want to have that conversation with him.”

“Okay. I get that. I’ll drop it.”

At that moment, the bell goes off and Lucy has to hang up. A few hours later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it to see Eddie, Chris hiding behind him. As soon as Chris sees Buck, he bursts into tears, rushing forward into Buck’s arms.

“Hey, Superman. I’m okay.” Buck rubs the boy’s back in comforting circles, murmuring softly to him.

After a while, Chris’s sobs slow down. “You’re really okay, Bucky?”

“I am. I promise.”

“Okay. Can I see you more? I miss you.”

“Oh, Superman. I miss you too. I don’t know if we’ll be able to see each other more. That’s something for your mom and dad to decide.”

“Okay.” Chris says in a small voice.

“Come on, Chris. We have to go. Your mom is waiting for us.”

“Goodbye, Bucky. I’m glad you’re okay.”

“So am I. I’m glad you’re okay too.”

Buck gives Chris one more hug. Once they leave, he gets in his vehicle, driving away with a broken heart.

***

Buck takes his time with driving. He’ll get out whenever he wants to sightsee, but over a week and he feels a bit lighter. He gets a call and picks it up without looking at who it is.

“You left? Why didn’t you tell me you were leaving?”

“It was none of your business.” Buck tells Eddie.

“Why did you leave?”

“What reason did I have to stay? So I can watch you be miserable as you play happy family with your wife? The same wife you said you wouldn’t take back? The second she tries to blackmail you, you give in. You refuse to take a step back and think, maybe you’d win if you fought. She left, she abandoned your son for three years with no contact. But no. You refuse to see anything other than what’s right in front of you.”

“That’s not fair and you know it.”

“Isn’t it, Eddie? You promised me you wouldn’t abandon me like Margaret and Phillip, but the first chance you get, you do. I couldn’t keep seeing you being happy. It was bad enough to know you didn’t care after the tsunami. You didn’t reach out to see how I was. You only came by for Chris.”

“After the tsunami? Buck, I had to look after my wife and kid, who were in the tsunami.”

“Yeah. So was I, Eddie! I helped Shannon and Chris onto the truck! I fell in after Shannon and helped all those people. I helped her look for Chris! And I know you didn’t see me behind her. You were more focused on your family. But maybe if you had been at work or not ducking Lucy’s calls, you’d have known. Why else would Chris think I was dead?” Buck says the last part quietly.

“What? No, Buck, you can’t have been. Someone would have told me.”

“Who, Eddie? You were at home, isolating yourself, not talking to anyone.”

Eddie stays silent on the other line for a moment. “When are you coming back?”

“I don’t know. Six months, probably.”

“Can I- would it be okay if I came by to see you?”

“No, I don’t think so Eddie. If you want to bring Chris by, maybe, but I can’t see you anymore. It hurts too much. Goodbye.” With that, Buck hangs up on him. He pulls off, letting himself cry once again.

***

Buck tries to forget about Eddie on his trip. He sightsees some American sights that he’s always wanted, then travels through Canada. He stops in at different sights, making sure to stop in the mountains, slowly driving his way back to LA. On his last leg of the trip, he takes some time to evaluate.

After seeing Chris again, he decided he wants a family of his own. Having a kid would be great, in any capacity. The heartbreak hasn’t really gone away, a part of him will always love and miss Eddie and Chris. Even though they only had a short time together, Buck still loved the two of them a lot. He would try his hand at getting out there and dating, something he hadn’t been able to bring himself to do much on his travels. He’d had hookups, sure, but nothing serious since Eddie.

He gets back into LA mid-morning. Lucy knows he’s coming home today, he made sure to tell her so she wouldn’t be scared by him coming home. He opens the door, immediately going to the laundry room to do up the laundry he hadn’t gotten to last time he stopped somewhere. He takes another trip out to his vehicle to grab the food, then grabs his mattress. He puts away the leftover food, grabbing the cooking stove he brought on the trip. Once laundry and everything was all put away, he made lunch. He knew Lucy would be done with her shift soon so he made enough for her as well.

“I’m home!” Buck hears Lucy call out.

He looks over his shoulder at her, “just finishing up with lunch. You gonna eat?”

“Yeah, I’m starving. Bobby didn’t have time to make breakfast before we were called out. We only got back to the station with enough time to shower before our shift ended.”

“Good thing I made a lot, then.”

“How was your trip?” Lucy asks, “I got all the pictures you sent.”

“It was really good. Super freeing to not have to schedule anything.”

“Good.”

They fall into silence while they finish eating. It doesn’t take long to eat, then clean up after themselves. They sit on the couch once they are done.

“I think I know what I want to do.” Buck says once they’re settled.

“Oh? What’s that?”

“I want a family. It may not have worked out between Eddie and I, and that’s okay, but I want something like what we had.”

“Is it hard? The what ifs?”

“Sometimes. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if he had gotten the divorce, or if Shannon had just signed the papers without coming back. It’s useless to think about that, though, since it doesn’t change where it ended up.”

“Okay. So, back to the family thing.”

Buck nods for her to continue.

“What are your goals there?”

“I don’t know how it would work, but I want kids at least some time in the future. I do want a romantic relationship as well, not just sexual. They’ll have to want kids. I haven’t worked out any details, but I know what I want out of life.”

“Wow. I’m proud of you. Travelling was really good for you.”

“It really was.”

“Now, let’s get you what you want.”

“Yeah. I’m happy, you know? For the first time in so long, I’m genuinely happy. I know where I want my life to go. I have people in my corner, and I have a job to go back to that I love.”

“You big sap.”

“Oh shut up. You love me.”

“You wish.”

Buck takes the time to look over his life. He may not be in a romantic relationship right now, but overall, he’s happy. He has a goal for the future and knows what he wants. Along with that, he has supportive friends and family. He knows what he’s worth, and knows when someone isn’t treating him right. He doesn’t know what the future may hold, all he knows is that he has the support he needs to handle anything life can throw his way.

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